To wonder why people don’t seem to know about intuitive eating?

[sunshineonmywindow20]

I keep reading the plentiful diet/weight loss threads on Mumsnet - a range of approaches come up - low carb, fasting, calorie counting, WW, slimming world etc

But no one ever mentions intuitive eating, and I wonder why? I’ve been on numerous diets and for me it’s BY FAR the best way I’ve found to reconnect with my body, improve my relationship with food and -yes - lose weight.

I guess it isn’t always explicitly directed/marketed as a diet/weight loss tool, but for me that’s why it’s so good! It’s about enjoying food more (!) and moving towards your natural set weight, which might not be skinny, but for many people will mean they lose weight by eating in tune with their bodies (eating when hungry, eating slowly/mindfully, stopping when full).

But there are no banned foods, no rules beyond the above, it’s a happy process that encourages self acceptance and a healthy, life long change. Books wise there is a wide range - Susie Orbach, Paul McKenna, Beyond Chocolate, many more.

Diets are scientifically proven not to work long term and trap people into a cycle of misery... AIBU to recommend this to others looking to change their relationship with food? I promise I am not connected to it commercially or otherwise in any way

Didn't work for me. I can't eat when I'm hungry or when my body needs it because I can't eat at work. I eat when I can fit it in round work.

I keep track of calories and am mindful about what I eat - that's what's helped me lose weight.

@Clytemnestra2, I'm 5' 2" and a size 14 (in Dorothy Perkins), I'm obese. But that, measurement wise is a 1980's size 18. So being a 14 would put you into the overweight category, at just over 5'.

which is that eating low-carb has helped me to eat intuitively

More that eating intuitively, ie in tune with your body, feels more comfortable when you eat low carb. That's a key element of IE. You eat what makes you feel good. Theory being that when you work through the 10 steps, mentally you end up in a place where you want to nourish your body appropriately, honour your hunger etc.

I'm in the same with lower carb stuff. If I'm honest about a plate of spag bol for example, it makes me feel awful afterwards. I love it, and sometimes I might fancy it, but then I really consider how it makes me feel afterwards. More often than not, I'll have the bol on top of a load of green beans, and the cheese I pile on top was actually what I wanted for comfort. A low carb meal, because that's what really ticks the box of comfort, taste and how I want my body to feel afterwards.

Sorry OP but the way you come over is like one of those over-zealous people who has just been enlightened and wants to din this miraculous finding into everybody else.

Sorry, but that's how it came across to me as well - and tbh I've been that zealot myself. I've been on the intuitive eating bandwagon (as well as the low carb one, the intermittent fasting one and all the rest).
Intuitive eating is just 'eating normally' (in the sense of eating like a normal person should). It's a lovely idea, but if it were that easy, there would be no overweight people. It's based on the idea that your level of genuinely 'full' is the level which is optimal for you to be slim, and that your body/brain will settle to wanting naturally healthy food once you've got out of the diet mentality. But I don't think either of those is necessarily true, even for many people without a seriously messed up relationship with food.

I am torn. All of my kids (young adults and teens) would eat intuitively and tick your box. They would never finish a meal I dish up ‘I’m full’. I have one who, even though not knowing what I put in the dish, if it is cream based who literally has four mouthfuls and announces they are full.

They are fortunate however. I am obese. My job for decades involved often having no food for over 72hrs, living on coffee, then stuffing myself silly when I did get a chance to eat.

It’s not simple really.

I agree. I hate fixed mealtimes for example. I don't get hungry until around 3pm and would like to eat my main cooked meal at that time, but dh and the older dcs were horrified and wouldn't go with it. We're stuck having an evening meal around 6pm which is too late for me. The dcs inevitably seek lunch around 1-2pm, which means they're not really hungry at 6pm. We're just eating for the sake of it and it's ridiculous.

I completely agree, OP and it occurs to me that IE is very little to do with food. Fundamentally, it's about being comfortable with yourself as you are, rather than trying to be something else.

Sadly, society tells us in so many ways that we shouldn't be happy as we are, there's something wrong with us, and it can only be fixed if we spend money on xxx. That discontent it what fuels our economy - striving for a better life, better house, better body etc keeps the wheels turning. None of us are immune and it would take most people a lot of hard work and introspection to realise that and start unlearning.

But yes, diets don't work. I just smile and nod when overweight people tell me about the diets they're on because it's not a casual / superficial conversation you can have with an acquaintance.

I read a brilliant book years ago about, rather than dieting to be thin, eating to feel healthy ( so the focus was on how food makes you feel). I suppose it was about mindful eating, but also not feeling like any good was "scarce" i.e there's no shortage of chocolate cake in the world, and you can eat it whenever you like, but you are aware of the effect of the sugars on your mood and energy levels. So just tuning in to the way you feel mentally and physically, not thinking about your waistline.
I wish I could remember the name of the book! Changing my thinking about health did actually result in weight loss and I gave the book away.
Is that sort of what you mean?

“It’s not simple really.“

It’s simple in terms of, for example, the average UK woman at 5’3, weighing 70kg and only lightly active needs around 2200 calories a day to maintain and any reduction in that in order to lose weight - the smaller the reduction the longer it takes, obviously. But food isn’t just quantifiable units of potential energy is it, for some of us it’s loaded with complex feelings.

10:36ItWorriesMeThisKindofThing
Ooh...Gillian Riley, that might be the book I'm thinking of!
( I missed your post before)
Yy it was not at all about looks or weight loss. It really helped me be healthier.

I have a very very sweet tooth. If I was allowed to eat when I was hungry I would simply eat biscuits cake and chocolate bars to fill me up! I have to use every bit of willpower I have to avoid these foods and very carefully eat the right amounts of foods I don’t want (tuna, salad etc) if I don’t eat enough of this before I go out somewhere I will eat whatever is on offer in a cafe or similar!

@lazylinguist

Intuitive eating is just 'eating normally' (in the sense of eating like a normal person should). It's a lovely idea, but if it were that easy, there would be no overweight people.

I don't agree. Most overweight people I know in the UK (I've lived abroad where obesity is much less of a problem so the contrast is remarkable to me) are persistent snackers. They are not remotely connected to their bodies. They eat for comfort. They eat from habit. They eat junk because it makes them feel good in the moment, but then feel bad soon after. This is the opposite of IE.

Intuitive eating would only work for me if I didn't have a job that entails 12.5 hour shifts, a combination of days and nights. I eat before I go to work, when I get an official break, and after work. Like many others on this thread

Intuitive eating for me would be a luxury, and although the idea of eating what I want, when I want, sounds lovely, in practical terms, it just wouldn't work.

I tried it a few years ago - was sick of dieting, read lots of the books mentioned here. I gained a lot of weight. It just kept coming on. I have, I think, but undiagnosed, binge eating disorder, so it didn't work for me. I think I have to cut certain trigger foods out to have even half a chance of stopping obsessing about food. Overeaters Anonymous has helped with that, though it is still a struggle.

Kudos to anyone it helps, but it is not for everyone.

You lost me at 'set weight'.

there are no banned foods, no rules beyond the above, ... . Books wise there is a wide range - Susie Orbach, Paul McKenna, Beyond Chocolate, many more.

Are they short books? Why are there so many books on something apparently so simple?

Time2chsnge, but it is possible to reset your tastes, I doubt you were born with a sweet tooth, and its abit like people who hate exercise, who slowly start exercising, endure craving it - because it makes them feel good, change is possible

*end up craving it

@Macncheeseballs

Time2chsnge, but it is possible to reset your tastes, I doubt you were born with a sweet tooth, and its abit like people who hate exercise, who slowly start exercising, endure craving it - because it makes them feel good, change is possible

How do you know change is possible? You say you are naturally slim, eat exactly what you want and stay slim.

I mean, I don't actually think you're wrong, but you do speak with great authority on any thread which veers into the subject of weight loss. You, it seems, know exactly the struggles overweight or obese people go through and you know exactly how to overcome it. I was really surprised to see your username on here and to see that you are actually someone who is naturally slim, has never needed to lose weight and eats whatever they like, but just has a natural off switch.

It's great to have you share how you think, as a naturally slim person. Because that is definitely a huge part of the issue. But when you then go on to be judgemental, as you absolutely have on at least two other weight loss threads I have been on with you, it is really a bit rich coming from someone who is naturally slim.

My DH is the same btw, very slim naturally, he's never been so much as an ounce overweight. But he would never come in to a conversation where people who clearly need help with their weight are having a discussion and cast judgement on them all. Sorry if I've misinterpreted your views on the overweight. It just seems as if, if it's ever up for discussion, you are here in a flash, ready to tell fat people what's what. Which I find really strange for someone for whom weight has just never been an issue.

One of the best things about being single is that I can make a meal for my ds and if I’m not hungry, I have a tuna sandwich.

Time saved, no food eaten that I’m really not fussed about, no pressure to eat to keep someone company.

Yes hepzibah that all sounds familiar!

Another book I found helpful was Brain Over Binge as it brought home to me that sometimes when I think I am desperately craving something - it’s not really real - it’s my brain looking for a quick fix and that I can ride out that feeling and it does eventually go away. Not saying I do always ride it out but it helps me to remember to question my feelings.

@FrogmellaSlob

If you want to kickstart intuitive eating and lose weight the best way is to eat OMAD for a good couple of months. Start out eating what you would normally eat at that one meal and after six or eight weeks start to go keto within that meal. Once you are down to a weight you are happy with, stick to the keto meal but add in other things to maintain but keep those things low carb. OMAD in combination with keto over a good few weeks or months acts like a reset button. All the sweet stuff will taste awful and you can then stick to a healthier WOE.

This isn't exactly in the spirit of the intuitive eating that the OP advocates is it? Who is naturally going to eat just once per day? Sure your body may get used to it after a while but for someone whose natural WOI is to pick and snack this is completely counter-intuitive. And that's before you start on keto which again goes against many people's natural food choices.

And I strongly disagree that it is only for the privileged. I do shift work, including night shifts and am making it work. That doesn't mean I never eat junk, that's not the point, but I am more honest about my appetite and my cravings with myself and that leads, gradually, to better choices.

You can be privileged and work shifts. The argument isn't "privileged people don't work shifts" it's that "shifts are often conducive to a lifestyle where eating what you want, when you want, often isn't possible.

Privilege obviously helps, even just with how obesogenic your environment is, but even where the odds are stacked against people from before birth change is still possible.

Nowhere else in life does thinking become so acceptedly black and white as around body image, health and food.

I feel bad as I thought this was common sense.

Eat when you’re hungry and don’t want you’re not.

When you’re hungry put good things in your body.

Easier said when I was living alone as cooking for others naturally makes me hungry.