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Original poster

My in laws just gifted me scales for my birthday

422 replies

Lsquiggles · 11/08/2020 10:51

It's my birthday and I feel absolutely shit after opening a present from my in laws... Fucking scales.

No matter how hard I've tried with them they've always made it clear they don't like me that much, this is just the lowest blow.

They're meant to come over on Saturday and I don't know how I'm meant to bite my tongue.

OP posts:
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5
CareBear50 · 11/08/2020 12:01

OP that is aWful

If it makes you feel any better my MIL bought me a laser kit for my chins hairs one Christmas!

Purplecatshopaholic · 11/08/2020 12:02

They sound a delight. And of course it was malicious! I personally would not bother with, or see them again - it’s your OHs problem, let him deal - life is too short!

CaveMum · 11/08/2020 12:03

Why would you facilitate a relationship between them and your daughter just because she is their only grandchild? “Blood” is not an excuse to behave however you like, if they can’t show respect to the mother of their grandchild then they can sod off!

Children pick up on the tiniest things, allowing toxic people to be around them just because they are “family” only serves to show them that “family” can treat each other badly.

nanny3 · 11/08/2020 12:04

boring salad on Saturday for them and no cake or biscuits

Letsgetbizzy · 11/08/2020 12:04

Can you ask them for the receipt? Say sorry its nothing you want or need (have a perfectly good/better pair already) and you'd rather buy something useful (like fucking cake) and you wouldn't want them to have wasted their money?

Kantastic · 11/08/2020 12:06

Give them the scales back at Christmas and one of those herbal detox kits each.

Whenever you have a spare moment during the day, hide your face behind a copy of Dealing with Toxic People, if you want to hammer the message home.

MostlyHappyMummy · 11/08/2020 12:06

lyralalala is spot on with her post

Letsgetbizzy · 11/08/2020 12:08

When I was 30 my mum bought me Carol Vorderman's weight loss book (I had asked for it) and a free pedometer from McDonalds.....

And NOTHING ELSE... to say I was gobsmacked is something else!!! MY 30th...

NameChange84 · 11/08/2020 12:10

So incredibly rude and hurtful.

You must tell them that this was an offensive gift and you are very hurt and as a result don’t feel you can see them this weekend. And send the scales back to them.

Nymeriastark1 · 11/08/2020 12:10

@TeddyIsaHe

What knobs! I’d get them a burial plot for Christmas.
^^ please please please do this and tell us their reaction 😂
Cosmos45 · 11/08/2020 12:10

@Isthisnothing

I wouldn't play any games. I would send back the scales and say "I don't know how to not be offended by this present. Please do not come on Saturday."
This - I wouldn't mess around with any other niceties.
ktp100 · 11/08/2020 12:11

@LSquiggles Can I just clarify - were you gifted kitchen scales or bathroom scales?

A lot of posts seem to be equating the gift to other boring appliances (ironing boards etc) which works for kitchen scales (although I might take it as a pop that they think I don't cook from scratch enough) but if they were bathroom scales that's a whole new ball game! In that case I'd be off out on Saturday and if DH had anything to say about it I'd make it clear that if I'm put in a room with his Mother the word BITCH is highly likely to come out of my mouth. At the very least!!

Mummyoflittledragon · 11/08/2020 12:12

@TeddyIsaHe

What knobs! I’d get them a burial plot for Christmas.
Class! As has been pointed out, that’s too expensive. What about an urn? This ones only £55. Bargain.
My in laws just gifted me scales for my birthday
Roselilly36 · 11/08/2020 12:13

Happy Birthday. How rude of them, honestly what an inappropriate gift, re-wrap and give to MIL at Xmas 😜

BlogTheBlogger · 11/08/2020 12:14

I don't know how I'm meant to bite my tongue

He doesnt think they have done it in a malicious way

I have to be here as DD gets upset

They are being given a get out in every which way. I hope you will say something, but I fear you wont. And even more, your husband wont. You are both setting the tone for them to bring your DD down with their future comments on her

Didkdt · 11/08/2020 12:15

I'd ask for the gift receipt on Saturday as you don't need new scales
I would also make a point of being out on Saturday for a big part of the day.

AfterSchoolWorry · 11/08/2020 12:16

@Lsquiggles

I'd happily go out and leave them to it but my daughter gets upset when they're here because she doesn't know who they are as they hardly see her Envy < not envy
Bring your daughter with you. Fuck them.
ekidmxcl · 11/08/2020 12:17

You need to put a stop to this shit now or it will only carry on. My MIL was a lovely woman so it’s not about her but I have dealt with enough shitty people to know it does not stop, no matter how graciously you brush shitty behaviour under the carpet. You must deal with it.

So my suggestion is for you and your baby to go out and not be there for the duration of their next visit. Your husband needs to let them into the house, sit them down and explain that what they’ve done is hurtful and unacceptable. They should be allowed to coo over the baby as though nothing has happened. That body grew and nourished that baby and your dh needs to explain this to them.

If you don’t tackle this head on now, this will be what things are like forever.

Brefugee · 11/08/2020 12:17

I think it's very pass-agg at best and nasty and mean at worst.

You know your relationship with them, OP, are they pass-agg? have they ever mentioned your weight? is it a "thing" with them, or weight generally.

In essence scales are only an appropriate gift when they have been asked for.

In your shoes I'd tell my husband that he's either missing something or he's in on it. And then tell him that your reply to them will be I wouldn't play any games. I would send back the scales and say "I don't know how to not be offended by this present. Please do not come on Saturday."

If he/they insist on the visit, leave them to it. Happy belated birthday, OP Cake Flowers Wine

stayathomer · 11/08/2020 12:17

Can I just clarify - were you gifted kitchen scales or bathroom scales?

That didn't even occur to me, I just assumed a body weighing scales. yanbu OP. If it isn't food weighing scales say to them it was a mean present.
If it makes you feel any better my MIL bought me a laser kit for my chins hairs one Christmas!
I'm a fussy eater and a rubbish cook and I was given a tiny a cook book of asian food for christmas. I don't think so little thought (or maybe so much!) has ever been put into a present!

houselikeashed · 11/08/2020 12:17

I think definitely a very very low calorie meal. Make it as horrible as possible. The apologise for the meal by saying something like…"you know, you getting me those weighing scales made me realise I have to try and lose weight."
Celery soup, followed by salad with eggs but no dressing. Serve them tiny tiny portions.

When they've gone, you can eat properly. Keep this up every time they visit you.

ekidmxcl · 11/08/2020 12:18

That should have said: should not be allowed to coo over the baby as though nothing happened.

And don’t warn them in advance!

Coffeecak3 · 11/08/2020 12:19

I agree go out with dc and let your dh deal with their behaviour.

ittakes2 · 11/08/2020 12:21

Cancel Saturday. Please don’t bite your tongue - set your boundaries on what is ok and what is not ok and let them know it.

isadorapolly · 11/08/2020 12:22

Your daughter will be fine if her dads there with her! Go out on your own for a bit, leave them to it!