to wish that pushy parents would stop pretending to be religious in order to get a place for Lily at the faith school?

[Caroline1852]

If these schools are "better" it is because parents are clamouring for places, thereby artificially raising the standards. Left to their own, the number of faith schools would dwindle dramatically. There are nearly 5,000 C of E schools, most of them oversubscribed, yet bottoms on church pews are falling (save for a lot of red-faced couples and their 10 year olds). I have nothing against faith schools by the way.
Grrrr it's that time of year again!

have got around guitar-embarrassment by going high church CofE. plenty of incense, latin, furrowed brows and not a sandal/sock combo in sight.

IBS - You say it is knife wound county primary. Well, presumably they take their knives home with them these kids at the other local school?

I know Caroline .
But there's no easy answer to trying to shield your DC from all this awful, tragic stuff as much as you can.

You should try being in a church with drums, and a real wannabe worship leader with a keyboard. You softies wot just has trouble with when to genuflect haven't lived..

DW doesn't have the same vocal objections to church that I do. If we lived in an area where we had to go to church to get the children into a decent school (thankfully we don't), how would it be perceived if a mother with two children came along every week with no sign of the dad? Would people assume he was off the scene, that he couldn't drag his lazy arse out of bed on a Sunday, that he was an atheist, or would it just not matter? And how would that affect the letter from the vicar?

Just curious really. We'll never have to do it for school, but DW has sometimes taken the children to friends' churches on her own for special occasions.

nospeak

I am in a singularly foul mood today and it was largely contained, however the one thing really guaranteed to set me off is someone typing something hackneyed about full moons and chill pills. Duck or you'll get my wrath

IBS - Those things that you describe, knives, guns, etc exist within your local comminity not just in the poor schools in the area. If you do not really "live" in your community - what is the point of living there?

I take the children to Mass without dh, because I'm a Catholic and dh isn't. The priest assumes, doubtless, that I'm a Catholic and dh isn't. Dur.

And for the record I go because we're Catholics, not because I want to blag places in the best local schools. Ds goes to an RC primary whose SATs results are significantly lower than nearby non-church schools. Go figure. We're not all hypocrites, you know.

No idea what you're on about hmc - but rest assured your name alone is enough to make me tremble

(that's the rather transparent plan)

cackles evilly

Don't "dur" me, it's a genuine enough question! And I never said you were all hypocrites.

caroline - maybe some people live in certain areas other than by choice. Just a thought.

Caroline -
I work within the public sector actually in my local community. I am in a face-to-face roll in people's homes. I shop locally. I am friends with neighbours in my block.
Ditto DH.

I find this really hard. I'm not proud of what I do.

Well it's not unknown for Catholics to marry non-Catholics that covers probably over half the kids in the RC schools mine have been in. What did you think the priest would think that you'd somehow get a spiritual black mark for marrying an unbeliever? Sheesh.

frogs, ey ey calm down.
I wondered how it would be perceived, that all. If it would be seen as "odd". And if people doing it just for the school might be asked trenchant and probing questions if only one parent came along.

Its all academic anyway.

UQD - I think your DW has secretly got God. In answer to your Q about only one parent turning up for church. I believe this qualifies.

Oh, and most people are bloody nice! It is a minority that are involved in the horrid gangs, but it is a significant one.

Don't worry. I am used to DW being wrong about all sorts of things.

I'm married to protestant.

V. common.

And we divvy up our attendance, to everyone's satisfaction. But we're not after any school places. Don't know what the reaction would be if we were.

YABU. As long as I pay for these schools, I'll want access to them for my daughter.

The whole system is a disgrace and if I have to pretend to be religious to get access to a service that I paid for, then so be it.

Oh well my v catholic mate's wife (well he family is I see no evidnence of him going to chruch!) had to convert before they got married why is that then?

CD - She could have married him in a Catholic Church by merely (!) agreeing to giving any children over to the faith. But it's a bit like Pyramid selling, the more people you convert the less you have to go to church (it is OK with the priest). If you convert a dozen people you no longer need to bother with confession.

puts on record that she is always affected by the psychology behind handlemecarefully's name

Margoandjerry
You also pay for special needs schools, and young offenders' units and Welsh language schools. It increases choice, not always for you but it increases choice. What a selfish attitude.

I pay for prisons but I don't want to use the facilities