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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

I cannot pass a driving test

84 replies

JillBob · 18/08/2020 17:59

So long story short, I attempted to pass my drive test when I was 17 and failed miserably 3 times. First my driving instructor pushed me too early, 2nd I thought I’d pass and didn’t and third my driving instructor lost interest so I had 8 weeks of no driving before a test and obviously failed...

17 years later I’m here again much to my annoyance (husband pushing it, I have two kids now and I hate my job so driving would probably sort both).

Absolutely love my driving instructor, he’s completely different to the one when I had when I was younger and had made me like driving. Today I had my first test and failed within 10 minutes. I’m so upset. I’m a really competent driver outside of test but I just lose it at test.

Can anyone help me workout what to do?! I’m properly heartbroken today (I feel 17 again and can’t shake it).

How do you pass? I feel like an idiot

OP posts:

Montague01 · 18/08/2020 18:02

I have no advice because I couldn’t even pass the theory, I failed that 3 times and lost heart.

Just be kind to yourself for a little bit, you’ll find the will to try again.

TitianaTitsling · 18/08/2020 18:04

What did you fail on this time? I was 4 times before l passed!

Echobelly · 18/08/2020 18:04

I learned in my early 30s and it took me 5 tests. The silly thing was I only failed the first test on something really easy that I could totally do - I stopped a bit too slowly and rolled over the white lines at some traffic lights because I was being careful not to jam to a stop too quickly! Then it took me ages because it was the winter of lots of snow and there were barely any tests for months. OTOH, I think I was much more ready for road driving by the time I did pass.

maybemu · 18/08/2020 18:05

What did they fail you on?

Hotpinkangel19 · 18/08/2020 18:05

Following because I have my second test tomorrow and I'm the same, just go to pieces. I'm already dreading it.

ShoeJunkie · 18/08/2020 18:06

It took me 4 attempts and some Valium to pass OP!

unknownn · 18/08/2020 18:08

I'm in the same boat! Have a test next Friday after failing 4 times already. If you can drive, I honestly believe it's fluke. My first test I had 0 minors and just one major, instructor said it would've been perfect otherwise. The others have been similar. Whereas my cousin had 4 lessons and passed first time. But he is so awful at driving he's been in 4 crashes since passing I think the key is not to give up, just keep going although it's shit, and eventually you'll get lucky

girlicorne · 18/08/2020 18:09

I was the same I had 5, just keep going and you will get there! I know how disheartening it is, my first one I pulled out of the test centre straight onto a keep clear sign. Failed within the first two minutes!!!

recklessruby · 18/08/2020 18:12

If you're nervous due to the test but a good competent driver normally tell yourself its only a lesson not the test. Have a few drops of rescue remedy (dont know if it scientifically works but I believed it so it took my nerves away).
Dont tell anyone except dh when your test is (less pressure on you).
I failed my first at 18 through awful nerves on a 3 point turn which really upset me as they were the thing I did easily but on the test i hit a kerb.
Had to go back into school with the fail slip and cried.
So next time a few months later I didnt tell anyone I was taking it, drop of rescue remedy, 10 mins into test on emergency stop i was sure i was too quick and skidded a bit so carried on thinking i d failed and planning to rebook.
Probably drove more naturally due to that as I passed.
Just tell yourself you can do it, dont pressurise yourself by putting time limits on it or telling anyone.

CharlieSays13 · 18/08/2020 18:13

I failed 4 times because I just fell apart during the test, drove my instructor mad because he knew I could do it. I happened to mention to my GP during a completely unrelated appointment and she told me she had been the same and prescribed me beta blockers. Worked a treat, it may have even been the placebo effect but it worked, I sailed through that test. Keep going and maybe speak to your GP. Good luck

QuarantineDream · 18/08/2020 18:14

3 theories + 4 practicals here.

What finally helped me was printing off all the possible test routes and trying to visualise driving them and, erm, tapping. https://www.healthline.com/health/eft-tapping

CatRamsey · 18/08/2020 18:14

Just keep practicing. Have extra lessons on the run up to your test. If possible, have your lessons at the same time of day and book your test for that time of day too so that traffic is consistent if you know what I mean?
Do you have your own car? Or could you practice with your DH in his car? I found having my own car and practicing everyday before the test really helped.

It sounds like you're a confident driver from what you say and have probably just got unlucky. I hated learning to drive and it took me ages and all my friends were passing and I just couldn't do it! But I did in the end on my third attempt, you've just got to persevere.

for you though, I understand that horrible feeling when you fail!

Good luck for the next one

Fictionlady · 18/08/2020 18:14

There’s an audio book called Pass Your Driving Test by Glenn Harrold- has a hypnotherapy session at the end. Really helped with me with my nerves. Good luck!

Northernsoullover · 18/08/2020 18:15

Oh God don't take valium (not that you can get it) if you do have any benzo's lying around just don't! I took 5 tests but I would have gone on to 6, 7 however many it took because I knew I could drive. I just had terrible nerves. I took beta blockers (they don't make you drowsy) for my 4th. I still failed
because of a pigs ear of a manoeuvre but I still skipped away happy because I knew I'd pass eventually as the nerves had vanished. Passed 5th time.

Original poster

JillBob · 18/08/2020 18:17

Thank you! I failed on clearance... I knew I definitely was no near any parked cars to my left but the test instructor decide to push the when to the left. I was so disheartened. Got back and my driving instructor said he was known to be “jittery and ready to get involved’ and that her hadn’t passed a single one of his students for at least 12 months’. He’s had lots pass so clearly not the instructor. Other than that I had 2 minors

OP posts:

EhUp · 18/08/2020 18:18

You CAN pass the test OP!

What happened when you were 17 is history so I would discount it entirely.

Keep practicing and get another test booked in as soon as is possible

Original poster

JillBob · 18/08/2020 18:18

Sorry wheel not when

OP posts:

vanillandhoney · 18/08/2020 18:19

Why did you fail?

Apparently eating a banana beforehand helps! I ate a banana, didn't drink any caffeine (in case I got the jitters), took four Kalms tablets and picked a good time - apparently just after school run/rush hour is the best time to go out.

I also read that if you have long hair, tying it up in a ponytail is helpful as it means the instructor can see you turn your head when you check your mirrors

anicebag · 18/08/2020 18:21

Beta blocker before test

Branleuse · 18/08/2020 18:24

I passed 6th or 7th time

OneMoreLight · 18/08/2020 18:26

Could you appeal that at all? It sounds like it's not a big thing to fail on?

I did a few tests when I learnt, eventually I booked one for 8 on a Saturday morning in the hope of less traffic on the roads (I also chose a Saturday when there was no football match on as the test routes can go near the stadium)

gemdrop84 · 18/08/2020 18:27

It took me three attempts over the last couple of years as a mature driver. Stick at it op, it is absolutely soul destroying but you will get there! I think by my third test I just thought sod it, can't be arsed with this, it's not the end of the world if I don't pass. I ended up a little more relaxed than I had been previously. I passed with 5 minors even though I was adamant I'd failed.

Changedmynamelots · 18/08/2020 18:28

I’m a great driver, passed advanced driving courses etc but couldn’t pass my driving test... 7th time it took me! My nerves just got the better of me... honestly you will get there... doesn’t make you a bad drive just tests are horrid!

Jesusweptagain · 18/08/2020 18:28

I passed third time. I was a very competent driver but fell to pieces on my 1st test- my leg wouldn't stop shaking. I think it's a combination of wanting it so much & driving with a stranger. In the end I took Kalms for a week before my test- didnt bother with the lessons immediately before & sailed through it. Sometimes it is just your luck though! The time I passed a really tricky roundabout was closed due to an accident so I went a different route & it was so much easier. You'll get there - don't give up!

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 18/08/2020 18:30

6 times for me... and I've happily driven for 30 years now. It was so stressful and upsetting at the time to fail those tests but it doesn't matter a whit now (even the one accident I had with the examiner in the car).

You'll pass OP, maybe not this time or the next but you will if you keep at it.

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