AIBU - Child friendly kids menu...

[Blearymorningeyes]

Is there such a thing as a "child friendly" kids menu? Surely all kids menus are child friendly?!

I invited my SIL to my favourite Mexican restaurant for my birthday. She has 2 DC, ages 4 and 7.

I sent her the kids menu to look at, which has mini versions of Mexican fare such as fajitas, nachos and enchiladas, plus some "plainer" things too, such as chicken breast with mash. She just messaged me saying "Hi Bleary, can we please choose a different restaurant, because the kids menu doesn't really look very child friendly?". I feel sad as I and was so looking forward to going to this particular restaurant for my birthday and I don't see why her kids wouldn't like at least one thing on the menu - it's pretty standard, isn't it?! By "child friendly" does that translate to "It doesn't have sausages/fish fingers and chips"?

AIBU in thinking that my birthday restaurant choice shouldn't be changed because of this?

I hate confrontation... Help!

@Zhampagne
I'm not working and when I'm at work it's one to one I listen and I'm sympathetic and supportive and my clients aren't ridiculing my food choices for my children because I don't discuss my personal parenting decisions as we use research and clinical guidelines.
You'll never convince me that macdonalds is suitable for toddlers because it's recipe is designed to make it appealing to children in particular.
** They keep you coming back with quick-acting energy that will never fill you up, and even though the food is calorie-dense, it won’t fill you up, because it doesn’t have nutrients!
That, combined with aggressive advertising, can worsen those cravings even more. And that’s exactly what those corporate bigwigs are hoping for*
I would never be critical of parents giving whatever a child will eat for a very short period of time but all those saying their toddler will only eat macdonalds what have they done when it's been shut over lockdown?

@rayoflightboy

And surely it's better they eat McDonalds than eat nothing at all.
Why is macdonalds the only option if your child won't eat?
You do realise they were closed for a least 8 weeks during lockdown and in some countries they don't have "happy meals" I'm not blinkered I'm just not stupid there is always something else to offer your toddler.

@ComeOnBabyPopMyBubble

Mine was also a crap sleeper. And a (really ) late talker, SALT involvement.

I win at crappiest parent ever, somehow she's still alive and doing quite well.

Sorry, @ComeOnBabyPopMyBubble - I am afraid that award is MINE!

When ds1 was going through the terrible twos, and I was pregnant with ds2, we had an awful morning where ds1 had been screaming solidly for 45 minutes (after a 90 minute tantrum the night before), and I was on the phone to dh, in tears, telling him I couldn’t cope - when it went quiet.

I ended the call and went to investigate - to find ds1 at the kitchen bin. Dh and I had had tortilla chips the night before, and hadn’t finished them, so the leftovers were thrown away - and ds1 was eating them. That was what had stopped the tantrum.

But that isn’t the bit that wins me the Worst Parent crown - that was when I looked at ds1, enjoying his tasty bin-snack, and realised that he’d start screaming again, if I deprived him of it - so I let him carry on! Once he got bored and wandered off, I did empty the bin and find a place for it where it would be out of his reach, but still...

He had no nasty after effects from his snack, and is now nearly 27, hale and hearty, and eats pretty much anything.

Sorry you’re both wrong. The crappiest parent award is mine. They eat fuck all, they never sleep (midnight most nights), all 3 still co sleep, neither boys can read or write and they watch tablets for at least 8 hrs every day. But if that can make other people feel smug and superior then at least there is some good coming from it. You’re welcome.

My friend’s daughter barely ate. She ended up with a PEG tube. In the period where they were trying to get her food intake up, she was taken off every day at school to the school office where she was fed a doughnut - so full of sugar and fat - because she would eat it, no one else in the school was allowed them during school hours, and her NHS paediatrician had recommended it.

@Temp123999 I don’t doubt for a moment that you see a lot of kids with poor eating habits because of their parents, because there are a lot of people in the UK who eat dreadfully. My concern is for your tone on here. You say when you are with parents you are empathetic and supportive but you’re giving zero evidence of that on this thread. Many parents on here have talked about their worries about their fussy eaters, their efforts to make it better.

As you’ve never had fussy eaters yourself perhaps you can’t understand the gnawing anxiety as your child refuses food over and over. My child eats mainly Yorkshire pudding and gnocchi, bananas and breakfast cereal. Our dietician said that was OK, and a wider selection of food than many. If I put him in front of a plate of sushi every day, he would have a meltdown every day. (But for smug points, his sisters both love it.)

Like many people I’ve had some horrible encounters with health professionals, health visitors, teachers etc who have clearly not given a toss about how people experienced them professionally. I really hope you display more kindness in your work, and really do recognise when a child is not just being badly parented.

I really didn’t mean to make you feel bad, @MrsKoala - sorry.

And for the record, I think you are doing a bloody amazing job.

Haha. I don’t feel bad and you’ve been lovely. Dont worry about it. Having fussy difficult kids is my base line. To me it’s normal. It’s only when I come on MN that I realise how different it is for other people. I’m absolutely certain I’d be one of the ‘I did everything right which is why my kids eat/sleep etc’ if I was fortunate enough to have a child which did those things In fact I think this is my punishment for thinking those things before I had kids.

I can easily see why someone who has a fussy bugger would immediately think ‘oh fuck’ when extended a nice invitation - rather than gushing about how excited they were about it. It doesn’t necessarily make you a bitch.

I'm replying for the last time as my posts have been taken out of context.
Fussy eating is a problem but when investigated by health professionals lots of times when children don't have allergies, autism, SEND issues the parents need help and advice.
Lot's of parents of neurotypical toddlers don't have the patience or cooking skills to make a simple meal for a 2 year old, scrambled or boiled eggs, omelette, pasta or rice with plain ragu sauce or macaroni cheese all pretty simple plus cheaper than takeaways and as public health professional that's what I do and the families I see enjoy and engage with are NHS Public Health Service.

Kids are all different. Mine ate most things so restaurants weren't a problem. He had a few dislikes but they were easily avoided. However a little girl up the road ate nothing! I mean, nothing. She drank milk. If her parents offered her bread she would say, "A butter sandwich", and nibble a tiny bit. It was a terrible worry for them, they took her everywhere, yet somehow she grew, was well and eventually did start to eat.

Another child I knew would eat nothing except fish fingers and chips for years. He's well in his forties now and has good health so he grew out of it.

Both sets of parents prepared good meals and they'd all sit at the table to tuck in together but it just didn't work for those kids.

I agree with those who say a McDonald's is better than nothing. I'm sure if a child doesn't eat you'd be glad to see them have anything. Children can get away with eating a bizarre diet and usually outgrow and adjust later.

If the op's nieces/nephews don't have particular needs they are bound to find something on that menu to suit them. There's always fruit and ice cream.

I have several friends with children with eating issues. Only one of them doesn't have some form of spectrum diagnosis - and she was probably the worst of them all. She had to be tube fed from a few months old because she was a food refuser, and she's still very tiny and quite picky now. No real reason was ever found for it, but her mother was driven near demented over it and would have fed her anything, anything for her to just eat.

But I think we've wandered somewhat off-topic - the thread was about CF SIL, not about fussy children.

[quote Blearymorningeyes]@drinkfeckarsegirls Sorry to disappoint, but my birthday isn't for a couple of weeks! Will definitely pop back for an update (unless SIL provides an update before that)

I think it's rather surprising how this thread has evolved. I'm not the thread police, but here is my stance:

If little Timmy in Swansea was hand reared on artisan cheese and organic vegetables and helps bake his own bread every day, that's fine by me.
If Jessica in Swindon is going through a tough patch and her favourite food is chicken dippers and chips, that's fine by me.

Just be nice to each other, as we don't know the circumstances!

Restaurants should offer more choice in general, so that kids aren't offered the same fare everywhere they go. Most of us wouldn't like that as adults, so why presume that kids do?![/quote]
How did the meal go, Bleary?

@RoseHoadley

Hi, do you realise you have posted on a zombie thread?