To lie on CV to get a job

[arrivedbysaucer]

I haven't worked since 1999 due to mostly being unsuccessful at interviews and if I have been offered jobs I usually get fired as soon as the employers realise I have no organisation skills, time awareness, no ability to focus or complete tasks or attention to detail or in fact attention for anything.
I take medication for inattentive ADHD but the problem is I also have social anxiety because of this, which I have had cbt for but found most of this to be about self acceptance which I feel I have accepted myself and how I'm not the same as everyone else but it's not acceptable by everyone else to be the way I am so not very helpful, I'm also very socially awkward.

If I was to write the above on a CV it's almost certain I would not be invited in for an interview so would I be unreasonable to lie on my CV and say I can do all of those things when really I can't just to get the job and if asked for examples in an interview to just invent things?

Social anxiety is a fear of being judged which is exactly what an interview is, someone judging you so it's difficult but If I don't lie about who I am and waste employers time and resources I will get sanctioned by the job centre.

My youngest is turning 3 soon and I will then be expected to look for work as dh is on minimum wage.
My eldest is 20 now so I've been a SAHM for most of my life so have no experience or qualifications as my school grades were F's and
G 's and I failed at college.
I have two sons 2 and 20 the eldest lives with his fiancée so I just have the little one at home now.

Do I have much choice but to lie if I ever want to get an interview?

I don’t actually agree that volunteering will give you more current experience, in my experience and that of many others I know, companies don’t take people who have volunteered seriously any more, mostly because everyone does it. Also, you’re in an employer’s market so they will likely be more inclined to hire someone with up to date experience.

I mentioned volunteering to build on her skills which sound quite limited at the moment, and her confidence, as she's been out the market for over 20 years. It could be really difficult to find a job to build these skills at the moment so finding voluntary work could be a bit easier so there's something to work on in the mean time.

I have supervised a number of volunteers, many of whom came to us from university through to long employment gaps for various reasons, the differences from the start to the end of their time with us were astounding. It can never be a bad thing. The heritage sector, and I'm sure others, is built on volunteers and many start that way, most have to to get a foot in the door. So it's not true to say no companies will employ volunteers.

I can't see what you're advising here, don't bother volunteering but you don't have up to date experience any way, so what, give up?

@AlternativePerspective I got a job through volunteering so it is possible, I had also been out of work for a very long time - There are great volunteering opportunities out there.

@Climbingallthetrees

You need to think about what sort of work you are capable of doing. There’s no point lying to get a job and then getting sacked because you aren’t able to do the job. It sounds like customer service or office roles are just aren’t going to work for you. Have you tried factory work? Farm work? Cleaning?

Factory work (on a production line) would be absolute torture for ADHD and I say this as someone who has it and (briefly) worked in one.

OP I'd consider a job where you are not stuck in one place all day, like a delivery person. Access to work can help with equipment, adjustments etc

I think you need to find different work that fits better with your natural strengths; from your previous post I'm wondering if computers don't sit well with you and perhaps a job that involves more moving around might be better suited?

Why lie? You don’t need to mention medical things until interview, and even then I’m not sure you legally have to - employers can’t discriminate against you either way but they will if you mention it Some applications state you can get a guaranteed interview under dd act, so you could mark this, then they will know prior to interview ... BUT , being out of work so long, why not try some courses to brush up in some skills?? Speak to local council run job seeking initiatives, even some banks help with this - look online at Lloyd’s tsb. But maybe even free inline courses at home- this also shows willingness and eagerness during interview stage! Good luck.

It sounds like you need something very structured and process driven to help you. So as above - something where you will not be interrupted/have to remember things.

So factory work, process line, pot-washer in a cafe or working on a checkout. Though it may be best to avoid customers if you can (can be interupt-y (technical-term). It may be dull and repetitive but it would build your experience up and the repetitive nature of it would surely be better than forgetting stuff/failure and being fired?

Can you speak to your work coach and explain your concerns so they can help you with training etc?? Maybe office jobs just aren't for you and they could help you find something that fits you better??

I’m sorry to be brutal but you can’t lie. Your referees won’t be able to lie for you, and setting up a web of deception isn’t the best way to start a working relationship, especially if, from what you say, it’ll be discovered very quickly.

I agree. Why go through the process of recruitment, only to be sacked as soon as you get caught out. It will cost that employer a lot of money and won't help you.

I think the suggestion of getting some volunteer work is a good one. As is setting your sights on jobs that don't require the level of administration you find hard to deal with. You should be looking for a job that utilizes the skills you have, rather than lying about the skills you don't.

The disability discrimination act was abolished in favour of the (much watered down) equality act.

However, some companies subscribe to the disability confident scheme which guarantees interviews to candidates who meet the minimum criteria. However recent experience has shown me that this isn’t worth the paper it’s written on either as, having been interviewed under the scheme, (by a public sector organisation) and offered the job, it transpired that the system couldn’t be made accessible despite the fact they didn’t involve all agencies who could have been involved, and the offer was withdrawn having decided there were no other jobs in the same organisation which I could do. I am currently in communications with them to enquire as to where that leaves them in terms of the disability confident scheme as they clearly will have to exclude any candidate who has the same disability as myself. They haven’t yet come back to me.

Don't lie just take small step to making your self feel better.

Look for some volunteer work, do some basic online training. Find a local provider of Functional skills courses, they should be free.

You can do this. Take small steps, each one counts.

If you like audio books try The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k. My local library has it.

No, have a goal on several types jobs that suit you. TBH restaurant work is often multitasking and keeping remembering things, unless you love it, needs constant concentration. Instead what about something ultra-structured and where you are prompted into action.
If you can do volunteering and get confidence back. If in something you are interested in, even better.
My DB did outdoor woodland repairs. My DSIL did charity shop (likes fashion and learnt till). Another DSIL did and still does (even though now got a job in health) St Johns ambulance.
Being a SAHM you probably are using lots of skills but don't credit them. I bet the anxiety is stopping you from getting help. Do you ask, then let them "explain" and then glaze over and not take it in. It is ok to go through step by step, in free time watch others or take some time to practice /rehearse parts of the job.

Sorry to be blunt, but it is hard to see why anyone would employ you, particularly at the moment when there will be plenty of competent others looking for employment. What benefit could you bring to any organisation?

What job do you think you could do? The delivery option seems the most feasible

Will they need a reference.
I'd go for volunteering work firstly to build your confidence.
You might get a community based job from it. Volunteering a few hours a week ill take the pressure of the boss off you.
What about child minder if your good with DC you can do it from home.

Definitely not check outs. I did it while I was thinking of what I wanted to do next having left a middle managers role after 30 years. Its not as easy as it sounds.

I also agree with Tricky. It needs to be a very simple role with no distractions.

I agree with notheragain4 that volunteering is a great idea. Pick something you’re interested in though. You could start by looking on do-it.org/ or seeing if there is a local volunteering centre. www.ncvo.org.uk/ncvo-volunteering/find-a-volunteer-centre

You will be able to redo your maths and English for free. Either a gcse or functional skills (which is quicker and easier). You can do it from home - try your local council adult education department but there are lots of other providers. If I were you I’d pick one with plenty of tutor support.

If you struggle with organisation there are some great apps to help with that which can help you to learn to manage your time more effectively.

Rather than going for jobs for which you are unsuitable, how about thinking about what you are good at. Do you have any hobbies? Are you good with people? Do you like being outdoors? What work could you do where you would feel happy and confident?

I would also say that you need to be a bit kinder to yourself.

I have no organisation skills, time awareness, no ability to focus or complete tasks or attention to detail or in fact attention for anything

You've brought up children and been a SAHM. How many times have you written a shopping list (organisation skills), collected your children at the end of the school day (time awareness), followed a recipe (focus to complete a task) and ironed a school uniform (attention to detail)?

You do have the skills. You're just out of the habit of applying them in the workplace.

do some evening classes if they are still available and get some qualifications. look at your local college for information and don't lie

You need two things:

1. A system
2. A job where systems can be used.

DH has no diagnosed SN, but he is forgetful, inattentive, easily side-tracked, etc. He is a site manager for several schools and he has created systems to make it work. His schools each have a book to write jobs in, so that he can see them when he arrives. He has calendar app on his phone, which sends him alarms for every regular task he does. From putting bins out, when he should arrive at each school, when he has to do water checks, safety checks, fire checks, etc. His calendar is completely full.

You can overcome your difficulties, but I think you'll need a job with a high level of routine, so that you can plan in the activities reliably.

Errrr no this isn't a little lie this is a pretty significant one - you haven't been able to hold down a job in over 10 years and by your own admission have been sacked for being unable to do the jobs to you were hired to do.....

There is making reasonable adjustments for a disability but I think it's a bit of cheeky fuckery to lie to get your foot in the door and then to expect an employer to make reasonable adjustments for someone who just isn't capable of doing the job and lied and pretended they were?? Pretty sure an employer would be able to argue that there are no possible "reasonable" adjustments they could possibly make to help someone who "doesn't have attention for anything"

Like others have said you need to focus on what you might be good at - try volunteering to get your confidence up etc - discuss with the job centre - don't they have case workers that can assist with identifying roles which might be suitable?

You can’t lie, you will be fond out

As others have said do some volunteer work, that can go on your cv and you may find it helps you boost your confidence in doing tasks

I would also be kinder to yourself - some harsh comments on here.
I would think about looking to see what your local college has to offer - functional maths and english courses are free. Colleges also offer guidance and support and could sign-post you to job advice. Work hard at the college (would only be a few hours a week) you have somewhere to ask for a reference - from your previous job record that might be useful. Don't give up you can do this.

List your positives too. Don't knock yourself I know it feels awful when your trying to learn but the panicking block's your mind.
I'd look at trying home help to get you on the ladder, listen to some focusing meditation video's on YouTube.
You can do it.

Office work isn't for everyone.

If you lie on CB or interview especially about qualifications you can get sacked for gross misconduct. Best to be honest. Say I did not do well at school but I more than capable of doing job. I second do some volunteering and they will give you reference. This proves you can work now.