To be utterly exasperated with the ‘but she’s really friendly’ dog owners out there

[Flamingolingo]

You know the kind - the ones who holler after their bounding dog who barks and bows and jumps at you about how friendly they are.

I feel like since lockdown I’ve had multiple altercations with people and their marauding dogs. Especially either while out running or out with my small children who are terrified.

That’s not to say there aren’t loads of really responsible dog owners out there who do try and call their dog back/put it on the lead, but the few who make no attempt other than shout about their friendliness really get my goat. For clarity: we are mostly using city centre green space, that is quite busy, I think in a rural location it’s a little different.

So I guess my Aibu is about my being annoyed at people who assume everyone wants their ‘friendly’ dog to bound into their social space, and who make no attempt to call their dog back unless specifically asked to.

My knee jerk reaction is to respond ‘Well I’m not!’

Mine too! I’m not scared of dogs (in the sense that I think they will bite), I just find them really, really unpleasant and I don’t want them to come up to me and lick me. Dog owners seem unable to comprehend this. I don’t care if your dog is friendly. My husband is friendly, but that doesn’t mean you want his nose shoved in your crotch.....

I have never agreed with anyone more OP. we can't take the DDs to the local park as it happens every single time. And the fee times I've complained, I've been called a cow, or told 'this is a dog park' -it bloody isn't. But the entitlement of dog walkers who don't have control of their dogs ruins it for anyone else.

It's really irresponsible. Also children shouldnt be encouraged to go near strange dogs and shouting "she's friendly" just encourages them to think that strange dogs are friendly.

We had the opposite problem recently. A little old dog walking along without a lead, near her owner but not in grabbing distance. My friends child (aged 3) walked near and the owner shouted "No dont go near her! She will bite you!"
Well why isnt she wearing a bloody lead and/or muzzle then?

The people who voted you are being unreasonable must be irresponsible dog owners. You are definitely not being unreasonable.

My husband is friendly, but that doesn’t mean you want his nose shoved in your crotch..

I used to say that about my 6’ son. Do you want him to rush up to your child, pick them up, throw them in the air and have a romp? Or to you?
He’s strong enough, and very friendly, and if you scream or run...it’s your fault for joining in the game.

@Mammamia2020 when I was a child we had a border collie who would seek out picnic eaters and very quietly lie down in front of them, just in case

I well remember a dog owner saying this to DH as the small, yappy dog was swinging by its lockjaw from DH's groin and the blood was showing through on his trousers.

Followed by, "He doesn't really bite" as the blood continued to bloom on his trousers.

@Obbydoo but I was controlling my children. I had one in each hand and was talking calmly to them. I normally voice whatever the dog is doing, and if it looks disinterested I will tell them that the dog isn’t interested in them. I always do my part with the children, pick them up if needed, keep them as quiet as can be. But the times I get annoyed are when people make absolutely no effort to do anything about their dog. It’s just bad mannered

@EmbarrassingAdmissions 😱😱😱

Op this absolutely winds me up when my youngest was little we went walking in a local park and a huge dog bound up to her and knocked her down the owner said oh its OK she friendly and loves children my dd has been terrified since, the other week out for our walk a dog comes running past barking chasing a squirrel and my daughter nearly flips out climbs up my leg the owner of dog walk past and say you shouldn't bring her out if she is that scared of dogs she will just aggregate them honestly could of slapped her so I do think dogs should be on leads unless in rural area where not many ppl will be

Where are all these marauding dogs?! I don't see them. Is it perhaps that you are hypersensitive due to you and your children's phobia? It's worth working on that, as dogs are everywhere.

Or investing in a nasty spray.

@hibbledobble in fairness, it’s probably

I hate that dog owners think it's their choice whether their dog can approach me/my children and not mine. Honestly. I don't care if it's big/small/harmless/super friendly just keep it the fuck away. It's up to me.

We have a puppy and this is an issue for us- yanbu! There is a lady who can't control a French mastiff and a man with a bouncy akita- we change the time we go to our massive park because of them. We are paying for puppy training classes - they need to go to training classes too!

@cuntryclub - I hate that dog owners think it's their choice whether their dog can approach me/my children and not mine.

And I hate that parents think it's their choice where their child can approach my dog and not mine.

I am a dog owner and could not agree with you more. My dog is put on a lead as soon as we encounter other people and doesn't have any interaction unless asked for by the people - e.g., asking to meet him.

Unwanted interaction either way is annoying; space belongs to all, and all should be free to enjoy it without others negatively impacting upon them.

I am pretty fortunate in that I live rurally and very rarely encounter anyone anyway.

YANBU

I snap back that mine isn't as he's snarling at the one who has just invaded his personal space. ( Mine is always on a lead in public)

For a small dog mine actually sounds a lot more ferocious than he actually is and they generally rush to retrieve their errant animal

Well, maybe things in urban areas will calm down when more people go back to work...and dump their Corona dogs in shelters. I hear that the rescues up and down the country are bracing themselves for dog-lovers to fill them beyond capacity by Christmas.

My 7 yr old DD is afraid of dogs. We were on a walk last weekend & there were lots of dogs. She’s fine with them on a lead, but when they’re off of one she’s very nervous.
She started running to me crying because a medium sized dog was running behind her, barking. I picked her up & told her not to worry & then the owner jogged past & said to her ‘it’s your fault for running & crying, you’ve made him excited, he won’t hurt you if you’re calm’.
I was so bloody angry!
We also had a picnic the previous weekend with friends & their children & we had 6 dogs crash it. The first one ran over all of the food & actually ate the very nice expensive prawn noodle salad my friend had made for everyone. The owner was 5 minutes behind the dog & apologetic & there was nothing we could do apart from accept the apology. Then, to add insult to injury, 5, yes 5 more ownerless dogs came over 15 minutes later & ate the rest of the food. When their owner finally turned up we said that they had eaten the food including chocolate & grapes, she offered no apology & just said that her dogs eat everything & are never ill! Next picnic I’m taking tables & chairs.

Add a bottle of chilli oil spray as salad dressing to your next picnic. It’s a good deterrent.

The thing dog owners need to think about is that it is an offence for any dog to be out of control in a public place. If a dog 'bounds up' and makes contact with an adult or child it is by definition 'out of control'. There was a case local to me where many dog owners were most upset that a dog was put to sleep after bounding up and licking a teenager (other observers say the teenager was shouting to the owner to call the dog away and the owner failed to do anything, with the owner later giving a tearful interview saying the dog was 'loyal, harmless, and friendly). Sadly the teenager concerned had an anaphylaxis to the contact with dog and died. It seemed unfair that the dog suffered for its owners incompetence, but I think it should be publicised that it doesn't matter how 'friendly' a dog is if it causes harm.

Parents should most certainly keep their children under effective control, and restrain them from approaching and molesting strange dogs.

However, between the two - I've heard of dogs killing toddlers, but not so much about toddlers killing dogs. I've seen a girl left with two holes where her nose was, after a dog bit it off, but I've not seen a dog sans nose because a kid bit it off.

My dog detests children and people and wont approach any of them.
Funnily enough this offends people too.

Its been particularly difficult during lockdown as everyone is using the same public spaces - in volumes!
I look after my son and dil's dog frequently and I haven't felt able to let her off her lead (other than very early in the morning) when walking her, as there are so many people and other dogs off lead bounding around.
I think that there are many dog owners who just don't think that just because they love their dog not everyone does.
Small children running about and shrieking are not a good mix with many dogs.