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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Wibu to call someone at their place of work to ask them out?

121 replies

Scoopstroop · 21/08/2020 20:53

Just that really.
Its a service I use every few weeks, have met and chatted a few times now.
Its his own business so I wouldn't have to call through a reception/office and there won't be other people around.
Is this a really creepy stalkery thing to do or should I just go for it?

OP posts:
Blankblankblank · 21/08/2020 21:24

Someone called DH’s place of work and asked him out. He’s a friendly, chatty bloke and she read the signals all wrong.

InFiveMins · 21/08/2020 21:24

Go for it OP. life is too short - call him and ask him out!

vegansprinkle · 21/08/2020 21:26

Do it!!!!

longcoffeebreak · 21/08/2020 21:30

God almighty it's not harassment to ask someone out!!!

Runkle · 21/08/2020 21:33

Don't ring, it's weird and awkward if he takes the call in front of colleaguea/customers etc. I had a a man do this to me and I found it creepy. Like pp have said shoe on other foot it would be a different matter. Just ask him in person.

Oblomov20 · 21/08/2020 21:38

If he's your sons barber, pop in, when there are no customers. And ask.
Phoning is not ok.

Original poster
Scoopstroop · 21/08/2020 21:38

He's only got one colleague who never seems to be there.
There was another customer there yesterday.
I was thinking to call and say just wondering if you want to go for a drink have a think about it and youve got my number already.
He wont have forgotten me in 2 days he remembered us from 5 months ago.
Mixed responses.
I will probably chicken out anyway.

OP posts:
pastaparadise · 21/08/2020 21:40

A guy did this with me years ago and I was surprised but not offended. I'd met him in the pub (friend of a friend) and he knew I worked at the local hospital. Then I was in the office and my secretary put him through on the phone - he'd tracked me down. Would have been romantic if I'd liked him!

I'd wait til next time you're in but only because I'm a coward

Milkshake54 · 21/08/2020 21:44

Go for it! You have nothing at all to lose!

RedIsWhereItsAt · 21/08/2020 21:45

OP DO NOT CHICKEN OUT.

Do you want to live with regrets?

Louise91417 · 21/08/2020 21:47

I wouldnt be brave enough to call him..might find a reason to call into his work...maybe say you have misplaced your bank card and wondered if you had left it there...Hmm

Original poster
Scoopstroop · 21/08/2020 21:52

Maybe I will go back and say just want to make sure you've got my correct number Blush
I dont want to regret anything and I wanted to do something before all this covid nonsense but chickened out so I've only really got tomorrow to get my act together unless wait another 6 weeks.
It might be nothing but I did think he was interested just from the direction of the conversations we had and I'm never interested in anyone.
Someone I met a couple of weeks ago asked me out on facebook and I wasnt creeped out at all. Slightly flattered but not interested and that was fine.

OP posts:
BugCatcher879 · 21/08/2020 21:58

Good luck

Jellybeansincognito · 21/08/2020 22:02

I’d do that op and cheekily add on that you don’t mind if he puts its in his personal phone at the same time, and then leave and say- I’ll look forward to your message!

whiplashy · 21/08/2020 22:03

No don’t do it!!

HollowTalk · 21/08/2020 22:04

I wouldn't. I think if he's interested he'll ask you.

AllAussieAdventures · 21/08/2020 22:06

I think it is OK to ask. I have been asked out by clients occasionally. I thank them, let them know I am married and we both move on.

It isn't harrassment to politely ask someone out. It would be if you didn't accept the answer.

Eatyourbanana · 21/08/2020 22:06

Is this a new barbers? Just Recently opened? Only because one has just opened near me & the bloke is bloody gorgeous 🤣

don’t worry I’m married won’t be asking him out Grin

JustOneLastThing · 21/08/2020 22:08

Go for it OP, life's too short to not take the opportunity

Original poster
Scoopstroop · 21/08/2020 22:09

How would he ask me though?
In front of my son?
With my data that i gave him for track and trace?
I mean he could but I think there is more risk for him to do that, if I wasnt interested he might lose a customer.
I wouldn't be happy with either of those things so the onus is on me to make to move im just not sure how.
I want to ask him out but dont want to be weird or creepy.
Ive been single for about 5 years and if i dont start being pro active it might be 5 more.

OP posts:
nestisflown · 21/08/2020 22:10

I wouldn't. I think if he's interested he'll ask you.

Not true unless he’s completely unprofessional. I wouldn’t dream of asking a client out because it’s unfair to put that discomfort and burden on someone who is paying for you to provide a service for them free from harassment.

Other way round is slightly different though as OP is the client so there is no expectation of professionalism. I wouldn’t wait for him to do it OP because I doubt he will ask you out at work if he’s interested (though if you bumped into him elsewhere he might).

I would go for it to be honest, but face to face!

Confusedismyname · 21/08/2020 22:12

Go for it op.

I’d do it in person thought.

Isol · 21/08/2020 22:15

Call or pop in and say did I leave my sunglasses (or similar) gives you an excuse. Then say can I give you my number in case they show up and add, oh and if you are single and fancy a drink you can use my number for that too...

BrummyMum1 · 21/08/2020 22:19

What’s the worst that can happen if you ask him out? 5 minutes of cringe or 5 years of regret? Just phone him up and say you really enjoyed talking to him the other day and would he like to chat some more over a drink or coffee soon? If you’ve misread it and he says no then it’s been good practice for the next time you meet a nice guy.

MiddleClassProblem · 21/08/2020 22:23

Yes, go for it. If he says no and you feel awkward, he’s just your son’s barber...

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