To ask people to show a little more understanding to those not wearing masks

[Fuckinellitsme]

Apologies for another mask thread.

First of all, I'm not an 'anti masker', I absolutely see the need and the importance of wearing them. I'm unable to wear one myself - I have trigeminal neuralgia and when I've tried to wear one, the resulting attack has left me bedbound for days. I want to wear one, but I can't. I also have rheumatoid arthritis so I'm incredibly grateful to all the people who do wear masks, therefore protecting others and especially those in higher risk groups (though not vulnerable enough to be shielding) like me.

However. I've seen some truly awful comments on here in the last few days directed at those who don't wear masks. We should be treated like lepers if we enter a shop without one, for example, or should be banned from them outright. And we ought to stay at home if we are exempt, not use public transport or go shopping or go to work. We have 'made up' health issues and disabilities and are 'woe is me' 'snowflakes'. I've also encountered bus passengers passing comment and tutting about my lack of mask.

Those of us who can't wear a mask (and are acting within the law/guidelines, being exempt) still need to go about our business. It would be lovely if we could do so without fear of comment or judgement. I understand that there will be those who don't wear a mask because they just don't want to - however, please, if you see someone without a mask (particularly if they're wearing a sunflower/exempt lanyard) try to be understanding and give them the benefit of the doubt.

The nastiness and ableist comments on here (and elsewhere) in the past few days have been genuinely upsetting for those of us unable to wear masks. Please don't assume we're all stupid/selfish/conspiracy theorists/don't care about your health, or that it's a choice. For many, choice doesn't come into it.

A bit of empathy goes a long way, especially in these weird times.

[Fuckinellitsme]

@HeIenaDove that is absolutely outrageous. The driver was absolutely not allowed to deny travel. Disgusting.

[Floatyboat]

What did people do in ww2 with gas masks I wonder? I wonder how people didn't want one of them available to them just in case.

[Xenia]

You had to carry your gas mask at all times (although rarely had to put it on) but that is not quite as big an issue as just a matter of having it with you although even then there were nosy parkers who got very full of themselves who had to check up and took huge delight in catching people out. nothing much changes.

[Fuckinellitsme]

@Heyhih3

Realistically how many people are describing what you are though? If that’s the case for you it must be really awful. It’s not the case for MOST people who can wear a MASK but would rather not wear one. I honestly don’t mind what some else does but just as they are responsible for their own actions it’s up-to the individual.

We're not talking about people who can wear mask but would rather not. We're talking about the millions of people in the UK who suffer from disabilities (hidden or not)/health issues/psychological issues such as PTSD which prevent them wearing mask/face covering.

[HeIenaDove]

Eh? Ive not read every post here but i can see there have been disagreements and would just like to say that @Hearhoovesthinkzebras was very helpful to me on another thread and told me about something id never heard of that would help re wearing of face masks.

[Fuckinellitsme]

@Floatyboat

What did people do in ww2 with gas masks I wonder? I wonder how people didn't want one of them available to them just in case.

This has already been covered upthread.

[BamboozledandBefuddled]

@Floatyboat

What did people do in ww2 with gas masks I wonder? I wonder how people didn't want one of them available to them just in case.

In WW1, many soldiers would actually rip their mask off during a gas attack, due to the incredibly high levels of anxiety they experienced. They, along with many other veterans suffering from shell shock - PTSD as we now know it - had no interest in gas masks in WW2.

[MarshaBradyo]

TN sounds so very difficult, just reading about it the drug they usually use helps 80 to 90% of people (quick read only). I hope it helps you op, the pain sounds debilitating.

[Fuckinellitsme]

As a reminder before this thread fills up, there's a new one here which already has lots of useful stuff on it.

[Dinosauratemydaffodils]

What did people do in ww2 with gas masks I wonder? I wonder how people didn't want one of them available to them just in case.

Having worn a gas mask prior to being choked and suffocated by my rapist, I can honestly say that it would take either a similar amount of violence to what he deployed or serious drugs to get one on me these days.

When I was very ill in march with a horrendous cough, breathing difficulties and a fever I made dh put it in writing that he'd make sure I wasn't put on a ventilator or oxygen if he called an ambulance and I wasn't capable of advocating for myself. My youngest child wasn't even two at that point but I would have rather died with no treatment than had to deal with something over my mouth/nose.

[Fuckinellitsme]

@MarshaBradyo

TN sounds so very difficult, just reading about it the drug they usually use helps 80 to 90% of people (quick read only). I hope it helps you op, the pain sounds debilitating.

I take Tegretol when my disease is active and it does help a bit once it kicks in (it can take around six weeks to do so). Over time all drug therapy becomes less effective and the next step is surgery on the brain stem, to relieve the pressure on the trigeminal nerve. It does carry the risk of stroke/paralysis and isn't always effective, but when it is several years without pain can be achieved. Eventually though the condition returns and will get progressively worse.

Not a particularly sunny outlook

[Floatyboat]

Congrats on the 1k thread op. Remains an unfulfilled ambition to get one myself.

[Dinosauratemydaffodils]

Having worn a gas mask prior to being choked and suffocated by my rapist, I can honestly say that it would take either a similar amount of violence to what he deployed or serious drugs to get one on me these days.

Didnt word that well at all. Gas masks played no part in my attack, I just had an interesting childhood where I got to try modern military ones more than once.

[Sleepyblueocean]

"Legally yes, but morally I think people should do their utmost to not except themselves if possible. Its for the protection of society."

So how much suffering is in your opinion an acceptable amount to say someone has done their upmost. Please give examples.

[DappledThings]

@Floatyboat

Congrats on the 1k thread op. Remains an unfulfilled ambition to get one myself.

There definitely should be some kind of badge that appears next to an OP's name if they are a member of the 1K club.

[Floatyboat]

I made dh put it in writing that he'd make sure I wasn't put on a ventilator or oxygen if he called an ambulance and I wasn't capable of advocating for myself.

For that to have weight you'd need to write it yourself and possibly get it witnessed by a solicitor I think. Doctors don't generally listen to husbands requesting their wives are denied life saving treatment!

[Floatyboat]

@Sleepyblueocean

Well it varies obviously depending on the issue and severity. So for TN where a shoulder supported screen, for claustrophobia maybe a hat visor, for breathing problems maybe a loose scarf. I'm sure for some of the more psychologically based problems there may not be a single practical solution that would help.

[claireb707]

[quote Floatyboat]@Sleepyblueocean

Well it varies obviously depending on the issue and severity. So for TN where a shoulder supported screen, for claustrophobia maybe a hat visor, for breathing problems maybe a loose scarf. I'm sure for some of the more psychologically based problems there may not be a single practical solution that would help.[/quote]
Jeesus yiu really don't get it do you?

How many more times do the op and other people have to say there isn't any option before you understand it and have some empathy for them 🙄

[Dinosauratemydaffodils]

Doctors don't generally listen to husbands requesting their wives are denied life saving treatment!

It was a bit of a desperate knee jerk reaction. As a fit and healthy woman in my early 40s, I wasn't expecting those things to be even a possibility until in a matter of days I went from being able to sprint up three flights of stairs to be struggling to breathe walking slowly up one flight. Felt like I was wearing a corset laced far too tight.

Formalising it is something I will look into once things have relaxed however.

[Fuckinellitsme]

[quote Floatyboat]@Sleepyblueocean

Well it varies obviously depending on the issue and severity. So for TN where a shoulder supported screen, for claustrophobia maybe a hat visor, for breathing problems maybe a loose scarf. I'm sure for some of the more psychologically based problems there may not be a single practical solution that would help.[/quote]
Please understand that those who are exempt are exempt for a reason. We are not expected to wear face coverings by the government, transport companies or shops - so we do not have to be placed under physical or psychological distress to wear one because you expect us to. Please can you also stop implying that we're not trying hard enough, and could wear a covering if we really wanted to.

[LangClegsInSpace]

I don't know you're specific circumstances

Yeah, you should have just stopped there.

[LangClegsInSpace]

[quote Floatyboat]@Sleepyblueocean

Well it varies obviously depending on the issue and severity. So for TN where a shoulder supported screen, for claustrophobia maybe a hat visor, for breathing problems maybe a loose scarf. I'm sure for some of the more psychologically based problems there may not be a single practical solution that would help.[/quote]
'Have you tried drawing one on with face paint?'

[LangClegsInSpace]

@Floatyboat

What did people do in ww2 with gas masks I wonder? I wonder how people didn't want one of them available to them just in case.

My mum never got the hang of breathing through her gas mask. During practice at school she used to slide a finger beneath the seal to create a breathing gap.

It's a good job there weren't any gas attacks or I might not exist.

[HeIenaDove]

@ItsNotJustAboutYou Ive seen suggestions aimed at ppl on a low income that they should just cut up a sock for a face mask Looking at the inside of my own socks they are full of thicker almost hairier wool. Surely this is harmful
Socks arent made for the face, they are made for the feet.

[WiddlinDiddlin]

Id be exempt too (I checked with my heart nurse), having tried it, wearing a mask affects my breathing to the point I suffer palpitations (heart problem) and get very wheezy/congested - prolonged use would put me at higher risk of a heart attack as a result.

Fortunately for me I can limit how much I go out, and wear a mask for the short periods I am in a shop etc, so that is what I will do.

I feel for those who cannot limit how much they go out, AND cannot wear a mask as without some sort of official ID, they are going to suffer some abuse, whether its in the form of dirty looks or actual verbal abuse (though i suspect even with some, that might happen).