Am i an embarrassment

[WellAmThatBad]

So here goes

I have been with DH 12 years. He has a DS . His DS is now 14 and a lovely boy. I have no DC.

I've recently had a birthday which sounds absolutely ridiculous i know but he was the one person who never wished me a happy birthday on FB never tagged me in a picture nothing. I didn't think anything of it to be honest but last week his DS turned 14 who is not on FB yet he put hundreds of pics of him on and wished him happy birthday said how much he loved him how proud he is ect.

Today is our wedding anniversary. Yet again no recognition at all.

We have bit of an age gap (14 years) he's older) when we met i was 9 stone size 8.
12 years later I'm now 12 stone. We get on great most of the time but i really feel a bit hurt and i feel like he's embarrassed of me.

I swear i am not a petty person at all but i feel strangely hurt. Would you?

RI?

It sounds as though he is just taking you for granted @WellAmThatBad. I'm not surprised you are feeling unloved, uncared for and unappreciated by your husband. Thank goodness for your kind hearted DSS. Remember you had something to do with that!

He said he'd buy me new hair straighteners once hairdressers re-opens. I don't even need hair straighteners mine aren't even old he them stormed off slamming doors.
This is such rubbish. Can't talk to you with any insight or maturity and flounces off in a huff like a grumpy teen and leaving you to sleep on the sofa. Not good enough.

And as for offering to buy you hair straighteners- what's that about - especially as he doesn't HAVE to wait for hairdressers to reopen to buy you this "gift".

it came up when we were sat outside after talking i got up and said i needed a wee and walked off he said not surprised with the size of that massive piss tank!!
This is incredibly rude even were it true! It's the sort nasty "laddish banter" between guys after a stag night out - not to his wife.

Do you work outside the home as well as study OP? If so that's great and maybe focus on improving your status there, taking your PhD into account for your further independence.

Don't allow yourself to become subsumed into this relationship to your own disadvantage- certainly at your age. You have your whole life and dreams ahead of you. 🌹

He sounds like a knob
Has he ever bought you a really thoughtful present?
This isn't how a relationship should be in my opinion.

NEVER communicate or comment ,tag Dw on Facebook we live in the same house why communicate by SM.

RI?

Real life.

Post this in relationships OP and don't mention Facebook. You'll get loads of kindness, support and advice.

So... you gave up all your life and degree to prioritise HIM and mother HIS son....(son soubds lovely BTW!)

And he can't even be bothered to spend 5 minutes online to order and wrap some gifts for you...

Seriously?? Fuck that!

You deserve so much more...!

If he normally does get you something and hasn’t this year I would ask what’s different. Is Lockdown bothering him? Has your relationship gone downhill since last year? Did he get you anything for Mother’s Day or was it only your step son’s mum who sent flowers and a card?

You’re quick to blame your weight gain and sound like you lack confidence. The Facebook thing wouldn’t bother me but if he normally buys a card and gift and has stopped for some reason that’s odd.