The fucking seagulls have seized my garden and won't let me in it

[ShriekyBastards]

Stupid twatting seagulls have had babies that are wandering aimlessly around my garden and I get divebombed by the parents if I dare step foot out there. Two days of gorgeous sunshine and I can't let DS play out there because they wouldn't stop flying at our heads and I genuinely think they would attack us if I hadn't gone back inside ran away screaming. Can't even let the dog out for a wee and have to put him on lead, and drag DS down the road every time he needs to go. They woke DS (who usually sleeps 7-7) up at 4am this morning, so we're all knackered and grumpy but seriously. Why are they protected?! Stupid sky rats

Sorry for the shit link

The fluffy little prick is still out there. 3.30am they started screaming today, and instantly DS was wide awake thinking it was morning. Threw the whole day out of whack. Dog looks highly unimpressed about being dragged down the road in the pissing rain rather than just having a wee in the garden. Any cuteness is lost to the sheer fucking annoyance.

It's looking me right in the eyes in that pic. Challenging me with its fluff covered evilness to dare use my garden so it's mum can peck my brains out.

@ThisShitDontMatter

Hate the bastards! 3am seems to be their favourite time too! Had I known (aswell as other things) this place we live was plagued by them it would have been a big fat no.

I had DS1 in the middle of a heatwave in the wee small hours of the morning in a hospital with a LOT of urban gulls on the roof and every window was open to try & combat the heat. MIL said a few years ago: “ooh, I get all misty eyed when I hear gulls because it reminds me of the night DS1 was born.” (She was one of my birth partners.) I said it still gives me the rage, as I was in for a week and between the women screaming and groaning in the delivery suite, the newborns on the postnatal ward and the effing gulls I barely slept a wink.

That looks very fluffy to have left the nest. I wonder if some are still in the nest, do you know where it is ? If it survives ( is the other still there ?)
then it will be growing flight feathers and hopefully be able to take off in a week or so.
I like gulls, although Greater Black Backed Gulls ( the ones most likely to eat rabbits or pigeons whole) are pretty savage predators.
Gulls are excellent parents, hence the protectiveness.

Umbrella.

happened to friends of ours last summer. Nasty birds. But you're totally fucked until the babies can fly.

all birds are protected while they are nesting and raising young.

Just be brave and stick your arm in the air, they won't come within reach of your arm. We have this every year, they used to terrorise one of our cats - sensible really as that WAS the cat that would have had them for breakfast given half a chance.

This year they don't seem to have managed to raise babies - I'm feeling quite sad, even missing the dive bombing!

Awwww. The way he’s looking at over at you. It’s as if he knew you were taking his picture.

@TheSpottedZebra
The eyes don’t work!!

Just be thankful it’s not Aussie magpies- m.youtube.com/watch?v=YGGTcYfrEZU

OP. That’s not cute - that’s a mouldy dodo.

Umbrella sounds like your only weapon - paint a giant owl on it?

Totally missing the point of the thread, but just to be a pedant, they are not evolved pterodactyls as stated above. They are evolved dinosaurs, from the same family as the t-ex. Pterodactyls were not dinosaurs.

When you look a full in the eye, you can see that they are dinosaurs!

Urban Gulls are doing OK but numbers on the coasts have crashed, most likely due to lack of food.
Lack of food? That's a laugh, now that takeaways have reopened there's a plentiful supply of chips and ice creams to steal.

Vicious bastards.

Totally missing the point of the thread, but just to be a pedant, they are not evolved pterodactyls as stated above. They are evolved dinosaurs, from the same family as the t-ex. Pterodactyls were not dinosaurs.
I'd rather have an angry T-Rex in my garden than a shitehawk.

Our seagull overlords allowed us a lie in until 4am this morning.

Cant believe people are encouraging bb guns.

Basically you cant do anything while they have young, all the things people suggest such as water pistols, birds of prey and discouraging them is unlikely to work while they have babies. Ethically you cant really force parents to leave their babies and if you managed it then you've essentially killed their babies.

Living in a coastal town i do sympathise with you! Umbrellas in the garden, and it wont be too lkng before the little ones have fledged.

Is the one currently on the floor able to fly? If not, returning it to a nest should lessen their ferocity.

Oh god this just happened to us on holiday. They’d had babies on the caravan opposite and they went mental attacking any dog that walked past. Clearly not an smart bird unless they presumed a dog could pole vault on the roof 🤨 I feel for you anyway. I hope your captors fuck off soon!!!

I'm sorry OP, this thread made me giggle a bit. There's actually quite a tame small one on our street, doesn't seem to have any friends, so I say hello little one as I walk past

“ARGH!!! THE EYES DONT WORK!!”

I’ve seen that before but it never fails to crack me up

That looks very young. They really need to be close to adult size before they start flying. You most likely have several more weeks of this.

Scoop them up and shove them over the fence. Have an umbrella and goggles on. They are nasty bastards.

When you look a full in the eye, you can see that they are dinosaurs!

They have dinosaur feet too

This thread has provided me with much hilarity. I don't live near to the sea, so don't have the bastards here. They would terrify me though.

we've got them here, they are just flying, shitting, noisy argumentative arseholes. The chicks look a bit cute and fluffy at first until they start on that noise like nails down a blackboard.

Anyway, we had 2 chicks on our roof until 2 days ago when one fell off and got hit by a bus outside the house. As a vegetarian, I shouldn't be glad about the loss of an animal life. However...

My ds has one near his flat that has singled him out to be dive bombed. I didn't believe him till I saw it myself.
I live in a seaside town and they're a nuisance. I've had them swoop down and take food straight out of my hand. There's notices everywhere telling people not to feed them because they can be very aggressive.

Fucking shitehawks are a pain but I couldn't kill one.

@Frownette

I'm sorry OP, this thread made me giggle a bit. There's actually quite a tame small one on our street, doesn't seem to have any friends, so I say hello little one as I walk past

🥰🥰🥰