GP buying sweets!

[Awkwarddough]

I know this has probably been discussed before. But yesterday we went for a picnic at the zoo with my dad and my DS (18 months).

At one point I gave DS a mini chocolate chip cookie, just one, and at the same time my dad gave him a whole bag of foam shrimp and bananas. I took them off him straight away and gave him one of the sweets after his cookie which my dad scoffed at.

We stopped for a cup of tea and DS was happily eating apple and pear slices and raisins, and my dad pushed a giant gingerbread man under his nose. Again I took it from him straight away and broke the head off and gave him that. When I put the rest away my dad got a second gingerbread man out for himself which he waved in front of DS the whole time.

We’re seeing him again tomorrow and when we left to zoo he said to DS ‘I’ll bring more sweets for Sunday’

I really don’t mine him having the odd sweet and treat especially on days out, but we’re trying to teach him that they don’t have a higher worth than his other snacks or food. And I don’t want him to be having snacks from us then my dad pushing snacks on him too.

WIBU to tell my dad to stop giving him treats and if he has treats for him to give them straight to me and I will give them to him so I know he’s not doubling up on snacks?

Also how’s best to tel him? 😂

TL:DR how do I tell my dad not to give DS sweets

"It's really nice of you to buy sweets for DS but I'm trying to limit his sugar intake". Be direct and honest. Let him scoff if he wants, it's your DS not his. My MIL acted as though me not letting baby DD1 have chocolate was some serious deprivation and that she'd never get over the trauma

@beepbeepsheep thanks. I guess direct is the answer. My dad isn’t very good at listening, or at understand other points of view. But it’s really playing on my mind today :(

I agree with the direct approach. I'm extremely conflict averse, particularly with my mother, but I was exhausted the other day and when the chocolate came out AGAIN I bluntly but politely said 'I wish you wouldn't give chocolate every time' and she took it on board. She also thinks her GC are deprived! But they get plenty enough sweets etc, IMO anyway! Good luck!

My dad has no boundaries either OP, so you're going to have to be firm.

Tbh raisins are not ideal for children’s teeth so I’d cut them out first of all.

Just tell your dad

Just say no. There needn't be awkward skirting around it. "He's just had a cookie, I'll save the sweets for another time".

Raisins and chocolate chip cookies are really bad for teeth this young. I’d stick to fruit for a while, no need for sweets.

Just be direct.

“No sweets though please I’m really trying to keep his diet healthy”

@Thehop
*Just be direct.

“No sweets though please I’m really trying to keep his diet healthy”*
Don’t really think the op can use this suggestion when she’s giving her child chocolate chip cookies (which are just as bad) and sugary dried fruit.

Yes I know I was giving him a cookie, one of the tiny lunchbox pack ones. But part of my point is, if I knew my dad had bought him a gingerbread man I wouldn’t have given him the cookie, he could have had a bit of the gingerbread man. We were on a rare family day out, I’m not against giving him treats when we’re having special days, it’s just the way my dad gives him it, and then I end up pressured into giving him twice as many treats as I would have

I only came on here to find out why your local Dr. was buying illicit candy!

I think a little conversation is needed with the giver of the sweets and biscuits, that's all it takes. Some grandparents think it's the done thing to treat little ones with choc and sweets, it makes them happy !!

Relax.Going to the shop with my Grandpa to choose sweets was one of my favourite childhood memories. You're being very precious.

I only came on here to find out why your local Dr. was buying illicit candy!

Me too!

So it is okay for you to feed your DS crap, but not his GF?

It rather depends on how often you see your dad and he gives your DS treats. I would tell dad that he is only little so a whole bag of sweets or a whole gingerbread man is too much. if you don't see him often, if I were you, I would let my dad have the pleasure of giving small amounts of treats to my son ...and you not give any.

I didn't get loads but have fond memories of my now-deceased nan giving me sweeties or fruit and cream.

I understand where you're coming from here OP. My mother is the same and seems to think its her right and duty to be able to do as she wishes and override my rules and suggestions all because she is a grandmother. I would just be firm in this case and explain you dont want sweets and treats doubled up so you don't want them given to your DS. I would continue to do as you are in terms of editing what your Dad does give him to ensure he isn't having anything you don't want him to. Good luck.

@snickettylemon Me too! [blush
]

I, too, thought it was about the Doctor . (Mine would buy sweets, I reckon.)

I like other posters genuinely thought your doctor bought you sweets

Just say 'please can you stop giving sweets to Jeff' and see if it works. You can explain why if asked.

Also don't feed him sweets etc in front of your dad as that gives a mixed message.

Is your toddler really called Jeff?

I have happy memories of my grandad giving me a sweet when I saw him, but he had a bag and use to let me choose one and put them away for the next visit.

I wager there are no toddlers called Jeff!

Oh god - a bag of sweets once in a blue moon isn't going to kill him. Chill

Totally thought you'd spied your family doctor buying sweets and this was going to be a thread about medical professionals undermining Boris's anti-obesity drive.

As it stands YANBU