I'm fat.

[Icanflyhigh]

My SIL to be tagged me in a photo today from a walk at the weekend. And I'm horrified. I am huge.
5'4" and 12st 7lbs.
I look like a barrel and I am so embarrassed I have let myself go like this. I'm unfit, fat and over 40.
I could cry.

Sounds like me. IVF meds and Clomid have blown me up like a balloon. My arms and legs are ok. My face and torso are not . It’s shit isn’t it

No point beating yourself up, you’ll just make yourself feel worse and it won’t help.

Make a plan to tackle it.

Join the club! Trouble is, I'm disabled and not able to get much exercise which makes it even harder to burn off the calories. Nightmare!

It has really crept up on me. This photo has made me shudder with embarrassment. I have to do something.
I can exercise, and I love walking, but I'm also post spinal surgery so I can't do too much.
DP is wonderful, says he loves me as I am, but I feel so unattractive.

It’s ok! Just by posting this you have made the first step! Start by cutting out as much sugar as you can from your diet and eating less processed foods
Look up primal / paleo diet and the weight falls off fast. Time to make a change in your eating and the way you live. Once you have shed a stone or two you will feel absolutely fantastic!

Me too!

I decided a couple of months ago to finally do something about my weight. I started small. Manageable things that didn’t make me feel like it would be a constant struggle, eg. Cutting the sugar out of my coffee, switching to low fat options and reaching for water instead of soda and juice. When the scales started shifting a bit it made me more encouraged to make some bigger changes.

Yes it’s hard sometimes, seeing myself in photos is also hard! Choose your hard!

Posting is the first step, if you make a change for you then it is much easier to stick to it. Make a realistic plan then tell people irl your plan, they will then help and not hinder you.

There is plenty you can do post spinal surgery. Ask your consultant (or post op physio) for things that are safe to do and you'll be surprised. You'll also make a much better recovery from the surgery than doing nothing so you'll be in their good books!

Thanks all. I expected to be told to eat less and move more.

I'm lay here with silent tears, desperately don't want to wake DP, almost 3am and I'm berating myself at being so lazy, greedy etc.

I like a drink and I know that has to stop, I also know that my diet isn't horrendous, but my portion size is.

I met DP just over 4 years ago, I weighed just under 10st then. I want to be back there before our wedding next June.

I can do this.

Come and join us on the shorties weight loss thread we’re all short, fat and old.

I can do this.

You absolutely can. Buy some small dinner plates, cut your portions, don't drink your calories, and drink plenty of water. You've got this.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/weight_loss_chat/3951057-It-s-come-to-my-attention-that-I-m-fat-Pre-obese-in-fact
This one

Don't bash yourself. You can make the changes you need. It's in your control.

Good luck, OP. Embarking on a change of lifestyle is exciting, if daunting. The good news is, if you really stick to it, and only you can determine this, you will see results.

Weight loss, I once read, is 80% diet and 20% exercise.

I think, we all know what/where our ersonal Achilles heel is, related to our weight.

Some of us eat good stuff, but eat too much of it and others, don't eat a lot but eat heavily calorific foods.
And some of us (me!) do all of the above.

Identifying your weak spots is a good start as you can then work on these.

Alcohol is a killer, diet wise.

It lowers blood sugar (so you want to eat) and it also lowers resolve (Oh, I'm fine as I am, DH loves me, etc).

You can do this OP.
Good luck.

personal not "ersonal".

I agree diet is the most important part. Increasing activity alone has never lost me weight. But on a diet I lose 2-3lbs per week. And sometimes an extra half pound if I've been particularly active that week. Overhall your eating and you'll probably surprise yourself with how quick it comes off.

Thanks all.
@madwomanintheattic I've posted on it, thank you x

No, you have fat - but fat isn’t who you are

Highly recommend Paul McKenna on this, yes really! An intuitive eating/hypnosis approach that has really worked for me (no dieting involved, you just retune to your bodies’ signals). Similar idea to Susie Orbach etc. I hate the name personally but the book I read is ‘I can Make you Thin’... I didn’t want to be ‘thin’ per se but was feeling unwell and have a lost around a stone quite quickly, am now within healthy range BMI wise.

Realised was overeating massively before, main difference now is my portions are waaay smaller, and I do a bit of exercise most days. Nothing complicated or painful.

I've gone down this year from 12 stone 1 to 10 stone 3lbs and still going. I'm 43. Definitely possible.

@Pembsgirl

Join the club! Trouble is, I'm disabled and not able to get much exercise which makes it even harder to burn off the calories. Nightmare!

Same here @Pembsgirl

I feel that way too, not brave enough to weigh myself, but I'm not getting slimmer. I really need a dog, ours died last year and I've been sad and pilled on the lbs ever since.

Well I'm shorter, older and even heavier than you. It's extremely upsetting. Especially when people tell you 'well just do something about it then'. They have no idea at all. I don't know the answer OP, but remember there's far more to you than your size.

I did the same. Looked at a photo a couple of months back and I had got fat. So I cut out sugar and can't drink due to after effects of virus. I've lost 8 Ilbs in 2 months. I'm not eating massive portions but I think the virus has effected my appetite. At the moment that's a good thing. I can't exercise much so it has to be diet controlled. Good luck. You can do it.

Lovely to know you shudder with embarrassment at yourself when I'm shorter than you and about 3 stone heavier. Clearly I'm just foul.

I'm an inch shorter and two stone heavier. I'd be delighted to get to your level of fat!

The only way I can seem to lose weight since I turned 30 is to low carb and or eat fuck all and I can't manage to sustain either for longer than about five or six months so have been losing and gaining the same stone and a half for nearly ten years.
I didn't want to go into another decade of my life hating my body but it looks like I need to learn to accept that I just can't lose weight.