To feel like the only person following the f***ing rules??!!

[Stressingismyhobby]

I know the social distancing rules are contradictory, confusing and mostly bollocks but I don't think I'm above them and follow them as closely as possible.

But hardly anyone else I know does. I've just seen a picture of a friend wearing a mask in a taxi...to go to her friend's house with a load of other friends. All pictured together huddled on the sofa.

A family member keeps posting pics on FB with her kids gathered with all their friends.

And I've been invited to a party in a week's time at someone's house with lots of other people.

Videos of kids running to hug both their grandparents (my kids would love to do that!)

We met with some friends outside a week or two ago who also (without us knowing) invited other people so our group was bigger than 6.

I had to say no to giving someone a lift in my car the other day.

And so it goes on.

I feel like I'm the boring, goody two shoes who's always having to decline invites or say things like "I'm not really sure we're supposed to do that yet" etc only to be met with sighs or rolled eyes. I'm constantly being put in situations that make me feel uncomfortable. I'm made to feel like the bloody fun police who is making live difficult for everyone!

Anybody else feel like this???

I'm following the guidelines. But still I have been criticised - I've been told by a family member that I'm 'selfish and irresponsible' because DH and I went to a restaurant for a meal. There are too many people either following 'rules' that don't exist any more or making them up in their own heads.

I'm socially distancing, wearing a mask when necessary and fanatical about hand hygiene. That's all I can do, I can't control other people's behaviour and it's a waste of time and energy to try to.

OP, stop worrying about what others are doing. You can't change them. Focus on doing what you feel is right for you and for the wider society.

I mean, YANBU of course but it is about using common sense as well. I have a friend like you who is adamant that everyone must be at least 2m apart at all times and would never dream of meeting up for a 2m distance walk with more than one other household (I'm in Wales and the rules are still one household). Even though logically, it would do no harm for that particular situation eg meeting up with two individual friends from two different households for a walk. That would do literally no harm.

I would do (and have done) the above, I also don't bother with social distancing for my four year old from people I know don't mind. He has been inside one friend's house on two occasions (downstairs only, and mainly in and out to use the toilet but once they did sit and watch TV for a bit) and has hugged the same friend a few times.

However I'm not having loads of people flocking to my house, in fact only three separate people have set foot in my house since lockdown and that was to quickly use the toilet right by the door. When I hear of people going on public transport to sit inside a friend's house, with a load of other friends, I do eye roll a bit. But we can only worry about what we do, and we all have different ideas of what we think is sensible/low risk for us.

@Stellakent I'm pretty sure the restaurant owner didn't think you were selfish. I think the people who are refusing to get out and start spending are the selfish ones to be honest but each to their own 🤷‍♂️

Totally agree OP. Can’t even read all the posts on here as the comments p* me off so much from people making up their own rules. Literally been gobsmacked by the utter stupidity and selfishness of others (including people I’d considered good friends and family) over the past few months. For my own mental health and sanity I am sticking to the guidelines and keeping my immediate family safe. It’s all you can do.

Some rules don't make sense to me. I'm in Scotland and shops have been open for over a week now but only yesterday we were told to wear face masks. Why not from as soon as they opened, or all the time in supermarkets? Also, we are only supposed to meet a certain number of other households outside with distancing but I was at a kids farm park yesterday with hundreds of other households. How is that ok?

I feel confused about why some things are ok but others aren't.

There is a spectrum. Even in lockdown there were people that took things to extremes and made up extra rules and people that took the piss.

I’ve mainly followed the guidance but have had closer contact with parents. I will also not enforce social distancing with my children now but will use hand gel, wipes etc after going to the playground and try and avoid too much toy sharing. I think the majority of people have interpreted the rules and adapted some.

I think the people going to raves etc are taking the piss but I also think that people frowning upon people going out according to the guidance are also going to a different extreme.

@Atadaddicted

You would hate me OP!

What? Why would OP hate you? Are you one of the dickheads I saw on Facebook at a birthday party last week, hugging etc?

I followed the rules strictly until about 4 weeks ago, now I’m back to normal life. I’ve gave people lifts. I’ve been in peoples houses. I was at a bbq last night. My kids have had friends over for sleepovers.

Normality has to return at some point.

But what are the rules ? Like seriously ?
I’m so confused now
I’m in quarantine as I travelled overseas but have lost all sight of this now

Completely agree with @LettyBriggs

I don't feel the only one, but still feel it is not too late to sack Dominic Cummings for not following those at the end of March and in April.

I disagree with LettyBriggs

My parents are elderly, I'd like to be able to see them without worrying that I could be asymptomatic and pass it on to them, even if I'm not affected.

And new evidence shows long lasting effects on people who only had it mildly.

So I'm continuing to be sensible.

I went to the hairdresser this week. All the stylists obviously had to wear masks or visors. I was the only customer wearing a mask. I thought the others were incredibly selfish. The stylist wears a mask to keep the customer safe - why wouldn't you extend the same courtesy to them.

Some of the guidelines don't make much sense. For example, to stick to the six people limit, I would have had to ask my friend to leave one of her twins at home. Not only would that not have been possible (too young) how would it have reduced the risk of our two households meeting (outside, socially distanced). So we met as a group of seven and I'm comfortable with that. Far more risky was going to the hairdresser, which was completely within the rules.

I agree, OP. I find it difficult to keep social distancing, but I move away the moment I realise I’m too close. And I’ll soon be starting to forget what friends and family look like if I haven’t seen them on Zoom. I wear a mask, although I hate covering my face.

But I’m not surprised many aren’t being responsible, when the government has been so irresponsible — never closed the borders, let the virus run wild, do a sudden U-turn and we can’t leave our houses. Then all the muddled messages: go to work, don’t go to work, etc.

And after the Dominic Cummings debacle, I can understand why people are saying Boris’s friends can do what they like so why shouldn’t we.

We’re still doing it, dh was shielding and we need to look after ourselves.

New cases are consistently around 500, There will be loads more but they aren’t diagnosed.

Yanbu we’re still following rules. People think they’re invincible. I don’t want another lockdown. They’ll be the first to moan when it happens.

Most of the 'rules' are guidelines not written in law and throw away the keys type rules.

Yes, but it’s shocking how many people don’t even follow those. I’ve been shielding from my job as a dementia care worker. My residential home rang to ask when I can go back. None of the staff whilst at work wear a mask, apron or any other recommended PPE during their shift (apart from toileting when they wear gloves and apron) In fact, they’ve never worn any since lockdown began as they’ve never had any suspected cases so they’ve just kept to the hand washing routines. When I go back, I will be the only one who will be in full PPE at all times because I can’t social distance in a care home.

We are shielding till September at the earliest I’ve devised my own ‘plan’ In Case there’s a second wave as I’m not being part of it neither are my children
Dh still off work, will not send dc back for first couple weeks of school either
We haven’t been to any shops etc and I’m not risking it

While it's true that there may be people who had a mild form of the illness who have long term effects, there are also people who may have had it and not known. I have friends who this week had an antibody test. Four of 6 people tested positive. None of them have been unwell or had any symptoms. It really is a lottery.

[quote labyrinthloafer]@magesticallyawkward All democracies have laws. I disagree with plenty of the ones we have![/quote]
And that's normal, but there is a difference between 'i don't agree with this law' and the government arbitrarily putting massive restrictions on the entire populations freedoms.
Those very freedoms that allow you to disagree with laws or policies and op key discuss that. What the OP and other fanatics keep talking about is something akin to North Korea.

And* not key

I agree 100% with you OP. Both of us are looking at getting a prolonged anaesthetic. Later this year for me and Spring for DH. The thought of catching C-19 and not being able to have surgery/anaesthetic due to lung damage would destroy the rest of my life and his. As a result of this 'vanishingly small' (not my words) risk, we are going to continue to shield. If it takes another two years or longer, I don't care. I am not prepared to take any risk I do not have to.

I went to the hairdressers this week. Was asked to bring a mask and was told all the rules. When I got there they removed their masks, someone different washed my hair when they said only one hairdresser would be in contact with me. They said I could take my mask off too- I declined.

I agree with you OP.

All the people who say live and let live/ don’t stress about what other people do - what we do impacts everyone, we’re all interlinked, the millions who’ve been infected from possibly one animal in China proves that!

I’m not vulnerable and if I caught it I doubt I’d pass it onto anyone else vulnerable.

But I care about the care worker on the bus who picks it up from the person who thought they’d make their own risk assessment, and who then brings it into a care home.

I care about all the sacrifices people have made with their loss of income, jobs, their businesses. Their mental health. You are throwing that all away if we are back to a full blown outbreak.

Don’t think they won’t lock us down again, although maybe individual areas. Look at Melbourne. Look at spiralling cases in southern USA.

How hard is it to stand at more than a meter when you’re chatting outside the school gates, instead of face-to-face? Or to brave a little drizzle and sit in the garden instead of inside?

Coronabegone - I thought the r rate in Cornwall was rising?