Ex taking kids to Spain

[WhatwouldJudydo]

Ex due to fly to canaries in a couple of weeks time. Following government guidance assumed it would be cancelled however ex has said its going ahead and he wants me to quarantine with the kids after due to working from home and is saying he can't keep them. AIBU not dropping all my plans so the kids can go away?

Oh and if he does use the 'mum says you can't go' card

Tell them the truth,

They can't go because dad won't quarantine them.

@MzHz

These are your kids, this is your livlihood, you can and need to say no, they’re not going and fuck the fucking lot of them

Why aren’t you standing up for what’s best for your kids and what will help you keep a roof over your head? Why does your ex feelings come before your welfare? Your kids welfare or your career?

Really, why?

You need to reflect on why you are continuing to let him control you. In this case at risk of your job if you don't say no.

I don't want them to go really no, but he has told the kids they can and if I don't let them all hell will break loose.

This isn't about the holiday at all. This is about how he is dictating your life. This isnt going to stop until you confront it and deal with it.

This time its the holiday. Next time it will be something else. And there will be a next time.

And this is putting your children potentially at risk and certainly isn't in their best interests. Not if you might be risking your job.

Its time to stand up for yourself instead of being shat all over. If you don't it will continue and come at an even bigger price.

And yes this is all about framing you as the bad guy whilst he gets to be fun dad who gives them all the stuff.

Thats what children might want but its not what they need.

I think if you let them go you're being selfish. In the kindest way possible, please assess this.

1 child is being left out. The children that are going could end up with costly medical bills. Your job is on the line, because as a teacher and key worker you WILL be expected back at work. If you do quarantine with the kids, and still go into work you're risking the lives of the teaching faculty, as well as the lives of those vulnerable at home of children and staff.

This is bigger than being too tired to fight it. It isn't just you that could be impacted.

And tell XH if his new gf didn't want loads of kids in her house she shouldn't have gotten with a man with kids.

@Couchbettato

I think if you let them go you're being selfish. In the kindest way possible, please assess this.

1 child is being left out. The children that are going could end up with costly medical bills. Your job is on the line, because as a teacher and key worker you WILL be expected back at work. If you do quarantine with the kids, and still go into work you're risking the lives of the teaching faculty, as well as the lives of those vulnerable at home of children and staff.

This is bigger than being too tired to fight it. It isn't just you that could be impacted.

And tell XH if his new gf didn't want loads of kids in her house she shouldn't have gotten with a man with kids.

Totally agree.