AIBU - Child friendly kids menu...

[Blearymorningeyes]

Is there such a thing as a "child friendly" kids menu? Surely all kids menus are child friendly?!

I invited my SIL to my favourite Mexican restaurant for my birthday. She has 2 DC, ages 4 and 7.

I sent her the kids menu to look at, which has mini versions of Mexican fare such as fajitas, nachos and enchiladas, plus some "plainer" things too, such as chicken breast with mash. She just messaged me saying "Hi Bleary, can we please choose a different restaurant, because the kids menu doesn't really look very child friendly?". I feel sad as I and was so looking forward to going to this particular restaurant for my birthday and I don't see why her kids wouldn't like at least one thing on the menu - it's pretty standard, isn't it?! By "child friendly" does that translate to "It doesn't have sausages/fish fingers and chips"?

AIBU in thinking that my birthday restaurant choice shouldn't be changed because of this?

I hate confrontation... Help!

Good reply.

If it was just you and SIL having a lunch date at which the kids came along, I'd be a bit more inclined to choose somewhere else - only because 2 whingy kids can dramatically alter your enjoyment of a meal if there's just 2 adults!

But if she & kids are just part of a bigger group, then no, of course it's massively cheeky to even THINK they should be the deciding factor in where to eat!

Any Mexican place will do plain chicken, wraps, cheese and some sliced peppers or cucumber. No biggie.

Plus often times the childrens menu the sausages are awful.And i would rather go to MacDonalds for the chicken nuggets.#

My kids will eat most things,and we order them an adult meal,as theres not much difference in price.

Some kids menus are horrible. I remember going out for a big family Christmas meal when ds was about 3. We booked him for the turkey, stuffing etc and was offered fish fingers and chips or a burger and chips as they assumed that children wouldn’t eat ‘adult food’. I was surprised and my mum took charge and asked for a caller plate with everything on it.

It all depends on how much you want your SIL and children at your birthday. I get how much you want to go to a certain restaurant however, personally I try to choose places where I feel everyone would eat.
I have one of those ‘fussy’ children and it’s really not at all easy. I believe my child’s fussiness comes from sensory processing difficulties, and it’s incredibly hard-work to get him to try different food. My other child however will try virtually anything.
At the end of the day, it’s your birthday so you get to choose.

I really hate the stereotype that British kids will only eat sausages and nuggets while kids around the world have sophisticated adult palates.

It's a stereotype trotted out by smug parents who want to show off that their precious darlings love to eat spaghetti alle vongole or similar.

You replied very well!

QuoteBlearymorningeyes Mon 13-Jul-20 12:10:34
Just to clarify, I'm not at all blaming parents for their fussy children! I just meant that restaurants should offer more choice so that kids are encouraged to branch out if they wish!
.....
Mexican restaurants have a huge range of dishes. I bet the children will find things they like, it would be difficult not to.

I always find these posts odd. As the host do you want your guests to enjoy the meal too or as the host do you want to prioritise what you like? Is it more important to eat Mexican food or to know your SIL and her DCs can come and enjoy the food?
Your SIL isn't being a cf. She let you know her preferences. You then, as an adult, decide whether her preferences matter to you.

When we lived in Mexico my dd's favorite meal was buttered spaghetti which most restaurants made for dc.
Although she would also snack on a quesadilla if need be.

Don't change the venue OP, the dc will find something to eat.

She’s a cf for sure. I have a very fussy, dairy and soya intolerant 2 year old but we still manage to find stuff he’ll eat. I’d be chuffed you wanted my kids there in her boots to be honest

Your SIL isn't being a cf. She let you know her preferences. You then, as an adult, decide whether her preferences matter to you.

Of course shes a CF.Theres no allergies and her kids eat fajitas at home.Shes just being awkward.

Its the ops birthday,she gets too choose.So either the sil comes or she doesnt.Her choice.

@BakedBlossoms

I really hate the stereotype that British kids will only eat sausages and nuggets while kids around the world have sophisticated adult palates.

It's a stereotype trotted out by smug parents who want to show off that their precious darlings love to eat spaghetti alle vongole or similar.

Not really - when we were kids there just wasn’t really this option everywhere. I was a kid in the 70s/80s. You didn’t even get smaller portions then either (from what I recall) and if you went abroad you just ate what everyone else did.

My kid certainly isn’t a ‘precious darling’ and are anything (except chocolate) when he was little.

YANBU my DC are really fussy eaters so in this situation I'd either go without them or I'd order the thing they'd be most likely to eat, expecting them not to eat it, and take some snacks in my bag for them. I'd never ask the person whose birthday it is to change their choice of restaurant for my DC.

Not being unreasonable at all. My 3 year old loves Mexican food.

I'm always slightly disappointed when you go somewhere nice and their children's menu is "something beige/fried and chips". DD will eat those kinds of foods but I always think going to a restaurant that does a particular style of food is a good opportunity to let them try that. DD would certainly be stealing from my plate if she thought mine looked more interesting!

@Blearymorningeyes

Just to clarify, I'm not at all blaming parents for their fussy children! I just meant that restaurants should offer more choice so that kids are encouraged to branch out if they wish!

I completely agree, @Blearymorningeyes. When our boys were small, it irritated us so much that the only options for children were nuggets/fish fingers/burger/pizza and chips. I don't have anything against these foods (I enjoy them myself, on occasion) but not every single time I eat out!

It was especially noticeable on holiday, when we ate out quite a lot, and got sick of the same children's menu everywhere we went. In the end, we started getting a single portion of an adult meal, and sharing it between two of the boys (this was when the youngest was still too small for this option - he got jacket potato and cheese, which was easy to mush up for a fairly newly weaned child).

Good reply. They can eat before and have dessert or there’s probably a starter they will eat - garlic bread or chicken strips. My daughter has food sensory issues but we manage.

Do your young relatives a favor and expand their palates. It is a gift to expose them to new foods and experiences.

It's a much better kids' menu than 99% of the ones in France

That’s funny, because Côte, the french restaurant chain in England, has such a fantastic children’s menu! It’s just a mini of what the adults have. Eg delicious creamy chicken etc. They also have one of the best colouring/sticker situations I’ve seen, but that’s just a bonus 😬

@AnneOfQueenSables I'm actually a very open and relaxed person and of course I want my dinner guests to enjoy the menu. However, I feel like on my birthday I would like to treat myself to a meal at my favourite restaurant AND be surrounded by my loved ones. I picked this restaurant because it has a huge variety on the menu, so I didn't expect SIL's reply at all. If the kids won't deal with a cheese quesadilla, chicken with mash, nachos or rice, I have no idea where else would satisfy their appetites anyway!

I’m a bit confused about PPs declaring their DCs couldn’t eat anything ‘of that menu’. The OP hasn’t given the menu, just examples. You have no idea whether there’s something there your D.C. would eat, surely?
OP -your message to SiL was perfect.

YANBU. Kids menu = load of processed shite (plus chips) that has fuelled obesity in this country. Stick to your guns!

Well unless the Mexican restaurant do pizza or wagamamas I can safely say there is nothing on that menu my 2 boys would eat.

That’s ridiculous.

I’m pretty relaxed about food with mine. Sometimes they are fussy and sometimes they aren’t. I wouldn’t hesitate to serve something adventurous and I wouldn’t rule out any kind of restaurant but equally I wouldn’t insist they eat something they didn’t want to.
I’d bring a sandwich and a banana for the car if I suspected they might not want the food.

I don't have kids so this is totally new to me. Argh!

In that case I'd make it adults only. Dining out with young children isn't actually all that fun.

It's a tricky one but unless you have a fussy eater I don't think you can understand how very not fun this is as a proposition. Because instead of enjoying your food you have to deal with a bored child who's not eating. Been there, got the t-shirt multiple times. And I really like my food so it is particularly galling not to get to eat it! Your SIL has simply been honest. Also, although the MN massive will jump on me, I can think of quite a few older adults of my acquaintance who wouldn't be delighted to be offered Mexican cuisine. It is a relatively recent arrival in the UK.

“You then, as an adult, decide whether her preferences matter to you.”

She did and they don’t. Tough tits sil.