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AIBU?

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Original poster

To hate the excuse “she got out before we could spay her”

282 replies

Soubriquet · 07/07/2020 13:21

With cats

It’s never, “we wanted one litter” “or we thought she would make a good mum” even though these are awful excuses its always “she got out before we could spay her and we didn’t know she was pregnant”

Someone I know, her cat has just had kittens. I haven’t said anything as it’s none of my business, but I know this would be her excuse

Seriously, spay your cats! They can get pregnant from 4 months of age. That isn’t fair to what is essentially a teenaged mum. Vets will spay from 4 months. No need to let her have a season unlike dogs

Neuter your toms. They will roam for miles fighting other males if left intact. They will stalk females and yowl for them.

OP posts:
LadyOfTheImprovisedBath · 07/07/2020 17:10

Vets will spay from 4 months

Ours wouldn't till 5 months - then they were bit unenthusiastic as they are small cats but did do them at 5 months with no problems. Wekept them in till then.

Our cats are product of a unlooked after pet who got taken in by someone else who then found her pg and found homes for all the kittens though friend and family networks.

loobyloo1234 · 07/07/2020 17:14

@vanillandhoney

Did you read my post? He hasn’t been left outside on his own to wander anywhere. So it’s the opposite of blasé funnily enough

loobyloo1234 · 07/07/2020 17:17

It’s cat proofed @SimonJT - thanks for your input. He’s been vaccinated also. They just won’t do spaying and neutering until 5 months

Topseyt · 07/07/2020 17:17

Just slightly off topic.

My friend had taken her young female cat to the vet to be spayed. She got a phone call just after she got home from the vet who would be doing the surgery explaining that it would be neutering (castration) rather than spaying because this female cat was actually a tom. Grin

A tomcat named Daisy. Not that the cat would have given a shit about that. 🤣

vanillandhoney · 07/07/2020 17:17

[quote loobyloo1234]@vanillandhoney

Did you read my post? He hasn’t been left outside on his own to wander anywhere. So it’s the opposite of blasé funnily enough[/quote]
Yes, I have read your posts. It's still blasé to let an un-neutered cat go outside. Cats can jump over walls and disappear in seconds, whether you're outside with them or not!

Two of mine go out (the other isn't neutered so stays in) and they can go from sitting calmly to out and over the wall in seconds and there's no way I could get over the garden wall to get them back! They're out and gone until they decide to come home - and they're grown adults. The kitten is much much faster and can fit through much smaller holes. If I let him out, he would be gone - no doubt about it.

loobyloo1234 · 07/07/2020 17:19

I’m not getting into who is a better cat owner @vanillandhoney like you seem to want. My point was that vets were/are not doing the operation in the normal timeframes and when it’s 32 degrees heat, it’s very hard to keep everything closed window wise, hence the first taste of freedom. 30 mins a day maximum and for me it works

ChewChewIsMySpiritAnimal · 07/07/2020 17:23

How would you know a female cat was spayed or not? My cat has very long fur and once the hair grew back after her op (keyhole so very small wound/no scar) you'd have to wait til she was in heat to find out. If you thought she was spayed you wouldn't know to be wary of it.

ginghamtablecloths · 07/07/2020 17:24

You're damn right of course OP but you're sadly probably preaching to the converted - those who need to heed the message most refuse to listen.

lyralalala · 07/07/2020 17:24

@Topseyt

Just slightly off topic.

My friend had taken her young female cat to the vet to be spayed. She got a phone call just after she got home from the vet who would be doing the surgery explaining that it would be neutering (castration) rather than spaying because this female cat was actually a tom. Grin

A tomcat named Daisy. Not that the cat would have given a shit about that. 🤣

The opposite happened to PIL years ago. They adopted a neutered male cat from a reputable rescue place. They had "him" 5 days when he gave birth to 4 kittens under their spare bed.
Yorkshiremummyof1 · 07/07/2020 17:24

I have two boys, they are nearly 5 months old and the vet categorically won’t castrate them until they are 6 months old. One of them runs out of the front door if you give him a chance and I live in perpetual fear he will get a cat pregnant although he might be too young. My other half wants him to be allowed to roam but absolutely no! Not until he is unable to create more kittens!

justtmee · 07/07/2020 17:24

I agree op. We've just rescued two gorgeous pedigree cats (yes it's possible to adopt even if you're set on a specific breed) they're already neutered but obviously they are being kept in until 100% settled. We have young children and we have not even come close to one of them escaping.
I don't doubt that accidents do happen and have probably increased due to covid and issues re getting the cat to the vet. But I do suspect lots have 'oops' moments for the excitement of kittens who then sadly end up on gumtree when they prove hard work.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 07/07/2020 17:28

Our kitties were tiny and we had to wait to slay them

That would of course have solved the whole thing - if not very kindly Wink

It's perfectly true that accidents can happen, but I'm reminded of an especially gormless mate who turned up uninvited and in tears with her cat's 4 kittens, just expecting me to do something about them. She was lucky that time because exH was a teacher, and after making her promise to get the cat spayed he homed them among his pupils

Several months later she did exactly the same thing again, only this time the answer was no. Cue hysterics ...

thecatneuterer · 07/07/2020 17:28

@ChewChewIsMySpiritAnimal

How would you know a female cat was spayed or not? My cat has very long fur and once the hair grew back after her op (keyhole so very small wound/no scar) you'd have to wait til she was in heat to find out. If you thought she was spayed you wouldn't know to be wary of it.
If you take on a cat and you don't know if she's spayed then you book her into the vets to be done. The vets will often find a spay scar, but if they're not sure then they just go ahead with the spay, and then may wall find out she's already done. There is no other way. Of course if a cat is chipped then the neutering status should be recorded on the chip details.
SchadenfreudePersonified · 07/07/2020 17:30

A tomcat named Daisy.

If he's anything like my two ginger bar-stewards, he'll be confident enough in his masculinity to cope with it.

MadameMeursault · 07/07/2020 17:32

We had our DDcat spayed yesterday! And DSCat neutered. They’re 4 months old and he’d started to look at his sister in a rather worrying way! She’s tiny and it would be awful for her if she was pregnant. We haven’t properly let them out yet. Her other 2 brothers live nearby so we wanted to be careful. YANBU OP.

minniemoll · 07/07/2020 17:33

I have two boys, they are nearly 5 months old and the vet categorically won’t castrate them until they are 6 months old.

Try a different vet - my boy was done at five months, weighing 2kg, and was absolutely fine afterwards.

OwlBeThere · 07/07/2020 17:34

My cat is 18 months and only got heavy enough to be spayed be yass she was feeding kittens fat. She’s very tiny, her kitten has outgrown her already by 3 months.

vanillandhoney · 07/07/2020 17:36

@ginghamtablecloths

You're damn right of course OP but you're sadly probably preaching to the converted - those who need to heed the message most refuse to listen.
Exactly.

Lots of posters on here are full of excuses about why it's okay for them to let their cats out when they're not fixed. Also, people pushing human emotion and morals onto their pets.

Cats don't get broody. They don't want to "experience being a mum". Feline sex is pretty brutal and not pleasant for the female on the receiving end - but too many are willing to overlook/ignore that - often willingly I think, because "aww kittens".

SimonJT · 07/07/2020 17:38

@OwlBeThere

My cat is 18 months and only got heavy enough to be spayed be yass she was feeding kittens fat. She’s very tiny, her kitten has outgrown her already by 3 months.
Your cat didn’t reach 800g before 18 months?
Gamble66 · 07/07/2020 17:38

The natural outcome of everyone spaying thier cats would no more cats except maybe expensive pedigree cats?

Alsohuman · 07/07/2020 17:38

Cats don't get broody. They don't want to "experience being a mum". Feline sex is pretty brutal and not pleasant for the female on the receiving end

How on earth can you possibly know this?

iloveeverykindofcat · 07/07/2020 17:39

@Alsohuman there are other considerations besides the fate of the puppies. I'm not trying to be sanctimonious but I'm sure you love your dog very much - I have a family member who decided to let her adored dog have puppies for the same reason that she wanted to carry on her genes. The dog was in labour for many hours and a puppy was stuck. She had an emergency c-section (££££££) and could well have died. Then she didn't recognise the puppies as hers and wouldn't/couldn't feed them. They had to be bottle-fed every 2hrs around the clock. The stuck puppy died in the birth and another died after a few days of aspiration pneumonia. Yes, the surviving puppies were adorable and went on to live good lives, but the whole experience was traumatic.

PickAChew · 07/07/2020 17:42

Many years ago but we had a cat that the vet refused to spay because she was "too young" we woke up one night with our neutered old lady going spare because a Tom had come in through the bathroom window and yes, we ended up with a litter.

I'm hindsight, it wasn't the best of vets. They botched it when they spayed one of the kittens, leaving her with an awful scar and she lost her trust in people when, before, she was the sweetest, most playful kitty imaginable.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 07/07/2020 17:45

The natural outcome of everyone spaying thier cats would no more cats except maybe expensive pedigree cats?

Given the crazy prices people are still asking for moggy kittens I wonder if that's already happening? I thought the expected "summer glut" would have pushed prices down by now, but apparently not

And no, I'm not thinking of buying one or even getting another at all - it's just something I noticed

Alsohuman · 07/07/2020 17:49

Thank you @iloveeverykindofcat. That’s my only reservation. She’s very petite and I do worry about that. She’s back at the vets for vaccination in September and we intend asking their advice, if they recommend not breeding her then she’ll be booked in to be spayed. Interestingly vets don’t seem to object to breeding in the way MN does!

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