If you are overweight, what, in your opinion, made you that way?

[SistemaAddict]

There's been lots of threads recently about weight inspired by the government trying to crack down on obesity yet encouraging us to eat out and posters bemoaning the lockdown lard/pandemic pounds. There has been lots of discussion about the causes of obesity or being overweight due to societal and financial factors but I wanted to ask what posters think made them either overweight or obese because reasons will vary. Certain medications and conditions can cause weight gain and/or make it harder to lose weight and the peri-menopause/menopause doesn't help.

I stopped breastfeeding a year ago and my appetite didn't return to normal after stopping so I gained weight. Then my asthma was bad from October onwards and my ability to go on bike rides was limited. Then lockdown and shielding and my 5 mile school hike up and down big hills went out of the window and I ate too many biscuits and chocolate and would eat in the evening while reading or watching tv. I gained around a stone and that took me into the overweight category.

In June I decided enough was enough and started 16:8 and limited myself to around 1250 calories a day. I bought a fitbit and started using my fitness pal. Both encouraged me to go on walks with the dc and to take more trips up and down the stairs than were necessary to meet my target of 25 flights a day. I stopped eating after dinner, watched my portion sizes and cut out most of the junk I was eating. I'm now a normal weight with a BMI of 24. I'm carrying on with my healthier lifestyle and improved habits but it's hard especially in the evenings when I want chocolate. My aim is to get to a BMI of 23 as that is where I look and feel best.

I don't want this to be a judgemental thread, or for anyone to fat shame posters, I just wanted to share my own reasons for weight gain and ask others' experiences because it's a very individual thing beyond "too many calories in vs calories out" and it can be very complex.

My weight is because when I'm sad, stressed or depressed I turn to chocolate and crisps.
Having said that I don't blame anyone for my weight except me. No one is forcing me to eat too much.

Chronic long term stress and menopause.
I used to be really fit and healthy. Now I'm a stone overweight, unfit, flabby and depressed. If any one has any tips I'd really appreciate them.

Until I was 24 I was 9st. Walking circa an hour per day, to and from train stations.

I gained a stone within 3mths of buying a car. Struggled to loose it.

A few years on I worked away from home eating out 4 nights a week and very quickly gained another stone.

I was then sitting at 11 stone, being very active and diet I managed to loose a stone.

Then worked away again and was back at 11st.
Very slowly, its creapt up to over 12st, gaining a pound or two a year.

I am 55. I was a fat kid, fat teenager, fat adult.

Like it or not their is a genetic disposition to weight. My mum's family are all tall and chunky, my father's family were all short and very round. Not everyone with a genetic dispostion will be overweight. Many other factors come into play.

I drew the short round straw. I didn't have much chance, particularly with a grandmother who had little money and saw food as her way of treating her grandchildren, baked and generally stuffed us with food.
In my 20s and early 30s I did little formal exercise, but I have never driven so walked everywhere and was always reasonably fit.
In my late 30s I joined the gym, cut the carbs and lost weight. I put three stone back on in my late 40s after I adopted my son.
My diet is Ok, not perfect, but I don't eat 10 packets of biscuits day or stuff myself with take aways or drink loads of alcohol. Pre lockdown I was at the gym 3-4 times a week, still don't drive so still walk everywhere. Friday to Sunday I probably cover 8 to 10 miles a day. I have an allotment. I could not be anymore active than I am.
Once its on, its very hard to get off, particularly in middle age, without consigning yourself to a life of misery and constant monitoring of every last mouthful of what you eat.
Telling me to eat less, move more is pointless.
I did lose 2lbs last week, but it was miserable.

I was a really fussy eater (I didn't eat any vegetables until my mid 20s) and my mother does not tolerate fussy eaters. When I went to university, I could eat whatever rubbish I wanted and I did. To excess.

Mine is long and varied. I had puppy fat, so stepfather #2 named me Podge and would use it in public. Mother told me I was plain and fat so I would have to take my (admittedly more attractive) sisters leftovers. Lost puppy fat at 12/13 but then sexually assaulted/ abduction attempt at 13.5. In court the offenders excuse was he had urges and I was so ugly that no one would want me anyway, so he was doing me a favour.

Teenage years my mothers premonition came true in a roundabout way; lost my virginity to my BF of a year, shortly after he broke up with me as he wanted to take my best friends sister to our formal/prom. Stupidly, Dad had paid for a limo for myself and my friends as a birthday gift, and I still him and her in the limo, and the day after, I was shunned as I made everyone feel uncomfortable. I left school early with only my O levels. Shortly after, exBF started pursuing my sister and demanded I give her permission/approval to date him (thankfully her standards are higher than mine and she told him to F off). A dozen or so shit BFs, one terrible fiancée.. Now happily married but have had friends tell me how hot DH is and that he’s out of my league.

Add to this, PCOS, underactive thyroid etc, and an auto immune condition where the treatment side effect is weight gain. So I guess if I’m fat and ugly, I’ll accept it if/when DH leaves me. I know he loves me, but self confidence has never been my strong point.

im a lazy cook and at one point find it easier to eat junk food than a normal meal
im trying to get out of the habit of junk but im lazy enough its so eay to fall back into the habit

Comfort and habits. Chocolate is a nice thing, you don’t have to be hungry to eat it so why not have some with a cup of tea - isn’t that lovely! You can be good tomorrow and it has been hard day. And so on.

PCOS and insulin resistance. I spent far too much time eating 1200 calories a day and not losing any weight. Now I don't eat anything regularly with added sugar or processes foods and limit all carbs.

Almost two decades of anorexia spurred by a DM and DGM who were deathly afraid of gaining weight (and being like their own DM's and Dsis's) and passed on the belief to me that if you weren't underweight you were overweight.

Over two decades of doing 2+ hours of intense exercise (not counting all the walking) every day.

My body gave up about 10 years ago. My metabolism is fucked. My bones are fucked. My muscles are fucked. My idea of what a healthy diet is even supposed to be is massively fucked.

Fact of the matter is, if I actually follow a healthy lifestyle, I will never be a healthy weight. I've fucked myself. I just have to try and make sure I don't do it to me kids.

Medication for chronic pain. I was skinny, then I got ill and piled it on. The meds didn’t work that well anyway. I’d now say being middle aged, sandwich generation carer, food is probably the only pleasure I can get away with enjoying.

I'm not horribly overweight, but definitely weigh more than I should.

One of three, always the shortest and podgiest. Always had a belly that stuck out. Was thin and muscly for a decade then had to combine a crazy workload with looking after elderly parents so no time for the gym and then menopause hit. Hardly eat sweet things and I am vegetarian. I don't eat huge portions. It is what it is.

Emotional eating definitely. If I feel happy I look after myself, exercise lots and eat well and lose weight. If I a fed up I overeat and exercise less. Recently I got down from morbidly obese to just overweight. However the wheel has fallen off again due to outside issues and I am struggling again. The weight has crept back on and I am now on border of obese 2.
It is realky shit.

@SonjaMorgan

PCOS and insulin resistance. I spent far too much time eating 1200 calories a day and not losing any weight. Now I don't eat anything regularly with added sugar or processes foods and limit all carbs.

I have PCOS too and a carb addiction. Fun times.

greed/gluttony/love of delicious food
eating my feelings.
getting a car - didn't have one until I was 30 and that was a good 10lbs on straight away
food as treat/love growing up
perimenopause probably responsible for another 7lb or so.

I was also exposed to anorexia and bullimia as a teen as probably two but definitely one of my siblings had it. I think it affected the whole family as all of us have some issues with food.

I became overweight at about 9 years old when I quit swimming and sports clubs and refused to go anymore. At that point the school bullies discovered me and I became more and more introverted and less willing to engage in any activities.

By the time I was 11 I weighed 11 stone and my mum signed us both up for weight watchers to try to encourage me to lose weight and be healthier. My parents were both petite 5ft 4 and never more than 9stone each.

My eating got worse over the years, snacking constantly and doing no exercise, my mum would cook healthy varied meals and try to get me to join her in a variety of exercises, even paying for expensive highlights instead of an Easter egg to give me a non-chocolate option.

The choices were mine but honestly I made them because I was sad and lonely and bullied. I had very few friends at school and it was a vicious cycle, the fatter I got the worse people treated me.

My weight increased to match my age so by 18 I was 18 stone and I topped out at 18 and a half stone. Since then I've lost small amounts each year without gaining it all back and am now focused in really decreasing it. I'm currently 15 st 10lb down from 16st 9lb at the end of March.

I've learnt a lot about me and how my body reacts to food, the main thing being that I cannot tolerate carbs, so I'm sticking to high fat and protein and have removed bread, pasta, rice and potato completely from my diet. That's led to a 9lb loss so far this month.

I suffer from severe chronic back pain and have had lifelong bouts of depression. Also I've been living on a very low income for years. Without a car or any cash it's been impossible to get to the swimming pool - which is the only form of exercise that isn't very painful.

I was so grateful that I got a social worker last year who obtained PIP and other benefits for me. For a few short months I could get community transport to the leisure centre. The pandemic has put an end to this but it won't be forever. I hope to improve my health.

As a separate issue, in my teens I had a lovely figure but after I was raped I piled on the weight. It took me years to work out that this was a defence mechanism.

Hashimotos disease

Lack of exercise

Too tired to cook

Now I've lost over 2st by upping my exercise and watching what I eat. And having my. Meds stable

I wish it was a simple thing I could point at. I mean, yes the obvious, I got fat by eating more calories than I need, but actually why that became so ingrained.

Day to day - while I exercise, I can't outrun my fork.

I was brought up to clear my plate, and had dysfunctional eating strategies to make that happen (e.g. eat the nastiest first, working your way to the good), which also mean because you want the 'good' stuff in a meal, you force yourself past your full point so regularly, it becomes no more than a whisper. I struggle to this day to leave food and to break this habit.

I eat emotionally on top of that - when I'm bored, lonely, upset. It can be sweets, toast or just peanut butter out of the jar. It's a real self destructive urge.

I'm 1-2 stone overweight - recently lost just over half a stone, but it's very hard to eat little enough to have an effect.

My problem is really just going through menopause and metabolism slowing, along with being so busy with work and childcare that I can't do much structured exercise. I've never been really slim but I was a healthy weight until my 40s, then it crept on. I've realised that to not get seriously overweight/obese I have to eat much, much less which is depressing as I wasn't binge eating or stuffing myself.

It's hard because I can't focus on it properly. I always have to think about food for the kids, what to cook, not appearing to be avoiding food in front of them because I don't want to give out the wrong message, being to busy to cook something separate and healthy for myself, - and being hungry because I'm eating less, being stressed and deciding to have some chocolate / cake etc. I think those things are OK in moderation but it's so so easy to slip back up to the level that makes me gain weight.

When I was younger I could easily control my weight - now I have a lot more understanding of how it can be so hard.

Consuming more calories than I burned off, I guess! In the early days of weight gain (at uni), many of them from beer, which could also be linked to increased consumption of junk food - crisps at the pub, the late night kebab etc.
Also I'm not a very sporty person, so have always had to force myself to do exercise rather than naturally wanting to do it - so haven't done enough given my appetite for food and drink.
Then over the years, all the psychological stuff e.g. sometimes being in denial about weight being an issue. Even now, a few decades on, there are things that are much more important to me, and I don't make much effort to lose weight even though I should.

Cake.

Hope that helps.

It's a mental health thing for me. I exercise 6 days a week, and generally eat a healthy, balanced, unprocesed diet. But I also have anxiety and PMDD, and I frequently go through periods when I struggle to function because of depression and tiredness (because I wake up with nightmares after a couple of hours sleep) and on those days I eat huge quantities of high calorie junk to give me enough energy to get through the day. After a while I feel better, catch up on all the things I didn't do when I was struggling, and am half a stone heavier.

I used to self-harm when I was younger. It's the same thing in many ways, but one is more socially acceptable and compatible with parenthood.