13 year old with underarm hair

[scunner]

What do mums advise for a 13 year old girl with quite a lot of underarm hair. Not fine and fair, but dark and wiry. Should I find a cream to remove it? She is very self conscious. Any suggestions would be most welcome.

[jessstan2]

Natasha9511 Sun 05-Jul-20 20:08:23
I don’t shave because society tells me to, I shave because I love my smooth legs and rub them together like a cricket after I’ve shaved them 😂
......
I like the smoothness too, Natasha. Can't imagine having hairy legs - or armpits; you're fortunate not to have grown axillary hair.

As for shaven minge areas, that's a matter of taste. It has become more fashionable in recent years. I used to just trim up the bikini area.

There are societies where both men and women are suppose to shave their pubes every twenty eight days.

[pictish]

“You're moaning that some women like to grow their hair long yet want to remove other body hair. What would be your preference for every woman then - long body hair but a number one on the head. Would that make you happy? Or can you just accept that women have a choice over how they wish to look?”

Well said. I’m a feminist and acknowledge what has been stated here regarding societal conditioning to be somewhat true...but it’s not the whole story. People (women?) are a lot more intelligent and capable of subtlety and nuance than those posters are allowing them. Womensplaining someone’s personal decisions to them is pretty patronising.

[Woofer18]

@pictish "womensplaining" - that is a new one!

[pictish]

It’s like mansplaining but when a woman does it. To clarify.

[Woofer18]

1st time I have seen it used!

[pictish]

That’s because I made it up.

[canigooutyet]

Their hair their choice is how I've done it.

We talk about bodies including various cultural norms. Shaving equipment, various hygiene products, temporary hair colours etc all easily available and someone adds to the shopping list when these things start to run low.

I know my boys have shaved legs and pits, plus tweezed their brows and moustaches, same as the girls.

I shave for me. If the guy doesn't like it, well he can go elsewhere. When I was screwing around guys used to ask how I prefer their bodies, my preference of clean was often a surprise looool. When it comes to hair, both sexes have a preference.

It's not all down to the porn industry either. I remember hearing about the shaved bush for the first time in the early 80's from an older cousin in relation to child birth.

Late 80's/early 90's, the bush was still in porn and the sexual benefits were discussed more. Plus in some sense the hygiene side of left over urine and blood and us wanting to smell of something better than stale pee. I started maintaining the bush before I started to have sex, I washed my pits and used deodorant because I didn't want to smell of bo, some times of the month washing the bush alone wasn't enough and trimming was needed. It's not just teenage boys and men that can smell after all and unfortunately I don't have nose blindness.

[Delilah21D00LoT]

Wax or razor.

[Micah]

Today 11:08 pictish

That’s because I made it up

It’s been around for years.

[Micah]

Image didn’t attach

[BiBabbles]

scunner, By "very self conscious", do you mean she's talked about being uncomfortable with the hair or are you reading it in her body language? With the latter, I'd advise checking that is what she's self conscious about.

At that age, I didn't feel bad about my body hair (except when my mother would call me cactus legs or otherwise mock me for it), but I felt really awkward in swimsuits as I didn't seem to have the smooth silhouette others seemed to have/shown in media (I was underweight and used to feel like I had little boob bumps, rib bumps, and then sticky out hips), and it took some time to find that the right swimsuit for me is a one piece with short-like bottom, even now that I'm a healthy weight as I prefer not having any focus on my hips. I know others who were bigger than me who similarly found bathing suits seemed to highlight the parts they were least comfortable with.

For body hair, it was covered in some of the books my kids have and I waited until my kids asked. As neither their father or I shave, we didn't have anything in the house so I bought razor, extra heads, and foam. We talked through it & I shaved her the first time she sat in shorts in the bathroom. She only wanted her lower legs done at that point, but now she has her kit which she can use as she likes. We also watched this video on youtube, I think it's something like 21 ways to remove hair and had a laugh over some them - duct tape came up.

I try to make it as easy going as possible - I didn't want them to feel because their father and I do things our way that they shouldn't give different ways a try and see how it suits them -- just as I bought clippers when they wanted to maintain short hair even though their father and I both have waist-length+ hair. I don't get it, and I wouldn't be comfortable with my 13-year-old having those depilatory creams, but it's a pretty common thing to try out.

[slashlover]

@lucy132 You bumped a nearly 4 month old post to spam your shitty blog? Advanced search shows two comments, each are spam.

Reported.

[mumwon]

second electric lady shave!

[Viviennemary]

Razor is by far the quickest and best. Creams are messy and smell horrible. My mother wasn't keen on shaving said the hair would get thicker and thicker. Absolute nonsense. Same with this body hating stuff. Underarm hair is unhygenic and a trap for horrible odours. So common sense says remove it.

[Viviennemary]

What s going on now. Thought it was a genuine post. I despair.

[BiBabbles]

I totally missed that slashlover

[FantaIsFine]

I haven't read all messages but I think one huge thing my Mum did for me was tell me to NEVER shave or it will get worse. Legs or whatever.

Do encourage Epilady or similar, it might hurt to anyone who has spent years shaving but that's because it builds up the roots and then yanking it out hurts.

[MissMarpleDarling]

Razor.

[PronkWine]

Buy her a good quality razor, Friction Free Shaving blades and razor are so smooth. I was bullied badly for my (totally normal) body hair as a teen and it took me that again to get over it.

[partyatthepalace]

Get her decent razor, like Gillette Venus or something

[thosetalesofunexpected]

Hi Op
Its natural, teach her to be body cofindent..

[Redbrickwall]

Get her a nice razor, like the Venus ones. My daughter started shaving her armpits when she was 10 as puberty had hit.

[Redbrickwall]

Ps. She’s 14 now and we go to the beauty place together and get our eyebrows done, pits waxed and legs lol. Obviously not at the moment so back to shaving and plucking