Stopping drinking for a while

[Patbutcherismyhero]

Throughout lockdown I've gradually started drinking more and more. I now usually only have one day off a week. Last night I drank way too much and was sick, slept terribly and today I just feel awful mentally and physically. I need to cut back. It's become far too much far too often.

I hate waking in the night with anxiety and having to check my phone to if I put any shit on social media. I don't usually get hangovers but I always feel tired and lacking in motivation. Alcohol has become such a big part of my life but I know it's not healthy and I really need to stop for a while. Anyone else?

Dick not sick, although sometimes that too

Thanks for the support yesterday guys, it meant a lot. You're right, I'm not a shit person! None of us are! Nobody's perfect are they, apart from the odd person who wants to come and dump on our otherwise wonderful and supportive thread.

Hello to thread newcomers, the more the merrier and I hope you will find this thread as helpful as I am. It is so good not to feel alone, isn't it?

2 days AF. Kind of happy with my rule of not drinking Sun to Thurs and feel it's achievable. But after last week I just worry about the quantity I can put away in 2 nights. Turning from a habitual drinker into a binge drinker.

I agree that abstinence is probably the way forwards but that just feels … never drinking again? I can't imagine it. But maybe it would quiet the constant inner monologue.

I'm throwing it out there, I know I can never entirely quit. For me I enjoy wine and I enjoy pairing it with food. I'm also an ex publican and that obviously doesn't help 😂
For me it's about not wanting it constantly in the evening.
I want to be someone who posts honestly on the thread when she says 'we don't drink Monday to Thursday' not 'we don't drink Monday to Thursday but we binge Friday to Sunday'

I'm just so booooored with 'negotiating' with myself over how much to drink and how often. I feel like it would be a weight off my mind not to have to think about it.

For those of us trying to decide whether to quit or moderate, I had a thought - if you could press a button which would magically ensure you never drank a drop of alcohol again in your life (no willpower required), would you do it? Would you hesitate?

@lazylinguist

I'm just so booooored with 'negotiating' with myself over how much to drink and how often. I feel like it would be a weight off my mind not to have to think about it.

For those of us trying to decide whether to quit or moderate, I had a thought - if you could press a button which would magically ensure you never drank a drop of alcohol again in your life (no willpower required), would you do it? Would you hesitate?

If it meant I would also be at ideal weight for the rest of my life then absolutely!

Also, maybe we can be sad enough to come up with a list of nice AF drinks? I really struggle but I think it's the habit of having a 'nice' glass of something once the kids are in bed and it's 'adult mode' for evening.
I bought some Fevertree ginger beer and some Diet Coke 🤪

I figure if you would definitely press the button, that means that if you carry on drinking you are genuinely doing it against your will. I don't even have a sense of sadness or reluctance about the idea of never drinking again - it's just hard to resist 'just one' when it's there.

Am thinking maybe something like yoga might help me too; help with self acceptance and can't drink wine whilst doing it!

Yoga is ace. I knit and crochet and that sometimes helps me not want to drink in the evening at home- it keeps my hands and brain busy and anyway, I can't do it without making loads of mistakes if I'm drinking!

I had a drink last night, but it was literally the one which is good. I csnt imagine not drinking again, its such an integral part of me. I feel a lot better moderating as the thought of saying nothing at all, scares me

I think the easiest thing to do is just stop and see how you go. I was a social drinker and an at home drinker. I don’t miss the social ones at all. I am quieter on a night out but is that a bad thing?! It’s been interesting to reflect on.

The evenings ones at home are harder but I’ve stuck it out.

What got me through was not thinking never ever just I’m taking a break and seeing how long I can go. You then start looking at alcohol and it’s grip on you through new eyes. Then becoming AF forever doesn't seem so bad.

Find some nice AF drinks. I like the lagers and also Tesco no alcohol g&t in cans. Also sparkling water with ginger cordial. Do some exercise. Treat yourself to something nice- whatever you fancy.

Find other ways to destress. Yoga, walking, a bath, break the association.

Good luck all! I’ve not cracked it yet but feel freed from thinking about it all the time!

Yoga is definitely ace, as is knitting and crochet to keep the hands busy of an evening! I have tried to knit drunk, it just results in a lot of holes

I must admit I have also got mildly addicted to a stupid game on my phone (two dots) which whilst it's not exactly a healthy pursuit, has managed to get me through that 'it's the end of the working day, let's open a bottle' danger zone a couple of times. I flump on the sofa and work through a few levels as my post-work wind-down rather than pour a drink.

But yeah, yoga. Honestly can't recommend it highly enough. Not only is it really good for you but I do think regular yoga practice, and the way it makes you think about your body, your thought processes and your mental state, has been a big part of how I came to think about giving up the drink. At the risk of sounding like a complete hippy, it really has been a bit life-changing for me.

I used to go to a 90 min yoga class once a week and loved it, can anyone recommend a programme to follow at home on the TV? It's been years since I've done any

I got a bottle of clean gin from Sainsbury's - not cheap at £20 but once I'd given myself a shake and got over the fact that I'd spend it one real gin I love it, it tastes just like a G&T and I like the ritual of making one etc

On that note, though (sorry, I know my posts are always really rambly!) I do think that we shouldn't be too hard on ourselves if cutting down / cutting out just seems to bloody hard right now. Life is in this incredible state of flux and uncertainty for so many of us. The way we live is changing daily. And whilst I don't agree that drinking is a good way to cope with that, I think it's understandable that giving up might seem especially hard at this point in time.

Covid, lockdown, WFH, and yes, yoga have all had an impact recently on how I see my life and lots of my priorities have changed, mainly I think in a positive way. But that might not be the case for everyone and I believe above all else that in this crazy new world we need to cut ourselves some serious slack.

Knitting drunk is rubbish. Yoga drunk would be worse.

Today will be day 4 AF for me (after far too much white wine on Friday) - but that's normal for me. The weekend will be the first test, and then my parents staying for 4 days from Monday will be even harder! Also dh drinks a fair bit and we're both teachers, so about to have 6 weeks of not worrying about getting up for work (less incentive not to drink).

@fluckityfluckfluck - you can stream Yoga with Adriene on youtube to the tv - she's lovely and has a yoga flow for every possible situation! I also use an app called Down Dog, which you have to pay about £35 for a year's subscription but it's brilliant, very adaptable, well worth the investment imo.

Before lockdown I was a member of a studio and went 3-4 times a week; they now do classes on zoom but it's not the same - must admit i am itching to get back there!

I have done yoga after a few, didn't go so well wouldn't do it again! I agree Knife and Box, yoga has been amazing for me, I just need to get on the mat more. I think maybe I might up the amount I practise during the next few weeks to help - pretty sure going AF would cover an extra 1 if not 2 classes anyway! When I look at it like that that's a pretty cool trade off...
Yeah, I need some good AF drinks, fake red is not doing it for me! Fentimans ginger beer isn't too bad and Sainsbury's has some decent alcohol free rose but would welcome other recommendations!

Needausername if you have the name of that Rose I'd be really grateful

Thanks Box I'll check her out. There's a hot yoga studio near me that I've always meant to try, might be good for the dark evenings when winter kicks in - assuming things more normal then

Sure, I can't fully remember but will have a look next time I'm in. I think it has a bird on the bottle! Nosecco isn't too bad either.

I was pregnant for most of last year and believe me, I tried every AF free wine/prosecco going. The only one I didn't mind was Tesco own alcohol free prosecco which is this one

www.tesco.com/groceries/en-GB/products/298040346

Weirdly I still have a bottle. Maybe I'll try it again Friday night.

I bought some Nosecco and a pink af sparkling but haven't tried them yet - regular Rose was my go to though so if there's a nice af version I'd be made up

I've never tried non alcoholic alcohol to be honest. For me it's the feeling I miss rather than the taste. I guess it might be nice to have some sort of fruity mocktail or other nice drink though. Might give it a try. So much inspiration here :)

Alert! My husband has just suggested he makes a curry and brings home a bottle of red. Omg!

Nope, stay strong. You need to get him on side. Alcoholic free beer is delicious with curry!

What a bastard, so glad I'm single