"I don't know why i never put weight on because i eat alot" comment is just being smug?

[SummerPeonies]

lighthearted

Or am i being unfair?

It's not bullshitting to say this for some reason but it depends on the context as to whether they ABU. DH eats huge amounts of food including a reasonable amount of unhealthy stuff he is 6" 4 and a 30 waist is a little loose. People often imply he must be a fussy eater or not eat well etc so if that implication is made he will correct them. My cousin is around 5ft and tiny she eats huge meals every day, mostly home cooked food but not salads etc, snacks and has never counted a calorie in her life or set foot in a gym, she left hospital after both babies in size 6 jeans, she is often accused of dieting or you can't eat like that all the time etc, well actually she does I've known her all my life and her mum was the same, huge appetite, didn't gain an excess pound until she was in her late sixties and even then very little. I unfortunately look at a Belgian bun and gain three pounds. I think often it's an element of jealousy and then rightly she feels the need to defend herself.

I comparatively don't eat a lot in terms of high calorie food but I enjoy my food and it is enough for me. I don't really like lots of junk food, it's not green enough. I don't think being able to put away lots of junk without getting fat is something to be envious of. But then I am a healthy BMI (now but have been bigger) and slim. I eat healthily and run everyday and like it. I like to think my body is energy efficient in not requiring loads of food to function.

@LividLaughLovely what a great blog post! That made me laugh. Same for @ViciousJackdaw comment 😄

‘A lot’ or ‘what I like’ is pretty vague.
Some people think they eat a lot and actually eat very small portions or even skip meals because they are busy but feel as if they eat a lot. But yes YANBU, it’s a bit of a wind up. Why say things like that?

But yes YANBU, it’s a bit of a wind up. Why say things like that?

No it really isn't a wind up. It may just be a fact. Some people are naturally slim.

@SoftBlocks
It's not always said out of smugness. For me it's me feeling like I have to defend myself.
I've been told I look anorexic, too skinny, ill, and so on, including 'you need to eat!' I'm a size 8-10 so a bloody healthy weight but these comments are from relatives who are slightly overweight. I then feel like I have to defend myself because I do actually have 3 good meals a day, which include lasagne and macaroni cheese. I love cheese and chocolate. And yet they assume I live off half a lettuce leaf a day, so yes, it's usually in response to these comments because it makes me feel like shit.

Some people definitely do fall into this category, they just have the right metabolism.

However their definition of "a lot" may be off. My grandma is on tablets to help her gain weight and says she can't understand why because she eats (in her words) "so much".
We went round for dinner and she had less than a quarter of a ready meal shepherds pie, two small boiled potatoes, one broccoli floret and the equivalent of about half a small carrot. My toddler had a larger portion!

@HowLongCanICallitBabyWeight

It's not bullshitting to say this for some reason but it depends on the context as to whether they ABU. DH eats huge amounts of food including a reasonable amount of unhealthy stuff he is 6" 4 and a 30 waist is a little loose. People often imply he must be a fussy eater or not eat well etc so if that implication is made he will correct them. My cousin is around 5ft and tiny she eats huge meals every day, mostly home cooked food but not salads etc, snacks and has never counted a calorie in her life or set foot in a gym, she left hospital after both babies in size 6 jeans, she is often accused of dieting or you can't eat like that all the time etc, well actually she does I've known her all my life and her mum was the same, huge appetite, didn't gain an excess pound until she was in her late sixties and even then very little. I unfortunately look at a Belgian bun and gain three pounds. I think often it's an element of jealousy and then rightly she feels the need to defend herself.

It’s true I’m not sure why people can’t accept some people are naturally slim. It’s very possible and to try and patronise others and make out they must be mistaken of what they class as “a lot” quite 😁

I do eat a lot, ALOT, however I do more exercise than anyone I else I know...

@FrugiFan

Some people definitely do fall into this category, they just have the right metabolism.

However their definition of "a lot" may be off. My grandma is on tablets to help her gain weight and says she can't understand why because she eats (in her words) "so much".
We went round for dinner and she had less than a quarter of a ready meal shepherds pie, two small boiled potatoes, one broccoli floret and the equivalent of about half a small carrot. My toddler had a larger portion!

Elderly people tend to not eat big meals sometimes or compared to what they used to in their younger days... how old is your grandma.

I was like that until i had issues with my thyroid

I ate lots and I ate lots of crap even as a child it was a joke how much I ate (as an adult I was slim but not very very slim)

I had got a little rounder in my 30’s but if I ate now like I did then I would be huge

I miss those days

And I never went to the gym/did much exercise past teenage years

Just how down people are I was lucky (my luck ran out now a few stone over weight)

This is definitely a thing. I know at least two men who fall into this category. Both 40+

I meant it may be perceived as a wind up , sorry.

I know a few people like this, one is my aunt who is in her late 50s now so it hasn't 'caught up with her'. It's the way she is. None of the people exercise, either (they don't lead healthy lifestyles at all).
It's just factual. People are all different.

It’s true I’m not sure why people can’t accept some people are naturally slim. It’s very possible and to try and patronise others and make out they must be mistaken of what they class as “a lot” quite 😁

This works both ways, no one will accept you can naturally tend to overweight and make out you are mistaken or delusional about what you actually eat.

I used to eat what I wanted. But it was cereal and chocolate for breakfast, no lunch because I was too busy and a huge plate of chips for dinner, plus a takeaway on Fridays. I lost tons of weight because although I was eating whatever junk I wanted, I was still averaging about 1200 calories.

In my 20’s could eat whatever (& drink 🍷) and stayed size 6/8. I used to get a lot of comments about how thin I am.
Then I turned 30...& now I’m in my 40’s I’m fat. Wish I knew what it was that kept me thin when I was younger :(
I tried to diet end of last year having never done it before - I was constantly hungry and weight only slightly changed. I increased my gym and only lost a small amount of weight (thanks to lockdown
It found its way back to me)

I’m envious of those that are naturally thin as I once was, (I could eat cream cakes back then) then age caught up with me.

My dh is 55 this year and is very slim. He eats crap non stop. Take yesterday for example, for dinner he had a 1/4 with cheese, chips, battered sausage, 2 slices of b&b and a toffee crisp and a dairy milk after. I had a steamed salmon fillet on a bed of greens, tomato, onion, avocado and a few almonds and guess which one of is overweight. I always tell him he is fat on the inside. Makes me feel better as I get up every morning at 7 and do an hours online yoga and he does fuck all exercise.

I eat loads and I weigh 6 stone. I’m extremely poorly because of my weight and how it then effects the rest of my body as I can’t get the nutrients properly from the food. I genuinely don’t understand neither do the doctors why I can’t gain weight (I used to be 11 stone and happy and healthy.)
YABU majorly op. Stop being bitter.

[quote LividLaughLovely]Poor Alot.

hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/04/alot-is-better-than-you-at-everything.html?m=1[/quote]
That site is hilarious 🤣

I've known many slim people in my life. I've only known one who eats huge quantities of food and never goes above a size 8. I've been on holiday with her a few times and she seems to eat more than 3000 calories a day. I really believe she has a physical reason for not gaining weight. Her mum is 60 and also very thin despite eating loads. All other thin people I know either maintain it by eating sensibly or just have naturally small appetites. They don't stuff their faces.

[quote LaLaLanded]@Heyhih3 but that’s when you go out for food. Do you see how much she eats all the time?

People comment on how much I eat in relation to my BMI, including DP who actually lives with me! But they only see one meal a month, it’s not a full data set by any means!

I think what many people don’t realise is how BMR, TDEE and calories truly work, for them. They may feel they eat “a lot” or “whatever they want” or conversely that they eat “very healthily” but unless those terms are proxies for “calorie intake” then they don’t mean much at all, they’re just perception.

In summary I don’t believe there are many people who eat in calorie surplus on a regular basis and don’t gain weight. I eat “a lot” and a lot of “fattening foods” (keto) but when it’s calculated, it’s 2,000 calories per day which is my maintenance level. So it’s not actually a lot, objectively. I also run a fuckton, on my own, so unless you follow me on a running app, you don’t see that.

Some people are outliers, but not many at all. I certainly am not and none of the slim people I know are, even if they think they are - they all exercise/move, manage their diets in various ways and while their calories fluctuate they’re generally at maintenance level.[/quote]
This!!

People who are perceived by themselves or others to eat a lot and stay slim - generally don’t eat above a certain amount of calories. They may have an occasional binge but day to day they’re not over eating. Also some don’t eat carbs, or eat large portions of healthy foods. Or eat quite a bit of junk snacks but don’t eat proper meals. It’s very rare (? exists beyond tapeworms or cancer or excessive exercise) for anyone to truly eat hundreds of calories above the recommended every day and stay thin. Every person I’ve ever met (and I work in healthcare and have worked in gastro medicine) who is thin and says they eat a lot, never does, or if they do, it’s not consistently.

I remember watching a documentary on this and people who said they were eating all around them were eating less calories than those who said they ate very little.

Having lived with several different friends and also holidaying with others this is, imo, true.

One friend would have a chicken stuffing sandwich with mayo and then say she ate the same as another friend because they also had a sandwich even though theirs was no butter/mayo with ham, cucumber, tomato and onion. Literally half the calories.

Also the ones who eat loads of chocolate and crisps seemed to eat them in lieu of a meal.

There are exceptions of course but that's not my experience.

My dp eats huge portions but is 9stone fully clothed. I swear he has hollow bones.

I also work with a guy who needs to eat somewhere in the region of 4000 calories a day to maintain his weight. If he drops below 3500 for a couple of days he looks skeletal. That’s medical but he complains a lot about not being able to put on weight which is understandable in his situation.

A friend has a similar issue for a couple of years due to her thyroid. She literally ate packets of mars bars to maintain her weight most days. Thankfully they managed to balance the medication out and she’s much happier now.