To think at 31 my friend isn’t too old to be having a baby

[Halfwayto50]

My lovely friend has recently started ttc she’s worried she’s too old and she’s going to struggle with her pregnancy due to her age. I’ve reassured her best as I can I personally had my two children at 21 and 23 so I personally don’t know what it will be like for her.

Oh boy, I must have been ancient then - 36 with DS1, 40 with DS2. Yes, the second pregnancy was harder, but everything's more difficult with a 3yo.

It is dependent on where you live. Where I used to live, it was more usual to have the first between 19-21 and have finished your family by 23-25, so against that backdrop 31 might seem old. In some areas of the country 36 is probably young.

I was 29, 30 and 34 when I had mine, and I was the first to have children from my social circle! There are many older than me on the school run.

I was 30 and 31 when I had mine. No trouble conceiving either (in fact DC2 was conceived in first attempt hence small age gap).
She will probably be ok. But of course younger ladies can have fertility issues too, so it's a bit silly to say 'of course she'll be fine'. Who knows until they try?

35 when I conceived my last 36 when he was born. Coped better than when I had my last 2 in my 20s

And when my first was born 10 years ago, at my antenatal group of 10, I was the second youngest at 30 (youngest was 24). Others ranged from 33-41.

Fertility does drop off at 30 but much faster at 35. She will probably be fine. I had my first at 31, got pregnant first month.

OP, with respect, 21 is unusually young to be having a baby.

No judgement, but your question here is loaded.

I went to NCT and at 32 I was the youngest of a group of 8. 31 is definitely not too old.

speakout I know I was young I don’t have a problem with my friends age she’s the one that’s struggling with it.

I had my first at 33, got pregnant straight away.

It’s always luck of the draw, but almost certainly no need to worry.
Dd and lots of her friends have had babies in their late 30s/early 40s.

31 is more average than 21 as done would worry that’s too young... but who cares.

some

I don't think 31 is old at all. It's the average age for women to have children in this country.

I had my youngest child at 31 I don’t understand why she’s worried silly girl

I had mine at 25,27 and 32 and have been one of the youngest mums in my baby groups each time.

25 didn’t feel too young and it was the right decision for us, but at 39 I still don’t feel too old to have another now..... it’s just that I don’t want a 4th child!

I had my 1st at 39 and my 2nd at 41!

I had one at 29 I don’t want anymore but I don’t think it’s too old. I think 35 before the worries would start.

My mother in law exclaimed I would be too old
Soon to have any more anyway - her daughter had her 4th at 48. People are odd.

I think mid-thirties is average to have your first in the area I live.
I think generally speaking the more affluent and more educated you are the later you have children.
It's not a new thing women having children in their 30s & 40s - but generally people started earlier and had more children in the past. This is still the family model in smaller countries.
But again generally the wealthier the country and the more educated the women the older they are to have their first child, and they have much fewer children.

Nah I was 31 and then went on to have another. They are now teens and are wonderful.

I had mine at 30, pregnant at 29 and on my birth notes it said "Geriatric Mother" 😑

Bonkers! Not too old. I had DS1 at 30 and DS2 at 35.

It's not too old - but I did find I was far more tired during pregnancy with the one I had at 31 to the ones I had between 21 and 24

She’s 10 years younger than I was when I had my second!