You're white. You haven't experienced racism

[PatricksRum]

I'm so sick of repeating myself today.
AIBU or is ignorance just bliss?

@Handsoffisback I feel so sorry for your friend, I hope the school can sort it (I doubt it) or they can move away.

The worst thing is is that I'm not white (I do look white), my Dad is half Nigerian and my Mum is white, my ex husband is white and very fair skinned so my kids are the same. When my daughter was being teased for her hair she tried to tell them that her grandad has hair a bit like them but they laughed at her 🤷‍♀️

I would love to move but it's so expensive and I have a job that I love, it will happen though. My ex husband lives in Kent so it would be a massive change for the kids but I do believe they would be safer.

I agree Op but your anger and rudeness isn’t doing you favours on this thread.

Im sorry but in the UK i don't think the UK "built a society based on the systemic enslavement of non white people".

Obviously it's not the whole of British history - but it's the bit of British history that led to the empire, and the empire still underpins many British people's sense of self - just look at our Current PM.

OP I found your post very triggering. I am Greek and therefore classed as white, but because of my dark features I have been called a Paki. I also have a very strong accent that people often misplace and have been called all sorts. I live in Yorkshire, a very insular society that is not very accepting of foreigners. Local youth has tried to set my house on fire, broke windows by throwing rocks, throw litter in our garden, mud on our windows...in my 21 years here in the UK I have never felt accepted and wanted. I have often been told to go back home, even though my kids were born and raised here and the UK is home. Racism has many ugly heads and it impacts on us all.

@CandyLeBonBon thank you. Weirdly it's something I never discuss. But I'm hoping it will help some people to realise where the frustration is coming from over the understanding of racism.

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland one account signposted towards Laylafsaad and I am learning (and unlearning) a lot from her.

Just seen the pictures of the 4 policemen charged for George's murder. One looks mixed race and one is Chinese.

But the Japanese didn't build an entire society based on the systemic subjugation and enslavement of white people.

Tbf here though many white societies/countries didn't build on enslavement of black people either. Not every white country was involved in colonialism and slavery. Some of them were busy being opressed by bigger countries who actively tried to even get rid of the language etc to erase the group's heritage at one point or another.

@Immigrantsong that means that you're white on paper, but you are experiencing things a lot more like a BAME person because you have darker skin. The fact that you feel so angry at this post is exactly the point. The ONLY reason you've experienced those things is because you have darker skin. That is all it takes. Nobody checks your ID before attacking someone based on the colour of their skin.

I don't agree with you OP. My dad is white and when he got a job in a predominately black country his picture was plastered all over the local news about how white people had come to take their jobs. He was then beaten up in a local cafe because of that broadcast.

My dad was actually there to pass over his skills and train the locals so that he could leave.

Whenever he reentered the country due to his U.K. passport he was regularly held in a room at the airport and at one point put into the jail cell as they 'couldn't decide what to do with him'.

He was one of two white people requested by the country to train their locals so that they didn't need to rely on a 'foreign' work force.

Also there are and have been in the past, white slaves. It's daft to believe no white person has ever suffered based solely on the colour of their skin. There are lots of white minorities as well that suffer to this day.
Whilst I sympathise that you too suffer racism I do not believe that your cause is more worthy than people of any colours suffering. Some countries with predominantly darker skin also are prejudice against people of their own race who have the darkest skin.
Everyone just needs to get together and combat this. Unfortunately it will never happen because of the way some people are raised.

The soldiers tortured in Japanese prison camps would beg to differ on that point.

But that's not the same thing. I have said nothing about the experiences of POW who were used to build the Burma Railway (for example), because a war atrocity - whilst being completely repugnant - is not the same as an entire race of people being exploited over centuries to build a society.

This isn't top trumps.

The overwhelming majority of violent acts against black people worldwide are committed by other black people.

But @orangeheater although his treatment was appalling, he could escape. Back to a society where being a white man was the norm. A POC can't do that. Do you see the difference?

Not every white country was involved in colonialism and slavery.

I didn't suggest that they all were.

Ok, some weapons grade whataboutery incoming. Skip entirely, I don't mind. It contains horrible descriptions of violence.

The Times newspaper reported yesterday that a care worker and her 18 year old daughter were stabbed to death in their home in Salisbury. Neighbours heard the screams, and heard the 18 year old girl crying 'I don't want to die'. With depressing predictability the article concluded 'the police have reassured the community that this is a contained incident. A man in his 30s is in custody'.

This was on page 16 of the paper. To steal yet another phrase from social media, 'let that sink in'.

I'm sure the story is receiving more coverage locally but this is where we are. Double homicide in the most brutal way imaginable and it's the wallpaper of British life.

I'm tired, I'm angry. I have no more idea now how to solve the problem of male violence than I did as a child in the eighties when a girl was taken from the beach near my house.

But I do know that telling men to crack on and fix it because its the fault of each and every one of them will not work. It never has. The numbers remain. We need to do what we can, as the mother of a boy I feel it keenly that I have a duty here.

But I won't make him treat others with empathy and respect by telling him he's the problem. I want him to be a good boy, and grow into a good man. To treat everyone as he would like to be treated himself, and to oppose unfairness or cruelty where he sees it, like my dad does, and my partner too.

I fully support BLM, their movement is not about me or my feelings. But I think the accusatory and 'woke American' tone of much of what I've seen in recent days serves no positive purpose other than to release understandable anger.

If I'm honest I find the term 'emotional labour' wearisome in itself. There are no obvious or easy answers. If we knew how to stop police brutality or male violence or systemic racism we'd be busy doing it. We don't hold the magic key, this issue will take generations of collaborative effort to change. It won't start at all with a fight against the people most willing to serve.

Gnarly I have reported your racial slur.

[quote AMemeByAnyOtherName]@Immigrantsong that means that you're white on paper, but you are experiencing things a lot more like a BAME person because you have darker skin. The fact that you feel so angry at this post is exactly the point. The ONLY reason you've experienced those things is because you have darker skin. That is all it takes. Nobody checks your ID before attacking someone based on the colour of their skin. [/quote]
I have dark features, but my skin is very pale. People though hear the accent and they project their own prejudices. I am not angry with the post like you like to suggest, I said triggered. The OP has been throughout rude and aggressive and the denial to acknowledge other people's suffering is not something I have encountered from anyone that has experienced suffering. You are right on the no one checking your ID before attacking you, which proves that racism affects us all regardless.

@GnarlyOldThing what the hell? Maybe you're being targeted because of how vile you are, I can't even believe I just read that.

I ve been convinced recently that you can’t have “inverse” racism (I.e. black against white), and that the term means discrimination/ oppression by the privileged group against the less privileged. So I agree with you.

Gnarly please get your post removed. That's a disgusting racial slur

@CandyLeBonBon that's also a daft excuse to pretend it's not a white man suffering racism. Just because he could go back to the U.K. doesn't mean his experience was not racism

Even according to the dictionary definition of "racism" that gets posted all the time, I'll argue that black people (I am black so I can't speak for any other ethnic minorities) can't be racist to white people.

This is because any prejudice towards white people stems from internalised racism in my experience. My grandparents were quite prejudiced towards white people but this was because they viewed themselves as inferior; their prejudice was a reaction to racism they had experienced all their lives.