Non-binary

[UnaCorda]

As an intersex person, AIBU to feel slightly put out that "non-binary" has been comandeered/appropriated (if it's fair to use those terms) by people who just want to be a bit different/special?

(Sorry, that sounds a bit snarky. I would like to understand why people feel this term is important.)

Imo, if you have XX chromosomes, a womb, ovaries, breasts, a vagina, etc., you're a woman. You may not be girly, you may not be straight, you may be unconventional in myriad ways, but do those personality traits really need a label? Or, if they do, is it necessary for that label to suggest that we aren't, essentially, a binary species?

I also don't like being tagged on to the whole LGBTQ... alphabet spaghetti, but not sure whether that is a related issue. (NB I think being transgender is a different case and I'm not referring to those who genuinely feel they're in the wrong body.)

I am willing to be persuaded that IABU, but would like to hear people's opinions.

Good luck with this on here lol

@DrManhattan

Good luck with this on here lol

Hah!

YANBU OP.

YANBU.

Non-binary implies that everyone else is fine with the gender stereotypes that are imposed on them due to their sex. I certainly ain't. But I fight against it instead of opting out. Non-binary is basically cowardice.

I can hardly understand what your post means 🙄

Absolutely.
People with DSDs are as male or female as anybody else, as I'm sure you know. Non binary is a personality type and a very boring one.

YANBU OP. if I were you and was dragged into the LBTQ+ etc collection of letters I’d be pissed off too.

I'm interested to hear what intersex people think of this. Thank you.

My take on it is that as long as society still persists with the insistence that there are only two sexes/genders, then anyone who doesn't identify with those should be at liberty to describe themselves as 'non-binary'.

I don't see it as a term that should be exclusive to intersex people, trans people, or any specific group, more that it's a term for anyone who doesn't identify with the typical biological female and female gender, or biological male and male gendered identities that society tries to impose on absolutely everyone.

@Delbelleber

I can hardly understand what your post means 🙄

Er, really? Which bit of it do you not understand?

I completely agree op. Intersex people have been completely taken advantage of by several companies. Even worse, some of these companies are pushing dangerous narratives onto children and vulnerable people behind the intersex label.

Non-binary implies that everyone else is fine with the gender stereotypes that are imposed on them due to their sex.

I'm not happy with a lot of stereotypes and attitudes either, but I don't think that stops me being a woman. It makes me a woman who wants to have equal rights, who doesn't want to be treated as a sex object, who wants to be respected, etc.

I guess I am out of touch with these modern terms.

Non-binary implies that everyone else is fine with the gender stereotypes that are imposed on them due to their sex. I certainly ain't. But I fight against it instead of opting out. Non-binary is basically cowardice.

THIS.

Gender, as a concept, is basically a load of sexist bollocks, and non-binary is part of that because it depends on the idea that the other genders exist.

I’m a woman, because my sex is female, but I refuse to identify as a gender.

@GoshHashana

YANBU.

Non-binary implies that everyone else is fine with the gender stereotypes that are imposed on them due to their sex. I certainly ain't. But I fight against it instead of opting out. Non-binary is basically cowardice.

Really positive way of looking at it, I think.

Totally agree with you.

@Delbelleber

I guess I am out of touch with these modern terms.

Like vagina?

Yip.

YABU. Do whatever you like but don’t try to enforce your views onto me. I refuse to listen to Sam Smith’s music because of his whole issue around being non-binary. Whatever you may think @UnaCorda I personally do think that people in this category are themselves as special and are also indecisive.

Man, woman, straight, gay, bi, trans.... Got ya...... All the other stuff nope

Totally agree OP. Can I ask just to understand more what is the nature of your intersex condition?

Gender, as a concept, is basically a load of sexist bollocks, and non-binary is part of that because it depends on the idea that the other genders exist

I can both agree with this and partly disagree at the same time

I think if you believe that gender concepts are basically nonsense, but accept that notions of gender due to societal constructs are a very real thing, you can describe as 'non-binary' to emphasise that you don't identify with the two prominent societal notions of gender, whilst still believing the entire thing is needless.

I see it as being possible to believe that ultimately there should be no such thing as a concept of gender ideally, but people being pragmatic enough to recognise that as of right now it exists, and therefore non-binary is still a necessary label. I don't think that's contradictory, just pragmatism and operating within an imperfect framework.

There are 10 types of people in this world who understand binary.

Those who do and those who don't.

@TrickorTreacle

There are 10 types of people in this world who understand binary.

Those who do and those who don't.

Boom boom!

Yanbu OP

What does “inter sex” mean?