Being upset after finding out former best friends DC has been take into care..

[lockdownmu]

We haven't been friends since 2013 - she flounced out of my daughter's baptism before we got to the church. But I found out the other day her DC who is a year older than my oldest has been taken into care.
She's posting on Instagram and FB all holiday memories and things.
I feel very upset and so does my DH who was fond of her DC.
She hasn't asked for help. I just wonder what if anything we can do.

Shewhomustgowithoutaname it might sound harsh to you but I am speaking from experience my ex best friend to cut a long story short thought she would come and help me with my DD my response wasn't a very nice one ,we exchanged words many years ago to the point of no return sometimes its best to keep the past in the past and just keep moving forward

Getting in touch now looks like you just want the titillation. Leave her be unless she contacts you.

One of my closest friends of many years lost her children a few years back, I was supportive and let her know I was available if she needed to talk. Although I didn’t agree with the things that led to her children being removed, I still wanted to be a good friend as many people turned on her and I knew her mental health was the biggest contribution. She withdrew and we no longer speak as she cut contact. Deep down it was for the best as I found it hard to overlook the things she’d done.
I think you should protect yourself first of all, if you get back in touch with her it may not go the way you hope and depending on why she lost her child I’d be cautious about being friends with someone who put their child in danger.
I’d email or text to check she is ok and if she needs anything to ask, so she is aware you care, then leave the communication open don’t push it/chase her etc, let her come to you. I think she’s lucky to have someone who still cares after so long, but don’t make her problems your family’s problems as you could end up hurt, particularly if she thinks you have got back in touch to be hurtful/gloat.

I was close her to children too and missed them a lot, but after this time I realise they aren’t my responsibility as they aren’t my children and there’s nothing I can do. It’s ok to be sad the child is in care, but don’t dwell on it, the main thing is the child is in safe hands now.

Ethical I have personal experience too. It is hard going to try to get women in these positions to see sense. It frustrated me to screaming point. As it is a person closer than a best friend I am not sure if I can just walk away. The past keeps recurring. I do have to protect myself as others have said but I can never forget the past

@ishith I dont think being under the control/ care is being in safe hands.