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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU - Child friendly kids menu...

488 replies

Blearymorningeyes · 13/07/2020 09:19

Is there such a thing as a "child friendly" kids menu? Surely all kids menus are child friendly?!

I invited my SIL to my favourite Mexican restaurant for my birthday. She has 2 DC, ages 4 and 7.

I sent her the kids menu to look at, which has mini versions of Mexican fare such as fajitas, nachos and enchiladas, plus some "plainer" things too, such as chicken breast with mash. She just messaged me saying "Hi Bleary, can we please choose a different restaurant, because the kids menu doesn't really look very child friendly?". I feel sad as I and was so looking forward to going to this particular restaurant for my birthday and I don't see why her kids wouldn't like at least one thing on the menu - it's pretty standard, isn't it?! By "child friendly" does that translate to "It doesn't have sausages/fish fingers and chips"?

AIBU in thinking that my birthday restaurant choice shouldn't be changed because of this?

I hate confrontation... Help!

OP posts:
SnickettyLemon · 13/07/2020 20:27

@AnneOfQueenSables. As the host do you want your guests to enjoy the meal too or as the host do you want to prioritise what you like? Is it more important to eat Mexican food or to know your SIL and her DCs can come and enjoy the food? Your SIL isn't being a cf. She let you know her preferences. You then, as an adult, decide whether her preferences matter to you.
What is a host supposed to do in a situation where everyone has different preferences? It would not be possible to accommodate everyone's choice. I assume that the SIL is also an adult, she should consider the host instead of her children, who I sure would want to go to their own choice of X and chips are us on their own birthday.

Original poster
Blearymorningeyes · 13/07/2020 20:43

@JRUIN Not at all - I said "I Hope" rather than "you must come" . I'm not out to force anyone and she knows me well enough to know that. I think I was very nice about the whole situation!

OP posts:
Original poster
Blearymorningeyes · 13/07/2020 20:47

Okay guys... She replied!

"Awwww OK Bleary, I guess I can ring if it's not just the stuff on the menu and whether they can improv a bit for them if that makes sense, they're just in a very fussy phase and was thinking it would be easier to find something I know they'd like but never mind xx"

I think I'm just going to leave it now and not reply presuming they're going to come unless otherwise stated. The response seemed quite self centred to me, but could have been worse I guess!

Oh and just to clarify it's not just me and them going to dinner.

OP posts:
Coronabegone · 13/07/2020 20:50

@Blearymorningeyes I think you should reconsider, do McDonalds still do the parties on the train.... the fussy kids may prefer that! You'll get a crown, a McFlurry and everything!!

Original poster
Blearymorningeyes · 13/07/2020 20:53

@Coronabegone As long as I get a Beanie Baby in my Happy Meal... I never got the full collection when I was 10!

OP posts:
Cheeseislife2020 · 13/07/2020 20:54

It’s daft I don’t even know why kids menus exist really except for smaller versions and less spice. Is the kids menu expensive? My friend won’t go for a restaurant with ‘expensive’ kids menus - anything more than £4.99 for a meal, dessert and drink and she’s on about it being a rip off. Whereas I’d rather pay more have nicer food, and not chicken nuggets and a scoop of cheapo ice cream

SerenityNowwwww · 13/07/2020 20:54

[quote Blearymorningeyes]@Coronabegone As long as I get a Beanie Baby in my Happy Meal... I never got the full collection when I was 10![/quote]
I once got the equivalent of a fatwa from the Beenie babies...

MrsKoala · 13/07/2020 21:02

I think that was a nice response from her, not self centred at all. She’s just explaining why she mentioned it, which means she has to talk about her reasons. she’s probably a bit anxious they may not like anything and will be difficult, which in turn may not make a nice atmosphere for your birthday and everyone else there and be stressful for her.

Frankola · 13/07/2020 21:06

Either she doesnt like it and is using the kids menu as an excuse. Or her kids like eating bland food.

Either way she's being selfish

aSofaNearYou · 13/07/2020 21:09

I agree with you, her response does read like she has her nose out of joint and is trying to pretend all is fine whilst passive aggressively making it clear it isn't. I just wouldn't rise to it as you said.

Marmite27 · 13/07/2020 21:10

Mine would rip your arm off for anything Mexican. YANBU. It’s your birthday, go where you like.

Original poster
Blearymorningeyes · 13/07/2020 21:12

I just felt like she was immediately defensive (although I get she wanted to explain) and didn't go on to say anything nice about coming to celebrate, which is quite surprising, but maybe I'm just reading too much between the lines....

Still going to leave it there I think.

OP posts:
Original poster
Blearymorningeyes · 13/07/2020 21:13

@Marmite27 I feel like I've inspired a lot of people on this thread to cook Mexican food tonight - at least 3 so far I think! 😂

OP posts:
JRUIN · 13/07/2020 21:15

I don't think her reply was unreasonable or self centred at all. She is obviously worried that her kids will be bored and may start whinging and ruin the meal out for everyone. I get the impression you don't think much of your SIL OP.

LittleDonk · 13/07/2020 21:19

Truthfully I think she's cheeky as fuck.

This occasion is not about her kids. I can't believe she'd want someone to change the venue of their birthday meal because a pair of fussy kids aren't keen on the food. She should either get a babysitter, have them come along and have just a dessert, or decline the invite.

Hopefully she'll look back and cringe at herself.

Original poster
Blearymorningeyes · 13/07/2020 21:22

I think very much of them, thank you! I just thought she would have expressed a bit of positivity towards the event in the message, hence why I said I thought that it was a bit self centred

OP posts:
Original poster
Blearymorningeyes · 13/07/2020 21:24

@littledonk Thank you - that's exactly my line of thinking! I go to plenty of restaurants that aren't my favourite choice of cuisine (including the ones SIL chooses incidentally), so if I can do it, I'm sure her kids can!

OP posts:
MrsKoala · 13/07/2020 21:25

She might be caught up in imagining the stress it will be. Personally I’d rather chew my own arm off than take my 3 to a restaurant for a meal they wouldn’t like and would be expected to take their time over while adults were having a leisurely celebratory meal. But I’d feel it was my duty to try and I’d be so stressed I’d probably not sleep the night before and get myself all worked up about it. I doubt she wants to be like this. Most people want to have a nice time and relax.

InescapableDeath · 13/07/2020 21:27

She can find things it’s easier for them to like when it’s their birthday...

midnightstar66 · 13/07/2020 21:31

@MrsKoala honestly I'd just give them an iPad and relax

Xmasbaby11 · 13/07/2020 21:32

My kids are fussy and I would never demand your venue change on their account! She is being too demanding and there's nothing you can do if she isn't prepared to be flexible.

Enjoy your birthday!

rayoflightboy · 13/07/2020 21:34

She might be caught up in imagining the stress it will be. Personally I’d rather chew my own arm off than take my 3 to a restaurant for a meal they wouldn’t like and would be expected to take their time over while adults were having a leisurely celebratory meal. But I’d feel it was my duty to try and I’d be so stressed I’d probably not sleep the night before and get myself all worked up about it. I doubt she wants to be like this. Most people want to have a nice time and relax.

@MrsKoala she doesnt have to go though.

When you have kids you just accept you cant go to everything.And this is oneof those times.

Reject it with good grace.Dont make a song and dance over it.

NinjaNic · 13/07/2020 21:36

OP you are a better person than I am. I would not bother to reply to your sil, what a bitch. Maybe I'm autistic but whatever, it's your birthday!

MrsKoala · 13/07/2020 21:37

Yes, of course. I agree. As I said I’d either not go or feed them first. I’m just trying to see how she might have got herself worked up and now can’t see past her own anxiety about it all. Doesn’t make her horrible and selfish, just a bit stressed. Just a possible point of view.

JRUIN · 13/07/2020 21:39

I think very much of them, thank you! I just thought she would have expressed a bit of positivity towards the event in the message, hence why I said I thought that it was a bit self centred

What's she got to be positive about? Having to drag kids out to a, no doubt, long drawn out event where they can't even enjoy the food AND having to fork out for the privilege sounds like my idea of hell. To be honest unless I was really close to my SIL I wouldn't have even invited her. Is it a special birthday or something?

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