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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

"I don't know why i never put weight on because i eat alot" comment is just being smug?

123 replies

SummerPeonies · 16/07/2020 21:31

lighthearted

Or am i being unfair?

OP posts:
Coffeecak3 · 17/07/2020 09:46

I'm in my 60's. Flabbier now but still slim.

In my 30's my large ex sil told everyone I was anorexic, I'm not. At work a large colleague commented on everything I ate at break until I stopped sitting with her.

Coffeecak3 · 17/07/2020 09:48

Pressed send to early.
It gets tedious. I don't comment on other people regardless of their weight.

LabradorGalore · 17/07/2020 09:52

I used to say this Blush I eat three meals a day plus snacks, so thought that was a good amount.

Then I had a Chinese take away at my friends house- there were a large group of friends there at the time. I was shocked at some of the portion sizes. Some people there ate double what I did. That’s when I realised that it’s not only what you’re eating but portion size is just as important.

I’ve never said it again. I’m a healthy bmi so it’s not like my portion sizes are ridiculously small before anyone assumes.

MushyPeasAreTheDevilsFood · 17/07/2020 10:17

Also the ones who eat loads of chocolate and crisps seemed to eat them in lieu of a meal.

This is me. Im not arsed about ‘nice food.’ Im vegetarian and lazy in the kitchen and describe Most of the hot food i eat as gruel 😂 (Lots of stews). However, like most vegans / vegetarians i make the most awesome salads.

Another habit ive noticed when eating with others is sauces. Some cover their meals with sauces of some kind. I only ever, apart from pepper sauce on a portobello mushroom, use vinaigrette or Vinegar.

I think a lot of people add calories to otherwise healthy food, like people who add butter to their veg, or cream to a slice of cake, or full fat milk in their coffee. Or have huge portion of the main food of the meal and small portion of veg. They might look at their ‘naturally slim’ friend eating with them and see the same amount of food on their plate, not noticing that their friend’s plate has an appropriate size portion of the main food And a huge amount of veg. They might not notice their friend didnt use mayo etc. They might not have seen their friend order coke zero instead of original Or a milkshake Or wine. Or their friends lunch That day might have been a ham sandwich or a salad, compared to their own full plate meal lunch.

There are many ways to turn the same meal into plates of vastly different calories.

A friend makes all her meals from scratch as she enjoys cooking, and would seem to be good healthy food, but her portion size is about half a plate more than id consider a normal amount, and she will also often eat it with a bottle of wine. And she doesnt understand why she has put on weight.

A more appropriate amount of food (not fish. Fish is larger) would fit happily on a Side plate. Today’s dinner plate sizes are much larger than they used to be, and people fill their plates with food. If you want to maintain a healthier weight, change to large side plates.

Pinkyandthebrainz · 17/07/2020 10:25

Jealous Grin

Flopjustwantscoffee · 17/07/2020 10:26

Its also possible to be a fat thin person. In other words - reasonably slim but high colesterol etc due to crap diet (this used to be me so Im not getting at other people here). The point is that often diet is only seen as important to how someone looks - often the reson for diets etc is to achieve a "bikini body etc". Actual fitness/health is much more important and sometimes more directly linked to nutrition and exercise...

bfordmama · 17/07/2020 10:37

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ for privacy reasons.

excuseforfights · 17/07/2020 11:12

Yes it’s smug. I remember in my 20s people would ask me how I would stay so slim while scarfing a packet of Marylands every day and I’d just say ‘I have a fast metabolism’.

Those days are long gone as I’m 3 stone overweight! I truly did have a fast metabolism then I guess but I didn’t know it wouldn’t last forever!

Stay123 · 17/07/2020 11:32

I was always slim but ate lots now I am middle aged I am chubbier but am not bothered. Got a lot of you must just eat lots of lettuce comments off women. Don’t get them now so am just left alone which is much better.

TheNewLook · 17/07/2020 11:41

I think if you were to closely monitor the diet of a “naturally skinny” person, you’d see that they don’t in fact eat everything. They may well eat junk food and takeaways etc but they likely correct at other meals, skip breakfast, walk everywhere.

SerenDippitty · 17/07/2020 11:43

I’m another one who was very slim in my 20s despite eating processed crap and not exercising. My lunch most days was a cheese sandwich, a packet of crisps and a Twix. Then again I drank very little alcohol and didn’t drive.

doskant · 17/07/2020 11:43

I think I’d feel smug if I managed to eat Alot too. He’s enormous! Poor tasty, misunderstood Alot...

Notredamn · 17/07/2020 11:49
Grin
flooredbored · 17/07/2020 11:50

Some people really do eat what they want and not put on weight. In the same way others put on weigh easily.

zingally · 17/07/2020 12:00

I have a family friend (22, so still young), who eats loads, but doesn't put on weight. She's about 5"8 and model-slim. Legs for days.

It'll catch up with her one day.

Notredamn · 17/07/2020 12:01

How do you know that, @zingally? Or does it just make you feel better to say it?

excuseforfights · 17/07/2020 12:03

It'll catch up with her one day.

Ouch! 🐱 miaow!

Alfiemoon1 · 17/07/2020 12:05

I am like this still after 2 kids and being 43 people at work have said they thought I was anorexic until they saw how much I could eat think I have hollow legs
Definitely not boasting i would love to put on a bit of weight

Raimona · 17/07/2020 12:18

A couple of years ago there was a C4 documentary called The Truth About Slim People. You can still watch it on catch up. They concluded that while slim people think they’re eating whatever they want, in reality they’re consuming a low number of calories. They don’t drink much alcohol. They unconsciously compensate for a calorific meal by eating less the next day. They skip meals and don’t snack. They tend to fidget and exercise a lot - even if they don’t go to the gym, they walk and do other activities. Their metabolisms were measured as normal.

THisbackwithavengeance · 17/07/2020 12:24

I think a minority of people have very, very active metabolisms and hence I would consider them lucky.

But I know women who say they eat a lot but their idea of "a lot" is not my idea of a lot. I used to work with a very slim woman who would go on about how much she ate; she didn't. Her lunch would be a tin of soup, no bread and then perhaps an apple which is what I would if I were dieting.

Most very slim people of my acquaintance habitually skip meals or pick at them or smoke loads in lieu of meals.

MushyPeasAreTheDevilsFood · 17/07/2020 12:37

Most very slim people of my acquaintance habitually skip meals

I agree, but think that is only half of the story. For the past five weeks of work ive been working In ‘the office’ shorter days. So we didnt have allocated lunchtime. I had half a bagel before i left for work, didnt eat lunch but had an apple instead. And sometimes biscuits Purely because they were on the desk. And had evening mealS as normal when i got home. So yes youd say i skipped a meal. However, i wasnt hungry. So id say i ate when hungry. I think having set meal times Means people eat because it is time to eat, not because they need to eat.

People have often said they envy my figure and i must have a fast metabolism. But do you know what? When i eat more cheese at christmas i put weight on. When im moving around less as not at work, i put weight on. If i had a ‘fast metabolism’ i wouldnt go up dress size in two weeks of christmas just by adding cheese and crackers and baileys to my normal diet. I put weight on at christmas BecUse I’m consuming more calories.

I dont stay a size 8/10 through magic, good genes or metabolism. It is though appropriate portion sizes, good habits, and moving a lot.

Parents really beed to admit to themselves that if they're overweight and their children are overweight it isnt their genes, it is bad habits that theyve learnt and are now teaching their children. Until society Gets rid of this nonsense that weight is completely out of a person’s control, then it wont get better.

Bbang · 17/07/2020 12:43

Lol this was me until I hit my late 20’s now I’m fat, I used to eat disgusting amounts of crap and drink like a fish and stay a size 8 with natural tone.

Then I had two babies in two years hit my late 20’s and it all went to shit 😂 oh well . .

CharityRoyall · 17/07/2020 12:53

Like other posters have said I think people have varying ideas of what ‘a lot’ constitutes. As someone who’s recovered from BED, I can tell you most people’s version of a lot does not sound like anything much against my version 😂

CharityRoyall · 17/07/2020 12:56

Also I’ll never stop being shocked by how many people comment on what other people eat. I don’t want people commenting on my eating habits, so I don’t comment on theirs! Simple.

FancyPants20 · 17/07/2020 13:00

Dp eats enormous amounts of food and can't put weight on. He'll have a massive pile of pasta in a creamy sauce for dinner, for example, followed by slabs of chocolate and full-fat yoghurts for dessert. He even used to drink the protein drinks for muscle men at one stage in a bid to gain weight but it didn't work.
He just has a really, really fast metabolism that isn't showing any signs of slowing with age even now he's 54, despite others' gleeful predictions. Hmm
I am not like that, however, and regularly call him a jammy git.

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