6 months of being with my kids 24/7 has nearly broken me

[Midlifelights]

I love my kids and I know I am lucky to have a family life but the total absence of personal space and time has nearly broken me.

I get interrupted every single second of the day & my kids (who are 8 & 12 incidentally) seem to have lost the ability to play or entertain themselves - I try to restrict screen time but I find myself using screens more as a way of getting time out.

I feel close to a meltdown to be honest- we do get out every day to parks & stuff but unless we do that, I get no time to do anything even as simple as sending an email or anything without them demanding my uninterrupted attention.

I need to cook, clean, send emails, do life admin. OH in work & then tired so all of this has fallen to me. My lovely DD must have said mummy 300 times yesterday & I spend all my time saying ‘hang on’ while I try to grab 10 mins to do something for myself.

Aibu- I feel close to the edge to be honest

Yep it’s been awful.

Me and DH both trying to work from home. Kids trying to do school work. Not enough physical or personal space. Everyone getting on each other’s nerves.

Can’t wait for school to start. Even the kids are ready.

I hear you OP, longest 6 months of our lives here. I remember sitting 2 months ago crying at the thought of 10 more weeks of this, thinking how can I carry on. I even contemplated splitting up with DP just so I can have time away from kids when he would have them (joke).
It’s been bloody hard on everyone, we have 13 days to go here until school re opens and I for one cannot wait. Like a PP I will be getting some cakes and pigging out in peace and I can’t wait. My toddler isn’t at school but will be at nursery that morning so I can at least enjoy a few hours alone.

Literally the only peace I have had is the drive to work. Hurry up schools I say!!

I remember I used to find the six weeks summer holidays so long and worry how I'd cope...it will never seem long again. One silver lining I guess

I could have written this, I'm close to the edge I have 4 and haven't been at home on my own since March, they're sick of the sight of each other and argue over the smallest things!! I just want a few hours where no one talks to me....... then I feel guilty because I know lots of people have been alone through this who've longed for company or that people have had to work and struggled for childcare so I feel selfish!! My husband has worked throughout it all and had to pick up extra shifts due to work being so busy and I sometimes feel envious of him going out to work because although he's working really hard at least he spends time with other adults!
So to round it up I'm a bitter miserable cow and I'll be spending the first week of term sitting in silence in a house that stays tidy for more than five minutes!!

Totally get you OP. My 5yo is lovely and generally pretty good at occupying themselves. BUT it's just gone on for so long, I've reached the end of what I can give.

I'm a single parent working from home. I'm here physically but mentally I'm just not present. I'm so desperate for time to myself I'll retreat behind my phone. Then feel guilty and sorry for DC.

It's been a shit situation.

I can completely relate. 2 boys 5 and 7. Youngest asd/other additional needs and he's exhausting most days! Eldest talks and talks and talks. So does the youngest too. Eldest can't even go for a pee alone. I'm a single mum and they don't see their dad so school was my only free time from them. Been close to a breakdown many times since March! Saving grace has definitely been screens and playing out on the street now. Roll on September.

6 months? Bloody hell OP I’m glad I’m not where you are! Been 5 months here, I was off for 3 weeks at the start, and DH has been furloughed the rest of the time, I don’t have kids and even I’ve been climbing the walls!

You’re doing amazingly

I too am craving solitude.

Empathy from me too.

I am broken. Close to going under. No mental space at all

Worst of all I feel so guilty for wanting to get away from all of them.

I think we're so close to the end (fingers and toes crossed) we're all beginning to break. Every one of us is a bloody hero.

When schools closed on the 20th March, did you think you'd be able to cope til September? In January would you have considered doing it for even two weeks?

We've done something no other generation has done, and something we just weren't prepared for. And our kids are loved and fed.

My standards have definitely slipped during lockdown but we've survived intact, and that is worth a lot,

for the mum guilt, but personally I refuse to be guilty. I've done my best, and that will have to be good enough.

Don’t expect the schools going back to be a panacea. I’m in Scotland and my 8 and 11 year old have been back for a week and a half. For some reason DH and I feel worse now than ever and the kids behaviour has got even worse.

it feels like all the accumulated stress of lockdown plus the expectation that the stress would end with school starting has blinded me to the crashing realisation that all the normal life/work/school stress is still here but is now amplified as it’s all fucked up with social distancing: masks: anxiety that it’ll all end again. And the pressure to try and rescue our careers now that we have more time. But we’re exhausted and a bit ptsd and still working from home and only have 6 hours a day which is book ended by anxiuos kids socially distanced school run stress and really all I really feel like doing is staring at a wall and weeping

Hopefully we’ll readjust

Threadkiller

I slept for two hours this afternoon...I'm drained

My ds was full of attitude and my dd had a mega tantrum over nothing today. I felt I'd had enough then in the evening they were so sweet and I felt awful for feeling that way

After 6.5 days of school my two are sneezing/coughing today, so prob off school
Tomorrow. Sigh

I have found my people. I feel like I should have nothing to complain about, we are lucky to have enough money, nice house, garden and most importantly we are all healthy but.... I have 3 kids, ages 6 and under and I felt a bit drained before all this happened. To be honest I am just so sick of them (not the baby) and especially my DH. We seem to have hit a rough patch and whilst I'm never ever alone I'm actually very lonely. My kids are fed, mostly happy and know I love them but I'm sick to death of everything being down to me. I wish they would all bog off and leave me alone. Even when school returns I'll have a preschooler home 3 days a week and a baby full time. I'm really looking forward to September but also dreading that there's going to be nowhere to go and nothing to do with the kids. I shout too much, have zero patience and my nerves are shot. I don't even know how this will get better. I know it will but I feel a bit stuck. I think I need to sleep for a week!

I find it well weird that no one is talking about the fact that the schools are already back in Scotland. On the radio, tv and now here too

Mine are age 8/10. We both been working all way through. It's been hell

It’s not the noise, the mess, the constant mum mum mum that have driven me to the brink but the constant touching.

Someone is always bloody touching me.

If I sit in the couch they sit on me or so close they may as well be, if we are playing a board game someone is pressed up against me, if We go out little hands are holding mine, if i try to do some work or sewing someone just needs to give me something very special and hug or kiss me.
Then when they are in bed it’s bloody DH.

I hide in the loo just so no one is touching me for 5 minutes.

I totally sympathise and I feel exactly the same- I have 3 kids similar ages to yours and none have been in school since March. It’s been hellish at times and working from home has been awful. I’ve worked most evenings and weekends to catch up Late into the night.
Your DH needs to help more if you are both working. Why can’t he help if an evening? My DH cooks something simple most nights after work and we share the jobs