To wish my friend wouldn't keep sending me photos from her holiday while we're stuck in?

[MacduffsMuff]

DH is having an operation on Thursday. We were told that we had to completely self-isolate as a family (5 of us) for two weeks prior to his operation (we are in a hot spot). That's fine - he needs the operation and we'll all be relieved for him to have it. Keeping a 17 year old, 13 year old and a 12 year old in hasn't exactly been a ball but they've done it and only a few more days to go.

Friend is on holiday at the moment. She sends me about 6/7 photos every single day with 'isn't this beautiful, bet you wish you were here/ha ha ha sorry you're stuck in and we're living the life of riley' etc etc. All of the same ilk. Now, to be clear, I am not in any way resentful of the fact they are away on holiday (it's a very different holiday from one we would choose anyway) but in normal circumstances, she would never send me a million photos daily, it's purely because we are isolating and can't go out. It's actually pissing me off now because we're all fed up and it just seems a bit ... mean. I messaged her back yesterday with a cheery 'looks fab - maybe save the rest until you get back since we've all got cabin fever, have a lovely time'. But today I've had 3 of the beach, two of their lunch and I'm expecting more. It's a bit shit isn't it?

Reading title I was going to say you were being a little au and I'm meeting a friend tomorrow to hear all about her holiday.

Mine was cancelled and I was glad.

Hers was cancelled and she decided to go to turkey instead.

But actually under those circumstances she's a prize tit!

Love the middle finger emoji as a reply but get the feeling she's someone who would just turn it round that your being unkind and pathetic.

I'd send something more blunt than your original reply

"I hinted that sending a family isolating for 2 weeks due to Covid and surgery during a U.K. heatwave was insensitive. You didn't take the hint. So how about you think about what you Turkey want to achieve by sending us those pics - knowing we are facing isolation and then nervousness as a loved one has surgery - when you have never ever sent me 8 pictures a day when you've on holiday before?"

@MacduffsMuff

I don't think she realises how it's coming across - she suffers really badly with anxiety and I'm the last person to make that worse for her but I really wish she'd stop!

I suffer from anxiety and have a friend in exactly the same position as you and your family and the last thing I would fucking do is send her photos of me in the park, let alone on holiday.

I would send her back, do you mean to be such a twat? Its not funny cut it fucking out

@Thehop

“I’m sure you meant it as a joke to start with but we’re actually having a really hard time at the moment. Luckily I have some really supportive friends but you’re not really helping with the dogs and pictures. I’m glad you’re having fun but can I wait to hear about it when we’re on the home stretch and daves got the all clear please? See you when you get back. X”

This ^

she suffers really badly with anxiety

I think she suffers more with complete lack of self awareness rather than anxiety. Or YOU are suffering with her lack I should probably say

A PP put it succinctly - "enough with the photos - we are having a tough time here" and leave it at that

Tell her to fuck off. She’s just being nasty.

I hope the operation goes well.

@Sparkletastic

I'd just answer honestly - 'enough with the photos - we are having a tough time'

This

@InTheWings had the best reply

Or just say “I am the wrong audience for this at the moment and getting a bit sick of it. Surely you can enjoy yourself without rubbing it in?”

She sounds like a prize arse.

I'd actually tell her she's being incredibly insensitive. Remind her that your DH is in a lot of pain and she knows you're all staying in so he can have medical treatment that will hopefully sort him, and her response is to flaunt her holiday in your face? What kind of friend does that?
Please. ask her.

reply " I'm blocking you , bitch" and do it.

Don't open the next message, she'll see it's unread and hopefully get the hint. What a cow!

Tell her clearly that whether she intends it or not, the joke has long passed its sell-by date and now it is coming across as nasty and malicious, and if she really does care about you and your family and means no harm, she will stop doing it now. If she carries on, you'll have your answer and can block and dump without further ado.

@Chloemol

Just text her back and tell her, Sod her anxiety. Just text her can you please stop sending these pictures, I have a very ill husband, as you know we are all isolating and you are now upsetting me with your goady behaviour

Unless you call her out she will continue. She is also no friend

Send this. It would really piss me off. She is having fun in her self proclaimed pissing contest, which you cannot win.

@ShebaShimmyShake

Tell her clearly that whether she intends it or not, the joke has long passed its sell-by date and now it is coming across as nasty and malicious, and if she really does care about you and your family and means no harm, she will stop doing it now. If she carries on, you'll have your answer and can block and dump without further ado.

Or this

'Wish you were here?'

Answer: are you kidding me, we're having the worst time, dh going into hospital Thursday.' It's the truth! Let her know! And take care and hugs op

Send a message back:

Boiling hot, can’t go out. Dh in terrible pain, kids arguing. Feel like killing myself.

Then she’ll stop.

Just block her while she is way and then send her loads of pictures of DH's hospital 'vacation', gorier the better. Bonus points if you can mimic her photos. Eg: picture of drip captioned "lovely lunch today", "sunshine reflected of the mortuary chimney" 🤣🤣🤣

Although to be honest, I'd just forget to unblock her.
Who needs enemies with friends like that?

Also, all the best to DH for his op.
Very unmanly

Anxiety or not she is being a big chump.

It’s her not you.

I’d do this too

‘I'd just answer honestly - 'enough with the photos - we are having a tough time'’

I'd block her, maybe (only maybe) unblock after DHs op. You've asked her to stop, she hasn't, not much of a friend.

Hope your DHs op goes well

Stop replying. She'll soon realise she's being a dick.

That is just plain nasty of her. Reply with 'hi goady friend, your photos bore me senseless and I would rather boil my own head than have to look at another picture'.

Hope DH operation goes well.

OK I've message back - photo of dinner in a beautiful restaurant by the sea appeared about 20 mins ago. 🙄

'Looks beautiful, would love to see your other pics but can you please keep them til you get back and Mr Macduff's had his op. We're all starting to go a bit loopy being stuck in and they're making me feel worse (jealous cow eh?) 🤣. Have a great time and see you when you get back.'

Does this sound ok? It could go either way with her to be honest and I could have been more blunt but I'm a horrendous people pleaser. I've sent it now anyway so we'll see.

Thanks for all the good wishes for DHs op, I'll be so relieved when he's had it. 😊

For someone who apparently suffers really badly with anxiety, she doesn't seem to care all that much about upsetting you, does she?