About a baby being at the pub?

[Hcisab]

Its friday night, baby was maybe 1year old, seemed very happy and energetic, mum and dad both drinking but neither seemed drunk, both giving lots of attention to the baby and they left at 9 when all minors had to leave.

Would you judge them?

I'd be super impressed by a 1 year old with the co-ordination to dance.

No, but seriously - I wouldn't judge, and I think people saying 'pubs used to be for grown ups' have forgotten that this was before the smoking ban, when there were genuine good reasons to keep children out.

I had a non-sleeping baby and toddler, and it was murder. It was lovely being that bit older, because you're right, people judge based on age. But even so, people still judged on occasion, and you have to learn to smile and nod and ignore. Yes, maybe their babies slept really well and you're just not doing the right thing. Or maybe, your baby just doesn't want to sleep.

IMO at this age, the most important thing is that the baby is happy and you are happy. If that means the baby is awake and watching mum and dad finish off a nice pub meal at 9pm, go with it.

Not something I would personally do, but then I'm not really one to frequent a pub.

When my eldest was young she would come to restaurants with us. Under the age of 1 I never felt comfortable leaving her with anyone, so we would only go for meals with friends and family that invited her along. Luckily she was always a very cheerful baby so never much bother, so she would be invited most of the time we was. She would generally have her dinner then cuddle up to me in her sling and fall asleep. I'm sure people probably raised their eyebrows at us too, but quite frankly I don't give a fuck. As long as your child is happy and healthy, and isn't impeding on anyone elses evening, what does it matter what other people think?

Be back tomorrow with my thoughts. Bedtimes calling

Nope, not unreasonable at all

Nope..
I grew up being taken to our local social club every Fri night. And occasionally sat nights. From 6m, at 16 I went alone and met family there. It closed when I was 24. :(
I also took my ds regularly for the 1st 2 yrs of his life.
Never got drunk.. Not did my parents as dad drove, mum was a non driver.

My dd often goes with grandparents to a pub for a meal. Doesn't run around or anything ( if I took her she prob would)

No I wouldn't judge but then I'm "foreign" and from a country where it's normal for children to be out late. I find the British tradition with rigid routines and children being in bed by 7pm a bit baffling. I probably get judged loads over here for my habits but I don't care, as long as you're not hurting anyone just do what works for you.

A year ago, it would have not even caught my attention. Today, I would judge their parenting harshly. It has nothing to do with it being a pub and everything to do with being an absolutely unnecessary risk.

I don’t like being places with other people’s children, if they are typically adult places like pubs. But it depends on the type of pub really. I love sitting in beer gardens late in the evening and kids are fine there. But everyone needs a break from kids.

No!

As long as your child is happy and healthy
What's that got to do with whether to take them for a evening down the pub or not?!

Going off the subject slightly, but I am interested to know if everyone was wearing masks in the pub or is that just shops and supermarkets.

I work in a pub and I would have judged you for letting him dance on the table. Even if you got him straight off how did he even have the chance to climb right on to the table, stand up and start dancing if you were watching him properly?
We are a kid friendly pub with kids menus etc but it's a total pain in the arse the way parents let their kids climb about and run/crawl all over the place. It's so dangerous when people are walking around with hot drinks and trying to serve food.
We usually end up getting a mouthful if we politely ask the parents to control their little darlings though.

Having worked in hospitality, would have cringed to see a child scramble up onto a table to “dance”. The overexcited shrieking would be annoying, so would be grateful they were taken out. I wonder how long the overexcited was before they were removed so they could cool off outside.

From an occupational health & safety perspective, a child being able to get up onto a table is a hazard. We are in an environment with glass/hot food + drinks and the table may be unsecured to the floor - people walking past, it’s all very dangerous. Not to mention if at any point shoes touched the table, it’s such a bad look.

If you were sitting in a pub & someone got up on the table, you would look. Having parents dotingly smile at their child dancing on a table in a pub would be annoying personally - I would judge you for it.

As long as you take them out if they start crying. Trying to have a quiet drink and a kid wailing is awful as the pub should be a pace to get away from crying kids.

I wouldn’t judge under the details given but I did judge at 11pm in a loud nightclub in Benidorm When two girls about 18/19?walked in with a buggy each with a sleeping toddler (how they slept in that noise is anyone’s guess). The girls parked the buggies in a corner and went off to dance 😮

For those with small ‘night owls’ up til 10/11 and later, how does that work with school when they can’t sleep in late? Lost sleep means tired minds which don’t achieve their potential.

Fine for now OP but a decent routine and proper bedtime is pretty important when they start nursery/school - and have to be up and out - so they can get enough sleep to function healthily.

Some posters here are so British with their attitude of it being late at 9pm. Perhaps it is late if it’s a school night and they have to get up early, but this doesn’t seem to be the case. It’s the summer, it’s not even dark until 10pm. Enjoy your baby op & do not be anxious of what other people think.

Nope. I’m too busy enjoying my own life without judging others’ living theirs. Now, if said baby was screaming the place down and the parents were not attending to it, I might be a bit annoyed. But this doesn’t sound like the case.

I take my 1yo to the pub, even past his bedtime. DH and I never get absolutely blathered but we may be there for a few hours.
I never let me 1yo get on the tables. Even if it were a one off. That to me says you're not watching your child as well as you could and could befall grievous bodily harm to them. I would feel that the lack of attention was maybe down to reduced cognitive ability due to alcohol.
If we go out to the pub, DS is in the baby carrier on my back at all times, and usually goes to sleep in there too.

Nope. Pubs ain't what they used to be be. 40 years ago maybe.

I would judge you for letting your child on the tables but not for having them out late, I would assume it was a once off.

A baby is fine, a older child, old enough to know what's going on - not so much. I wouldn't want children to witness adults getting drunk, or hearing the swearing and seeing other behaviours that (sometimes/often) go with excessive drinking.

I wouldn't judge, unless the parent was clearly drunk and unable to care for their child. I also think it's wrong to have children in a pub too late. Lastly, I personally wouldn't choose to take a child to a pub during the pandemic.

It would have been me 12 years ago, my oldest made his own hours and never wanted to go to bed early. He is pretty similar now but he needs to go to bed for school. So I would not judge and would not have expected to be judged either.

If the child was sitting and doing some sort of quiet activity, I wouldn't judge. If it was crying, squealing, endlessly prattling on or toddling about I would be pissed off. Getting on the table would have had me at least swearing under my breath and wondering wtf the parents were thinking.

And if it was with the parents I once saw changing a nappy on the neighbouring table, and leaving the wet nappy just sitting on the next table, I would certainly judge.

I'm the same about dogs in pubs, really. If they're sitting quietly with their owners, fine, if they're allowed to roam about bothering other people, or barking/whining, the owners need a stern word from the landlord. And I say that as someone who prefers dogs to people!

I wouldn't judge this. We were in the pub thursday afternoon though and a couple had a 2/3 yr old in a pram and I judged them. They were there for 3 hours and the child didn't get out the pram. He just screamed every 20 minutes to draw attention to himself so they got him some food and then carried on. It was very sad.