To feel like the only person following the f***ing rules??!!

[Stressingismyhobby]

I know the social distancing rules are contradictory, confusing and mostly bollocks but I don't think I'm above them and follow them as closely as possible.

But hardly anyone else I know does. I've just seen a picture of a friend wearing a mask in a taxi...to go to her friend's house with a load of other friends. All pictured together huddled on the sofa.

A family member keeps posting pics on FB with her kids gathered with all their friends.

And I've been invited to a party in a week's time at someone's house with lots of other people.

Videos of kids running to hug both their grandparents (my kids would love to do that!)

We met with some friends outside a week or two ago who also (without us knowing) invited other people so our group was bigger than 6.

I had to say no to giving someone a lift in my car the other day.

And so it goes on.

I feel like I'm the boring, goody two shoes who's always having to decline invites or say things like "I'm not really sure we're supposed to do that yet" etc only to be met with sighs or rolled eyes. I'm constantly being put in situations that make me feel uncomfortable. I'm made to feel like the bloody fun police who is making live difficult for everyone!

Anybody else feel like this???

[dayslikethese1]

So are people saying they wont SD now? It's gone from one extreme to the other on here. In April ppl were berating you for buying wine as it's not essential, now ppl are saying they're ignoring all the guidelines

[caringcarer]

@Oblomov20, my children can't see grandparents because they are dead.

[Coronabegone]

@caringcarer what a totally irrelevant and strange comment!

[ZombieLizzieBennet]

@QueenofmyPrinces

The main thing that is advised still not to do is meeting more than 2 households inside your home.

Yet last night I went out for a meal in a pub and including my table, there were 6 tables in our relatively small part of the dining area, and all of them were full. There were also four members of staff based in our eating area.

Admittedly the tables were probably 1m apart from each other but I was still in an indoor venue, in close proximity with approximately 25 unknown people for two hours.

It is the absurdity of this being ok, whilst being told that I can’t go and sit in a room with my sister if my mom is already in there with her, that makes compliance with the guidelines very frustrating.

There’s just very little sense to it.

Yep. This lack of logic plus the government's clear willingness to wipe their arse on the regulations when it suited can't do other than undermine compliance.

I'm now permitted to take public transport, and I'm mask exempt, to a shopping mall to buy things I don't need. I could touch loads of merchandise while I'm there, not like anyone would stop me. I could go to a pub and drink enough/be around people who have drunk enough that failure to adhere to SD is a certainty. Soon enough I'll be subsidised to sit in a restaurant with, as you say, lots of other people indoors.

It's fine for me to do all of those things, the Treasury will even pay part of the costs if I do one of them, despite the clear risks. I accept that the intention here is to benefit the economy and save jobs Fine. In my case, I don't want to do any of these activities because of the risks. But with all this in mind, there's not a chance in fucking hell I'm not going to have both my brothers round at the same time to sit on the garden if I want.

[lcl]

Oh my god I’m so irritated by the total lack of consistency !! Our kids have missed out On 4 months of education and yet I had to listen to the idiots in our local running wild on Saturday night in the pub beer garden.

[nether]

Some people were buying w one people are nitnsocial,distancing.

Most of us are in the middle - yes get the wine and chocolate when you're doing your necessary shopping, and yes stay 2m away from strangers.

And don't expect hugs or other contact to be welcomed, without checking.

Thatnway the mutually consenting can do what they want, but do not stop others from having theb2m they need

[Stellakent]

But if you're only getting wine and chocolate when doing necessary shopping etc, at what point will you start to live normally again? Yesterday I walked into town, had a look around the shops where I bought some shoes in the sales, a swimsuit in M&S and a lipstick. Not many cafes open, so I bought a sandwich in M&S and a takeaway coffee from Pret and sat in the park and read my book while I ate lunch. I then got a bus to a pub and sat in the garden in the sunshine with a friend and had a couple of glasses of wine. I then walked home.

All of this was done whilst socially distancing. I used a mask on the bus, as required, and paid with contactless. All of this was entirely within the 'rules' and I had a lovely time. The risk was minimal at this point.

[SengaStrawberry]

I agree people should be following the rules but no one here knows enough to confidently say there will be a second wave and how bad it will be, I find presenting this as fact a little bit off.

[nether]

Good for you StellaKent

The advice changes so we can do to the shops for the first time on 1 August. That is also the date that food parcels will cease (though we have a delivery slot, so that will, it impact on us)

Visits to non-essential shops are not mentioned, so I am assuming they will be off indefinitely, though a further update to guidance is expected just before 01/08.

That is how limited the world is for the children and adults who are in the shielding list (and will be the first dragged back inside if case number start rising).

We feel the effects of deep, long, isolation, and need to be able to go out and about a bit.

To be safe enough, we need 2m including when outside.

Is it really so difficult to keep 2m away from strangers?

[Stellakent]

Nether please accept my apologies, I did not realise that you were shielding. That is of course different and I hope that when you are able to go out again that people around you behave in a responsible way.

My concern is that there appear to be a lot of people, not shielding, who are fearful of going out and think that lots of people are breaking the rules. Whilst there are some people who are behaving like idiots, there are millions of people resuming their lives and adapting to a new 'normal' in a responsible way. While it's summer and we can do many things outdoors it is a shame that some people are being frightened by what the see in the media and read on the internet.

[nether]

Sorry Stella

I realise now that it came across all wrong.

I m genuinely pleased that people's le can go out and about, and theb'good for you' was meant kindly (didn't get tone of that remotely right)

I did want to point out that there are over 2.5 million required to shield, that life is much narrower and I can see why. But it will be forced to be even narrower than it has to be, if 'keep 2m away from strangers' message is lost

You would not guess out household contains a shielded person by looking at us - people or need to stay 2m away from everyone they do not know. So to give us the space we need, people need to give everyone that space (unless/until there is mutual consent to do differently)

[Margerine78]

Definitely YANBU.

People who are bending the rules severely are being reckless and probably realise it deep down, so they're telling you you're being uptight (or whatever) to defend their own actions. Classic projection, crappy but try to ignore them. You're being safe for the yourself, your famiy and the greater good, that's what we're all meant to be doing.

[MummyMayo1988]

YA(definitely)NBU
We feel very much the same!
We live over an hour away from all of our family and travel back every month or so to see everyone. We were due for a visit the weekend lockdown was announced. We haven't seen anyone the whole time.
When the guidelines - finally - changed we contacted our families and said we'd like to come down. Explaining that 2 households of any number can finally meet.
DH mum was soo happy - it had been 20 weeks since we saw her.
My mum on the other hand was happy but invited a child (that she looks after during the week) over and my sister who still lives at home brought her new BF round to meet us. We had no where else to go and didn't really feel we had a choice in the matter. Her house - her rules 🤷‍♀️🤦‍♀️
We did however state that the kids could hug everyone but NO kisses on the face/hands and we were able to (somewhat) social distance.
Our neighbours out back - who say its not safe to send the kids back to school - have been in and out of eachothers houses and gardens the whole time and have had BBQ's and parties most weekends. All the neighbourhood kids have played together.
I (abd our children) cried a lot not being able to see our families and having to watch them ignore all the advice/guidlines.

I just feel very much like now its relaxing; people think it's over. I've been slowly filling up our larder again (no hoarding - I'm talking 1-2 tins a week as we used it all during lockdown) as I'm expecting a second wave and full lockdown again.
People just don't seem to understand or care?!

[Noextremes2017]

What is so special about a ‘second wave’? The virus might well be around for years. We all have to learn to live with risk.

[BillywilliamV]

You do realise that it is everyone's benefit that the government get the economy working. People on here behave as though they were some sort of Victorisn workhouse committee, carelessly exploiting people to line their own pockets! Its really not the case!

[luckylavender]

@EnlightenedOwl - I am so very fed up of the argument which you are peddling which suggests some people are less important. You can judge a society & a person by how it treats the most vulnerable.

[luckylavender]

@UmbrellaHat - it takes 3 weeks for a spike to show.

[Tootletum]

Yes. I hate all the rules, still follow them though.

[TazSyd]

@luckylavender

I think I have understood @EnlightenedOwl posts differently from you.

My understanding is that she is making the point that older and those with underlying conditions (ie more vulnerable to covid) aren’t more important than younger people. What we’ve done is trash the economy at the expense of younger people’s life chances (financial stability and increased MH problems - that we will start to see) in order to protect older people.

I think @enlightenedowl is just saying why are those who are at lower risk from covid being treated as though they are less important than those who are at higher risk from covid.

I think we are only seeing the beginning of what the lockdown has done to younger people - less opportunities for school and uni leavers, jobs lost left, right and centre, financial problems, which will all impact on mental health as well.

[EnlightenedOwl]

[quote TazSyd]@luckylavender

I think I have understood @EnlightenedOwl posts differently from you.

My understanding is that she is making the point that older and those with underlying conditions (ie more vulnerable to covid) aren’t more important than younger people. What we’ve done is trash the economy at the expense of younger people’s life chances (financial stability and increased MH problems - that we will start to see) in order to protect older people.

I think @enlightenedowl is just saying why are those who are at lower risk from covid being treated as though they are less important than those who are at higher risk from covid.

I think we are only seeing the beginning of what the lockdown has done to younger people - less opportunities for school and uni leavers, jobs lost left, right and centre, financial problems, which will all impact on mental health as well.[/quote]
My point exactly

[SengaStrawberry]

I agree @TazSyd.

[luckylavender]

Unless we get on top of this virus globally then we're all in trouble for a long time. @EnlightenedOwl has made a lot of rude comments about all sorts of people & my comprehension is good. Too many people who think they're exceptions, who use their own common sense will spell long long problems. The virus hasn't gone anywhere, look around the world. And alienating people is not how a civilised society should behave.

[luckylavender]

And if we really cared about prospects for the young, we would have put far more effort into getting schools open before pubs & the like.

[TazSyd]

alienating people is not how a civilised society should behave.

Mass unemployment and no career options for people who have worked hard to ensure they have those options, is a great way to alienate people.

[Noextremes2017]

The Government have handled the crisis in a textbook way - the text being ‘How NOT to handle a pandemic’.
As said above - the terrible consequences of the lockdown will only start to emerge in the next few months. At which point Johnson & Co will come in for huge criticism and will just blame ‘the science’.
The NHS was hopeless before the pandemic and will, unfortunately, be even worse afterwards.