Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Flip

1 2 ··· 35 36 37 38 39 40

Original poster

To ask the mask police to please PLEASE stop

984 replies

PennyDreadfuI · 19/08/2020 12:58

Another mask thread but I'm not going to apologise because I'm absolutely at the end of my tether with this sort of thing.

I can't wear a mask because I have trigeminal neuralgia and I've lost count of the stares, comments and filthy looks I've had (and yes, I do wear a lanyard, even though I'm not keen on advertising the fact that I have a hidden health condition). I've heard of people not being allowed on buses, being challenged by staff to explain their reason for exemption and being told they can't enter shops despite being exempt (none of which is legal). I've been told I should wear a visor (I can't, and they're next to useless anyway - Scotland have just banned them unless they're worn with a mask), that I should just stay at home (I can't and neither do government guidelines suggest I should), that I shouldn't use buses (I don't drive and can't walk long distances or cycle because I have inflammatory arthritis) and that I'm selfish (I'm not - if I could wear a mask, I would).

I understand this is a contentious issue but please, can people just think for a minute before they judge or comment? Exemptions are there for a reason - those who are sticklers for The Rules should surely accept and respect this one, too. It's awful that people are too scared to go out for fear of what's essentially discrimination.

The pandemic is bad enough by itself - let's not lose our sense of empathy and humanity, too.

OP posts:

Thread gallery

Original poster

PennyDreadfuI · 22/08/2020 12:34

@LillianBland

Just another thing that impacts on women, more than men. Not that vulnerable or disabled men aren’t vulnerable to abuse, but generally of a different type.

Funnily enough it's usually men who give me grief for not wearing a mask, too. And the poster upthread who was filmed was filmed by a man.

I wonder if all these big brave fellows would harass a bloke who was maskless?

OP posts:

Kazzyhoward · 22/08/2020 12:38

Shouldn't those in masks be doing that, too? Why do you assume those who are exempt would not? Do you think we're reckless and selfish?

The SD guidance is either 2m OR 1m plus (ie plus being other such as wearing a mask).

It's not my made up rule - it's the official guidance.

Wear a mask - 1m
Don't wear a mask - 2m

Original poster

PennyDreadfuI · 22/08/2020 12:40

@Kazzyhoward

Shouldn't those in masks be doing that, too? Why do you assume those who are exempt would not? Do you think we're reckless and selfish?

The SD guidance is either 2m OR 1m plus (ie plus being other such as wearing a mask).

It's not my made up rule - it's the official guidance.

Wear a mask - 1m
Don't wear a mask - 2m

I'll happily keep 2m from everyone, as I've said countless times on this thread. It's not my fault if those in masks don't keep 2m from me, however.

OP posts:

Underhisi · 22/08/2020 12:44

The official guidance of 1m + is for businesses and public bodies not for individual members of the public. You don't get to decide to stand closer to strangers because you have a mask on.

Original poster

PennyDreadfuI · 22/08/2020 12:56

I'm really not sure how this 'keep 2m away from me if you're not wearing a mask ffs' thing works. So if I was wearing a mask, you'd be happy to be 1m away from me? Isn't it all a little arbitrary, especially considering that many countries SD rules at the height of the pandemic (when masks weren't advised and were actually not recommended) advised 1m distancing?

If you're wearing a mask you've probably touched your face countless times and have potentially contaminated hands and clothes. So you stay 2m away from me and certainly don't brush up against me (as many in masks seem happy to do).

Like I say, I gladly keep away from you. You keep away from me, too.

OP posts:

Kazzyhoward · 22/08/2020 13:02

I think we should all keep away from each other by as much as possible. I still stand well back, probably more like 3-4 metres where I can regardless of people wearing masks or not.

Trouble is, I can control MY actions, but I can't control the actions of others. I can't stop some arsehole coming up behind me and brushing me to get something off a shelf, or getting too close behind me in a queue.

I'd expect someone who chooses not to wear a mask to be more aware of social distancing and make more effort to keep their distance as it's them who are increasing the risks for those they choose to come into close contact with.

Original poster

PennyDreadfuI · 22/08/2020 13:10

@Kazzyhoward those who are exempt do not choose not to wear a mask. That's the whole point of being exempt. You don't get a choice. You can't wear a mask. Perhaps if people accepted this there would be less judgement and nastiness, and the idea that we're just selfish arseholes who are playing fast and loose with your health would cease to be.

Nobody should be 'more aware' of SD than anyone else. We should all be equally aware of it.

OP posts:

Underhisi · 22/08/2020 13:13

"I'd expect someone who chooses not to wear a mask"

Telling choice of language there.

Noneformethanks · 22/08/2020 13:37

I am not “not choosing” to wear a mask. I can’t wear one. There is a difference and as pp says, telling use of language there that shows your underlying disablist attitude.

doityourselfnow · 22/08/2020 13:44

I think we should all keep away from each other by as much as possible. I still stand well back, probably more like 3-4 metres where I can regardless of people wearing masks or not.

3-4 meters is ridiculous and unobtainable in most indoor situations!

People make mistakes, whilst you're hanging back 3-4 meters from the person in front of you (following your own made up rules) the people behind you are becoming frustrated and your OTT attitude, try sticking to 2 meters and 1 with extra precautions!

People can't wear masks, it's not a choice.

AristotleAteMyHamster · 22/08/2020 14:15

No problem with anyone who can’t wear a mask, although I get annoyed with the people who could but choose not to (who seem to be quite vocal on my local FB page). Sadly there’s no way of telling the difference, and I wouldn’t challenge anyone because, frankly, it’s none of my business.

I’d actually prefer to be around someone not wearing a mask who adheres to 2m social distancing than the idiots who think it’s fine to get within 10cm of you because everyone’s wearing a mask.

I also wish the sunflower lanyards hadn’t been co-opted to mean mask-exempt. I had someone challenge me about wearing a lanyard today because I was wearing a mask... Perhaps the mask police are evolving into the lanyard police?

LillianBland · 22/08/2020 14:53

I agree with all you say, AristotleAteMyHamster

It’s the arses that slabber all over Facebook about their rights and refusal to wear masks, that help cause problems for those that can’t. It gives the mask police an excuse to abuse anyone not wearing a mask for health reasons, because they associate them with the refusers.

WiddlinDiddlin · 22/08/2020 14:54

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Gancanny · 22/08/2020 14:58

if you cannot wear a mask, then you need to limit where you go, what you do, who you see.

Maybe we should just lock exempt people up...? People have a right to fo where they want and do what they want so long as they are acting within the law, it would be discriminatory to expect people to stay home or to limit their activities simply because they are mask exempt.

InDeoEstMeaFiducia · 22/08/2020 15:00

It isn't fun, no ones having any bloody fun, but we all have a responsibility to do our best NOT to spread anything and if you cannot wear a mask, then you need to limit where you go, what you do, who you see.

No, no 'you' don't. Peoples' lives are not, and should not be, circumscribed because of their inability to wear a mask . Thankfully, you don't make 'the rules' because conversely, you could also say the exact same thing to those who are at greater risk of falling seriously ill from Covid, that they should box themselves up as much as possible. Again, this is not the case because we live in a free society. 'We' must abide by the rules the elected government sets, that's it.

People who are disabled by trauma and hidden disabilities are already restricted enough without public shamers trying to make their lives even worse.

Gancanny · 22/08/2020 15:02

sorry no one NEEDS to go to McDonalds or Hobbycraft

One persons frivolous is another persons necessity.

InDeoEstMeaFiducia · 22/08/2020 15:03

I am coming across people in places they definitely do not NEED to be (sorry no one NEEDS to go to McDonalds or Hobbycraft) who glare at you, wave a lanyard and then ignore social distancing!

Oh, the irony! You don't need to be there, either, and it doesn't make you morally superior because you're using a mask. They are not force fields.

WiddlinDiddlin · 22/08/2020 15:09

I wasn't in either hobby craft or mcdonalds, it is possible to be outside these places (I was on my way to the drs) and pass those coming OUT..

I am as I say, exempt, I am limiting where I go because covid will likely kill me, I can't be ventilated but also because I do firmly believe we should all be doing what we can to limit the spread.

Yes, that does mean lots of people can't go very far, and yes, thats shit, its really hard, some people have no choice because they have no one else to rely on, they have to go to work, they have to take care of others..

But those who CAN limit what they do, where they go... should.

Lots of people who would be severely affected or can't be ventiliated are like me, still shielding, still on a self imposed lock down.

Its funny how peoples first reaction is to leap to me being morally superior.. im really really not.. I'd just like to stay alive!

trappedsincesundaymorn · 22/08/2020 15:10

I am coming across people in places they definitely do not NEED to be (sorry no one NEEDS to go to McDonalds or Hobbycraft) who glare at you, wave a lanyard and then ignore social distancing!

Why are you there if, as you say, nobody needs to go....or do you have special rights because you are able to wear a mask?

I am exempt, wearing one does cause my respiratory rate to rise, I struggle to breathe, my heart rate rises

I still wear one - I absolutely appreciate that some people just can't.

If you can wear one you are not exempt..exemptions are for those who cannot.

trappedsincesundaymorn · 22/08/2020 15:10

Bold fail on first paragraph.

Noneformethanks · 22/08/2020 15:11

@WiddlinDiddlin

I'd like to ask those exempt from wearing a mask..

To seriously consider where they go and whether they actually need to go there.

I am exempt, wearing one does cause my respiratory rate to rise, I struggle to breathe, my heart rate rises.

I still wear one - I absolutely appreciate that some people just can't.

But if you can't.. please limit where you go to only that which is totally necessary, that you cannot delegate to someone else, and PLEASE adhere to social distancing.

I am coming across people in places they definitely do not NEED to be (sorry no one NEEDS to go to McDonalds or Hobbycraft) who glare at you, wave a lanyard and then ignore social distancing!

Just lock me up and throw away the key then?

Noneformethanks · 22/08/2020 15:15

I crochet and craft. So I’m not allowed to shop for that. Never mind that it’s good for my mental health and that it stops me self harming. The mask police say I’m not allowed to do that now.

Also not allowed to eat out.

Even though there are legitimate exemptions the mask police know better than the actual,law

Original poster

PennyDreadfuI · 22/08/2020 15:23

@WiddlinDiddlin please refer me to the part of the government guidelines which tells those who are exempt that we must limit where you go, what you do, who you see. I've studied them and picked them apart but nowhere do I remember seeing anything which suggests that those who are exempt must limit their activities, so either I missed it or you're interpreting the rules as you see fit. Which is it?

I would suggest that somebody who's just done a 12 hour shift as a keyworker and is absolutely knackered may indeed need to go to McDonald's. Happily there are anti discrimination laws and government mandated exemptions in place which allow them to do so, whatever the unreasonable demands of someone on an internet forum may be.

And as a pp said - if you can wear a mask, you're not exempt. No conditions automatically confer exemption. You're able to wear one, ergo you can, ergo you're not exempt.

OP posts:

Noneformethanks · 22/08/2020 15:24

So who am I allowed to see then according to the mask police?

I’m meeting a friend on Monday to have a Rishi with my kids to celebrate dd getting to uni. Indoors. Meeting someone outside my family (ANd ds and his partner who live togher) that’s not allowed either.

When am I allowed to see my son? Never?

Where exactly am I allowed to go?

Original poster

PennyDreadfuI · 22/08/2020 15:25

I wasn't in either hobby craft or mcdonalds

So how do you know that the people in there waved lanyards, glared at you then ignored SD?

OP posts:

Flip

1 2 ··· 35 36 37 38 39 40