DS coming downstairs on his own?

[chihuahualady]

Not really an aibu but interested in what other parents think.

DS 3 has been coming downstairs on his for the past two weeks and putting the tele on usually helps him self to a piece of fruit as well.He comes down about 6:30 me and OH and DD usually wake up around 8-:8:30.

I'm fine with it but just wondering what other parents do, would you wake up with him and go down? I'm just no good when I'm tired so that extra 2 hours is needed.

It's only because of lockdown really we've not had much routine DD has stopped sleeping and has been staying awake until 1. DS has always been a great sleeper so has been waking up before all of us.

But thanks I've got the message now we will have to do something. Maybe I will just come and sit with him in the sofa from now on.

My 5.5yr old is just allowed to do this now. But maybe 30 mins before either myself or dh is getting up. 2 hours is far too long even at that age.

Just a thought, all those worried about choking, do you only let your children eat in front of you?
My children will sometimes take a bit of fruit to their rooms to eat. I wouldn't hear them choking in that situation.

About the getting up early, my children have always got up around 6am, with my first I would get up too but fall asleep on the sofa, now I stay in bed till my alarm goes off. They don't usually help themselves to food, occasionally my eldest will make them both cereal.

Trade off getting up with your husband. You get up tomorrow with your son, the next day your husband does it.

My 7 year old has been doing this for around 6 months but is not allowed to eat without us. And yes to pp who asked, my children (age 3 and 7) only eat under supervision.

I’m pretty relaxed about things but I definitely wouldn’t do this. The fear of choking would be too much for me. My young DC also wake up early but I then get up myself as well or they come up for a snuggle in my bed to give me a few extra minutes before I give up and go sort breakfast. Could you get up when he does but then just take to the sofa so your still in the same room as him?

@coulddowithanap yes only eating in front of me. Very rarely let him eat without him sitting down also. Not sure what age I would feel comfortable him eating out of sight!

no after I've woken up

Well then, if you are asleep, the camera isn't going to help you spot if he is chocking or climbing on something.

Just get up with him and have a rest on the sofa! You can still keep a proper eye that way, while still not getting up properly! I've been up from 5am the last 4 years with mine, it just a sacrifice I've had to make as a parent. It's just too risky to allow to continue

My 3yo choked on a baked bean when I was sitting opposite him at the table. It was one of the most frightening things I've ever seen and though I reacted immediately, it took five or six goes for me to clear his windpipe. He can't eat in a room alone.

If you have a laptop, you could take it to bed with you and when he wakes up, let him climb in with you and watch stuff on the laptop while you doze. By all means give him a carton of juice or whatever but don't let him eat unsupervised.

I almost had a heart attack reading this post and it's not even my child. I think you need to resolve your sleep issue or just get on with it. I think most parents have operated on sleep deprivation before. I'm not saying that's good, but it's necessary.

My children will sometimes take a bit of fruit to their rooms to eat.

We dont eat in our bedrooms.

Definitely no way.Anything can happen to a small child in a few seconds, never mind a few minutes , I would never allow a small child to switch on any TV or electrical item either. You need to be totally aware at all times , what a small child can get up to when alone.

I used to climb over the bars attached to my bed, go downstairs and phone 999 to chat with the police for hours at 4am every day when I was about 3. Sometimes the speaking clock too. Eventually, the police came by and told my parents what was going on and asked if they could move the phone. My parents had no idea what I got up to as I was so quiet. I have a lovely photo of me meeting them dressed in a little police uniform.

I think it’s fine for him to explore, but try and baby proof things downstairs to prevent choking hazards/police type incidents. Ultimately, he could also choke playing in his room so if you take similar precautions - not a problem.

We're pretty relaxed parents but have only recently let DD downstairs by herself in the morning. She's just turned 6.

Just a thought, all those worried about choking, do you only let your children eat in front of you?
My children will sometimes take a bit of fruit to their rooms to eat. I wouldn't hear them choking in that situation.

I think it depends on age. I wouldn’t be comfortable with a child younger than 5 or 6 eating alone tbh. Definitely not 3. If an older child started choking they would hopefully still be be able to leave their room to find you and seek help. A three year old 100% won’t.

Sorry but wtf?
I would love to sleep in till 8:30 but I'm a parent so I get up when my child gets up

I’m really surprised he’d want to be alone on his own downstairs for two hours?! My DS is 5 and I’ve left him in the living to get a shower etc from when he was probably age 3, but he would always end up after about 5/10 minutes coming upstairs to see me.

Or he would chose to watch my iPad on my bed whilst I got a shower.

Now he’s content with spending time on his own playing in his room etc, however first thing in the morning he wants cuddles etc.

Couldn’t you encourage him to come into your room and your bed to watch tv so he is safe>

@Unknown2020 he doesn't even wake us anymore just gets his juice and tablet and sits on the sofa until 8ish then will come up and ask us for breakfast.

I'm pretty relaxed but this feels too much for me. However, at this age I think I would allow a sensible three year old to stay in his room watching tv on an iPad or something. is that a possible as a compromise?

DD has been waking up and watching her iPad in her room off and on for a while. She's 5 now. It doesn't happen all the time because we all usually naturally wake up about the same time, but it's not unusual for once or twice a week for her to do this. Admittedly, there was the time we realised she'd been up since about 4 am.....

Put the house alarm on downstairs to alert you when he is up?

Just a thought, all those worried about choking, do you only let your children eat in front of you?

Yeah pretty much. They sit at the table to eat 99% of the time, including snacks.

You and OH can take turns to go to bed early and get up, the other stays up with DD.

Are you going out much and getting lots of exercise?

I know it's brutal, we have early wakers. But it's not forever. We do let them go downstairs together sometimes but they're 7 and 4.

I was like "omg no way, far too young!"

Then realised my 3 year old is currently downstairs watching Peppa with a snack and drink whilst I do some jobs upstairs.

I forget she's only 3, she's more of an adult than I am sometimes. I think it depends on the kid, you know what your kid is capable of. Just make sure they know boundaries

My 8 year old does this and I still always have an ear out. I can never fully relax and end up getting up eventually too. He's 8! 3 is still very very tiny to be left alone for that length of time.

My 3 year old is sometimes downstairs on his own in the morning

DH will go downstairs with him first thing and sort his breakfast and then go to work whilst I’m in bed feeding newborn which unfortunately is sometimes more time consuming than others.

He can’t reach the door lock, can’t get to anything else that’s dangerous and sits there watching tv for a bit leaving me in peace

Sometimes he comes upstairs and joins me in bed but most of the time he would rather be snuggling on the sofa with the tv that time of the morning