What’s most OTT response you’ve ever seen on a thread?

[MalcomTuckerisMyIdol]

(LIGHT HEARTED)

Just that really.

I think my favourite was fairly recently - CV related and one of the first responses to was “You dh is literally trying to kill you” (along the lines of not wearing a mask in the shops).

Not sure if this counts but I saw on a ‘things you hate that everyone else loves’ type of thread ages ago where a poster described dogs as ‘mindless idiots’. It tickled me so much as it was such an odd OTT thing to say. Still makes me chuckle every time I think about it 😂

Oh and, To anyone struggling with infertility, “you could always adopt.”

This is the one line I hated most when going through infertility (my DM was the worst for this, and it was made worse by the fact that she hadn't had any problem getting pregnant so she really didn't have a clue).

It's also very patronising; as my DH used to put it, 'Do they really think we don't know that adoption is an option?'

As it turned out, we did adopt in the end, and our 2 adopted DDs (birth siblings) are 11 and 8 now. But it was when we were ready to go down that road. (If you haven't yet come to terms with not having bio DC, you really shouldn't apply anyway, as social workers can spot that very quickly).

Yesterday there was a thread where the OP was in the agonising position of what to do about her dsis’s 3 children to avoid them going into care, OP already has 2dc of her own.
Quick like a fart poster jumps in, “You’ve got the space you have 4 beds and you can fit 5”. Another poster , “Take them all!” And another, “It’s easy!”

Later is transpires the dc have severe behavioural issues it didn’t dampen some people’s ardour though that OP should roll up her sleeves and raise all these children (or at least 2).
Behavioural issues apart, even if all 3 of them were as nice as pie, i’d baulk at taking on 3 extra children.

“Literally sobbing and shaking” at someone going to a supermarket to buy a bar of chocolate back in April.

Being told I was a murderer for buying an Easter egg.

@MrsSnitchnose That's true, too, re competitive overeating. There's often a weird undertone of sexism: the overfed children are almost always male, 'growing boys', teenagers who need to eat three loaves of bread a day to prevent them keeling over, 'extremely active', etc. But the responses tend to be different when the DC is female. Any female child who eats a bit too much is 'binge eating', has a disorder, needs help, and so on. It makes for depressing reading sometimes!

Re the infertility threads, I'm patiently awaiting the day when someone says "have you thought of adoption?" and the OP responds (with sincerity) "No - we haven't!! Amazing suggestion, feel like our problems have been solved!" Beginning to suspect that day may never come...

Under a previous name, I posted that I was starting an admin job in the NHS but I would have to leave in a few months as my husband is military and was due to be moved elsewhere.

I was told that I was selfish and responsible for bankrupting the NHS. For a crappy 19k a year secretarial job. Someone said they would trace my IP address and report me to HR! 😂 Someone else said why did I move following my husband around and in the war I wouldn’t have seen my husband for 6 years.

Despite the screeching and abuse I still started that job and left within a few months. I wouldn’t have let some ranting random on a forum influence my life choices. I doubt anyone in that job even remembers me now and it’s not on my CV and had zero effect on my life.

Sheikha if my dsis's children were going to be taken into care i would move heaven and earth to have them stay in the family. That's really not OTT that's what a decent family would do.

@FluffyKittensinabasket

“Literally sobbing and shaking” at someone going to a supermarket to buy a bar of chocolate back in April.

Being told I was a murderer for buying an Easter egg.

This is hilarious, yes i remember these threads early lockdown 😂

Sheikha if my dsis's children were going to be taken into care i would move heaven and earth to have them stay in the family. That's really not OTT that's what a decent family would do.

Only if you had the room, the money, the resources, the time and the experience to deal with a child with behavioural difficulties. The poster on that thread didn't. 'Decency' has nothing to do with it and is emotional blackmail. Other family members weren't stepping up either IIRC.

I am always amazed how everything on Mumsnet can be reported and the issue will be magically solved.

Log with 111, report to HR, phone social services, see a solicitor etc.

‘that’s what a decent family would do’

Stop right there. Sorry.
You have NO idea of the pressures, circumstances, mental or physical health, financial situation, accommodation set up, working hours, needs of children involved, support network or any other countless things that need to be taken into account before someone takes on another person’s children as a full time carer.
Decent family is toot all to do with it.

What a naive thing to say.

On a lighter note, not MN but on a knitting forum I asked what knitting needles I should get as my DCs had been playing around my knitting basket and broken my thin wooden needles. I got told my needles needed to be in a LOCKED cabinet (presumably in an extension I'd built in the meantime owing to lack of space for a cabinet) or my DCs would DIE.

Absolutely. Of course most people would desperately want to help, but taking in three children overnight, potentially long-term, would be incredibly difficult and not a decision anyone could take lightly.

I still maintain what i said. Rarely do children come into the world all perfevtly healthy to perfect little families with support networkw and no metal or physical problems. But you step up and adapt..if you wont or dont want to thats your choice.

Posters who suggest calling the police for every minor family argument or rule infringement.

"My teen ds slammed the door and said that he hates me"

"Call the police!"

"I saw a friend feed her toddler two doughnuts"
""Call the police!"

"My neighbour parked his car in a public street, in front of my front door"
"Call the police!"

"I would move heaven and earth to have them stay in the family"

Right, and if you did all of that and it still didn't work/wasn't possible, then what? Would you suddenly not be a 'decent family' just because you didn't have the resources to cope for an unexpected extra three people?

"But you step up and adapt..if you wont or dont want to thats your choice."

Please explain how 'stepping up and adapting' (whatever that means) creates money where there is no money, space where there is no space, mental health support for children who are likely quite traumatised after being removed from their original family, time enough for said children to be given the attention they will need...

Stop being silly Matbath. If someone with a disability can’t cope with three extra children no amount of sanctimony will help.

I was absolutely roasted just before lockdown for saying that we'd had friends round in the garden for a socially distanced cup of tea. It's possible I caused the whole pandemic.

Someone once told me bringing by kids up bilingual was showing off. Sorry love but I like my kids to be able to talk to me AND their dad, I’m funny like that

That's really funny, but sad too, to think that some people think that speaking a second language is showing off.

Please explain how 'stepping up and adapting' (whatever that means) creates money where there is no money, space where there is no space, mental health support for children who are likely quite traumatised after being removed from their original family, time enough for said children to be given the attention they will need...

I’m guessing people have to ‘step up and adapt’ in the same way they can ‘find the money somehow’ in an emergency - another MN Classic.

Or they can ‘move house’. Yeah...to Easy Street. Nothing stopping them.

I've been in the agonising position of deciding whether to take in my sister's children. I love them but I couldn't do it. It would have been damaging to my own children, and would quite likely have ended my marriage, causing further trauma to my own children. And that's before considering that actually I have feelings too. I have been supportive to my sister's children, as have the rest of the family, but we simply did not have the resources, financially, physically, or emotionally, to raise them alongside our own children.

I hate the emotional blackmail that is thrown ari in times of crisis, and I particularly hate the way it is mostly women who are the recipients. If a man said he couldn't raise his brother's children, most people would accept that.

Ooh ‘decent family’ has made me cross. Asinine in the utmost.