To think putting baby down awake is an unrealistic goal

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My baby is 4 months old and has never been one to fall asleep on her own; she needs to be fed to sleep.
She was sleeping through but the last few weeks she's been waking multiple times and won't settle unless she's breastfed back to sleep. The only consistent advice I seem to see is that I should be putting her down still ever so slightly awake. But if she is not in a deep sleep, she will not stay asleep for any period of time at all. As soon as I put her down, she cries and she doesn't stop until I pick her back up again. I posted on here a few weeks ago that we managed to get her to sleep holding her hands and stroking her cheek but she was crying and I was crucified for sleep training too young... Fine, but what do I actually do? People still just keep saying put her down when she's still awake! But she cries! So how do I do that and not leave her to cry for any period of time?! I'm genuinely asking! How can I get her to accept being put down?

It really doesn't matter what you do OP, practice changes all the time.
When mine were little you were spoiling them if they weren't sleeping through the night at x time, if you were feeding them to sleep past age z.
Do it your own way because I can guarantee if you have more dc the advice will be different again.

Also I would have to agree with the people saying 4 months is too young to expect them to sleep independently or settle themselves. For many babies this is true. I know for you it must feel like forever though and you have my sympathy there totally. I drove myself mad wondering why my DD wouldn’t settle herself then after some research realised it was just too much to expect from her at that age. I think it’s hard when your friends or other mums at baby groups talk about their great sleepers doing 12 hours from 4 months old but honestly I don’t think it’s down to what you do it’s just luck of the draw and the personality of your baby that affects these things.