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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To say if they mandate mask wearing they need to ensure some way for the exempt from masks to prove it?

743 replies

BuffaloCauliflower · 13/07/2020 13:28

I am not anti-masks at all, I can see they are often very useful tools in infection control when used correctly (though it doesn’t seem they are by many people) but as someone ‘officially exempt’ from wearing them - in my case due to asthma - I’m increasingly panicked at the thought they’ll be made mandatory in shops and other places.

I have been able to avoid public transport thankfully due to furlough/wfh but I’ve wanted to shop, help the economy etc. and I fear I’ll have to stay away completely if masks are mandatory because I don’t think my exemption would be believed, or that I wouldn’t have people having a go at me for being out without a mask. I’ve tried many times to wear them and they make my symptoms (already far worse than usual due to pregnancy) ramp up even more. It’s very distressing, especially as it causes coughing, and I’m then removing the mask (touching the mask and my face, definitely not mask best practice) repeatedly to try and regulate my breathing. I’m following all other guidance sensibly, lots of hand washing, keeping my distance from others when out, but all things considered I think I’m more risk to others in a mask than without one should I be carrying CV.

I am very worried that despite being exempt I have no way to prove it to shops or other businesses. I carry my inhalers but that relies on others understanding, the government have previously said there won’t be anything official to prove exemption, though public transport companies have come up with different options (I’ve printed the TfL card just in case, but technically anyone could do this as it’s not verified) I’ve already been told once that someone ‘didn’t agree’ with exemptions to mask wearing and I should basically suck it up. People who want to be mean won’t check for exemption before having a go I’m sure of it.

But at the very least shouldn’t they ensure there’s some official way I could prove my exemption, a letter or card I could apply for from my doctor perhaps, that’s recognisable to others so I’m not at risk of not being believed or being yelled at? There are many people who will be in the some position.

OP posts:
vanillandhoney · 13/07/2020 20:04

@whattimeisitrightnow

Honestly, I think even if official exemption cards were a thing, the arseholes who want to publicly shame people not wearing masks would do so regardless, especially as some of the reasons are things like PTSD/trauma triggers and autism, which people already criticise and doubt the existence of.
Yeah, sadly I agree with this. It's like people who receive PIP or DLA and look "well" on the outside.
GreytExpectations · 13/07/2020 20:04

It's funny that so many other countries seem be manage wearing masks without this level of hysteria.

ForeverInSunshine · 13/07/2020 20:05

Also should have said, I have very bad pollen allergies and the masks do make it more irritating and make me sneezy and want to cough but it's for the good of everyone and I don't think I'm above that. I want this whole thing to end quickly so my life can go back to normal and we can see family.

vanillandhoney · 13/07/2020 20:06

OP, I'm also pregnant, almost 6 months. And where I live masks have been mandatory for all outside & inside activity since April. It's also summer, so hot and humid, yes it sucks, but it's not the worst thing. There are also NO medical exemptions and without a mask you are not allowed in supermarkets, shops or at the hospital. I feel much happier when I do have to go out, because everyone else is complying. Not sure why the U.K. is so weird about masks.

I hate this. Fuck the disabled, fuck those with autism, fuck those with PTSD or trauma complications or COPD. They can just stay inside and rot.

PhilCornwall1 · 13/07/2020 20:06

@BamboozledandBefuddled

If anyone challenges me for not wearing a mask, they'll get one of two responses. Shop staff, police, etc would be shown proof of exemption. Anyone else will get a polite request to show me their ID, confirming that they hold a position giving them the right to stop and question me. At that point, I'd suggest busybodies should just walk away. I don't mind if they mutter or tut as they go.

Instead of a need for a single proof of exemption, I'd say there's a greater need for some people to leave their jackboots at home when they go out.

The Corona Stasi are polishing them up as we speak.

One or two on this thread have them all ready to go by the looks of it.

vanillandhoney · 13/07/2020 20:07

@GreytExpectations

It's funny that so many other countries seem be manage wearing masks without this level of hysteria.
Or you just don't hear about it because you don't live there.

Or, more likely, those people are all stuck inside because they're too scared to leave their homes.

EveryPlanetHasAYorkshire · 13/07/2020 20:08

@GreytExpectations

It's funny that so many other countries seem be manage wearing masks without this level of hysteria.
The people who can't wear masks probably don't leave the house now. You might be okay with that but I'm not.
BankofNook · 13/07/2020 20:10

It's funny that so many other countries seem be manage wearing masks without this level of hysteria.

People who are unable to wear masks exist in other countries too however you don't see them as they're at home, excluded from society due to the restrictions imposed by their disabilities.

Just because you don't see disabled people doesn't mean they don't exist.

Original poster
BuffaloCauliflower · 13/07/2020 20:15

@ForeverInSunshine are you asthmatic and do masks cause extreme increases of your asthma symptoms leading to coughing, wretching and dizziness? If not I’m not sure what your point is?
I’m not ‘being weird about it’ for goodness sake, it causes a real, physical problem with my breathing. It’s not being pregnant in and of itself that’s the issue, it’s that pregnancy has caused a big asthma fluctuation for me. If I was where you are I guess I’d never be able to leave the house. I’ve had to wear a mask for hospital appointments as that’s been unavoidable, it’s been quite distressing, as I have described in multiple other posts you’re welcome to read.

OP posts:
Original poster
BuffaloCauliflower · 13/07/2020 20:16

@GreytExpectations I’m sorry you think it’s hysterical to not want to have an asthma attack every time I leave the house

OP posts:
Dinosauratemydaffodils · 13/07/2020 20:18

it's funny that so many other countries seem be manage wearing masks without this level of hysteria.

Based on the couple of international trauma groups I'm in, there is plenty of "hysteria" in other countries too. Heard some horrific stories including women planning free births because they can't access medical care without a mask easily. My own GP is chasing me for a face to face appointment...to the point she went to my psychiatrist behind my back. She doesn't get it, I can't see her right now, doesn't matter what's wrong with me.

Meredithgrey1 · 13/07/2020 20:22

It's funny that so many other countries seem be manage wearing masks without this level of hysteria.

I find it hard to believe there aren't similar (valid) concerns on a Spanish version of mumsnet or whatever.

BamboozledandBefuddled · 13/07/2020 20:22

@GreytExpectations

It's funny that so many other countries seem be manage wearing masks without this level of hysteria.
Yes, it's really very tiresome and unnecessary. Perhaps the mask-maniacs could just calm down and get on with their own business and leave other people to mind theirs.
PhilCornwall1 · 13/07/2020 20:26

I find it hard to believe there aren't similar (valid) concerns on a Spanish version of mumsnet or whatever.

Mamásnet.com? Hmm

Drivingdownthe101 · 13/07/2020 20:28

@GreytExpectations

It's funny that so many other countries seem be manage wearing masks without this level of hysteria.
Do you read international press? Forums? Social media? My IL’s live in Spain. People there have the same concerns as here.
canigooutyet · 13/07/2020 20:28

Weird isn't it, any time anything gets mentioned to do with disability, some have the automatic response in wanting it also be acceptable to demand personal details.

Before masks it was certain seats on public transport, accessible toilets etc. Demands to make them wear something, make them show their medical details.

I tell myself when I'm out in public mn also has posters who log everything with the police just in case. And if it was their mil asking to know their personal details they would be told to fuck right off.

CaffiSaliMali · 13/07/2020 20:36

[quote BuffaloCauliflower]@GreytExpectations I’m sorry you think it’s hysterical to not want to have an asthma attack every time I leave the house[/quote]
This is why people with asthma don't have to wear a mask if they find doing so affects their asthma.

3 people die of asthma attacks in the UK every day on average. Asthma attacks are life threatening, they can, and do, kill.

I have only needed emergency care for my asthma once. It was awful, I was so frightened and I wasn't at full on attack level yet.

I am not risking a potentially life threatening asthma attack by wearing a face covering when I know they start to affect my asthma in a matter of minutes. Fuck that shit.

ForeverInSunshine · 13/07/2020 20:36

Also should have said, I have very bad pollen allergies and the masks do make it more irritating and make me sneezy and want to cough but it's for the good of everyone and I don't think I'm above that. I want this whole thing to end quickly so my life can go back to normal and we can see family.

ForeverInSunshine · 13/07/2020 20:50

[quote BuffaloCauliflower]@ForeverInSunshine are you asthmatic and do masks cause extreme increases of your asthma symptoms leading to coughing, wretching and dizziness? If not I’m not sure what your point is?
I’m not ‘being weird about it’ for goodness sake, it causes a real, physical problem with my breathing. It’s not being pregnant in and of itself that’s the issue, it’s that pregnancy has caused a big asthma fluctuation for me. If I was where you are I guess I’d never be able to leave the house. I’ve had to wear a mask for hospital appointments as that’s been unavoidable, it’s been quite distressing, as I have described in multiple other posts you’re welcome to read.[/quote]
I'm not saying that your asthma isn't problematic to you. Clearly it is. I've stayed indoors since March unless I'm wearing a mask. I live in a small flat and have been working from home, yes it sucks not being outside. But getting the virus will be worse.

Yes where I live there been plenty of discussions about masks, and who is wearing and not wearing them. But it's not been to the weirdness level of Mumsnet. It's like the British public are against masks on principle when they actually are helpful during a global pandemic.

SoFloofy · 13/07/2020 20:55

@WhoWants2Know

I don't find the asthma exemption odd because I personally am ok with a mask.

As I said in my post, I find it odd because the asthma nurse, who presumably is an expert on asthma, has always advised wearing a face covering in triggering conditions, to reduce the risk of attack.

Bit late to this, but a GP advised me to inhale steam from a boiling kettle when I was struggling to breath (and later went on to have a full-blown asthma attack). Problem is, my asthma is exacerbated by humidity. So I obviously ignored his advice. I've also actually had an asthma nurse tell me that exercise is not a trigger for me, when I know that it is. Not everyone with asthma has exactly the same triggers. I've practised with a mask and the increase in humidity I was breathing in was noticeable. I have no doubt that it could be a significant factor in causing an asthma attack in similarly affected asthma sufferers.
GreytExpectations · 13/07/2020 21:29

[quote BuffaloCauliflower]@GreytExpectations I’m sorry you think it’s hysterical to not want to have an asthma attack every time I leave the house[/quote]
I'm sorry you don't seem to be able to comprehend properly. Nobody is telling you that you have to wear the mask, the government says you can be exempt, so what's your problem with that?

marinintheuk · 13/07/2020 21:30

I bet if someone was chucking toxic gas around the county you would be crawling over each other to reach a gas mask.

Now that is something that is difficult to breath through instead of a couple of layers of paper or cloth.

Drivingdownthe101 · 13/07/2020 21:31

@marinintheuk

I bet if someone was chucking toxic gas around the county you would be crawling over each other to reach a gas mask.

Now that is something that is difficult to breath through instead of a couple of layers of paper or cloth.

I’d have a panic attack if I had to wear a gas mask too.
GreytExpectations · 13/07/2020 21:31

For those who can't wear a face mask, what's your medical objection to a face sheild, that doesn't even touch your face?