To think I'm not the keeper of milk

[TellingTelephone]

There is a story behind this but it is dull and so I'll keep it to the bare minimum.

DP has essentially told me it is my fault he didn't get any milk when he popped into the local one stop for "supplies". He claims he didn't know we needed milk even though he has been making cups of tea today. "How was he suppose to know" he asks... because he has eyes and a brain too, surely?

It's not a massive deal but him telling me it's my fault due to my poor communication skills has filled me with silent rage.

What a load of crap. You do realise this is pure deflection, don’t you? He is the poor communicator, not you. He is the drinker of milk and was responsible for communicating he needed more.

I'm the Keeper of Milk, the Keeper of Underpants, the Keeper of Ketchup ( which I never use ).

Sometimes I fall down on the job.

@MsVestibule ahh that type of passive aggression speaks to me. I shall remember this and attempt to pass the responsibility of Milk Keeper on to him.

You’re doing it all wrong. You don’t attempt to pass the responsibility on to him; you just do it:
You: DH, from now on, you’re responsible for making sure we don’t run out of milk. I’m abdicating all responsibility for it.
Him: I refuse to take on that responsibility.
You: Tough, it’s yours.

Three days later:

Him: Why don’t we have any milk?
You: Dunno, it’s your responsibility, nothing to do with me 🤷‍♀️.

I swear it works. It works especially well when you don’t care whether you have milk or not.

For a laugh write an in/out chart on the fridge and make everyone use it..

Amount of milk our house goes through per day? = 5 to 6 pints
Amount of milk I drink? = 0 pints
Amount of milk anyone else buys? = 0 pints

I think someone else needs to be keeper of the milk (and bread).

Oh and DS2 at home from Uni thinks that nothing is his fault and he is definitely not lazy, don't i know he's been looking after himself for about 5 months. I saw what he was doing, it definitely wasn't looking after himself.

Aah the poor thing . Blind and not too bright, buy him a cow.

(if I send dh to the shops (rarely) he gets a note saying what we need, he returns with some of those things, a lot of miscellaneous, but if something is missing his Pronto-response is 'it didn't say on the list'). Considering the many, many times he opens the fridge, he is not that bright either. Sympathy .

@MsVestibule thank you. I'm going to pass the Torch of Milk Keeping over tomorrow and sit back and watch the nuclear fall out Monday morning when there is no milk for his crunchy nut cornflakes.

[quote TellingTelephone]@MsVestibule thank you. I'm going to pass the Torch of Milk Keeping over tomorrow and sit back and watch the nuclear fall out Monday morning when there is no milk for his crunchy nut cornflakes.[/quote]
Please let there be an actual torch - you could make one from a crunchy nut cornflake box for added point.

I'm going to make DS the Keeper of the milk !! He's home from uni and drinks 3 pints a day .. puts the empty cartons back in the fridge ..

We had exactly this situation today only with DD not DH.

My husband says the same and I turned round and said I ain't a cow and just fill up the milk..

DS said that his uni flat mates made fun of him for drinking milk :(

Keeper of the bread here. Haven’t eaten bread for years!

@WaxOnFeckOff I shall make a crunchy nut cornflake Torch on Monday when I have my nephew. He loves an arts and crafts project.

@TellingTelephone

I don't want a milk delivery. It shouldn't be that hard for him to clock we need milk. It's funny how he knows if we he has run out of beer and is down the shop pronto to correct this crime against humanity.

DH helpfully suggested putting the empty cartons on his pillow

I think you should hide drink his beer instead. You're saving him from himself.

MsVestibule

It's not the same thing, OP, but I;'d be tempted to suggest he needs to go to the loo. and breathe. and blink. and other mundane things. If you're the oracle of life, presumably he'd struggle without the reminder.

I'd also be tempted to drink or hide the beer. Frequently.

If he carries on, I'd look significantly at the patio when he starts. Or leave a sketched note with a drawing of a patio, 6ft hole and pot plant with some cryptic words alluding to a milk-based insanity plea.

Good luck.

We buy milk weekly, the amount we usually drink. When it's gone it's gone, same as any other food. I only make sure I have enough if I'm expecting guests as I know some see it as essential.

Put a picture of Maggie Thatcher, the milk snatcher, on his pillow and blame her.

If he carries on, I'd look significantly at the patio when he starts. Or leave a sketched note with a drawing of a patio, 6ft hole and pot plant with some cryptic words alluding to a milk-based insanity plea.

You might need a tape measure - you want to make sure the hole is just the right size for the body and a few cartons of milk

Do you have a cellar? Lock him in there and drown him in milk.

Maybe you want to ask him what he would do if you weren’t there - eg if you died. Would his brain engage then or would he starve/live in a pigsty/fail to pay the bills or anything else he seems to have deemed wifework?

@whirlwindwallaby

We buy milk weekly, the amount we usually drink. When it's gone it's gone, same as any other food. I only make sure I have enough if I'm expecting guests as I know some see it as essential.

I don't have room in my fridge to get enough for a week I get 5 x 4 pints twice a week.

It was terrible when the limits were on. The co-op only allowed 1 milk which is fine, it needs to be rationed out, however they only had 1 pint cartons - it didn't go very far.

[quote TellingTelephone]@WaxOnFeckOff I shall make a crunchy nut cornflake Torch on Monday when I have my nephew. He loves an arts and crafts project.[/quote]
Looking forward to a photo of that!