To ask how long it took you to conceive?

[SummerMeadows20]

Now I know the answers here are going to vary massively but if you didn’t have fertility issues, how long did it take you to conceive your first child?

I’m 33, DH says we should ‘get on with it soon’ as neither of us are getting any younger. Whilst I know that’s true, I still don’t feel ready. I still feel like I’d resent being pregnant and having a child, especially at the moment with all the Corona stuff going on.

But then I keep thinking, what if one, or both of us has fertility issues that we don’t know about and we end up having to try for years?!

Is there an average amount of time to conceive before it’s classed as a ‘problem?’

Are most people months or years?! The few friends of mine that have children didn’t seem to take long at all but I’m pretty sure that can’t be the norm?!

First time a month, then miscarried, second time a month, then miscarried, then took us almost 4 years and I was younger than you so my advice would be not to wait too long before you make a decision on whether you want kids.

2 months.Age 33

I am 27 and took us 17 months

First month age 31 which was a massive shock. I had been told it would take a long time due to endometriosis so was trying before we were ready really.

I wouldn’t start trying unless you are ready to be pregnant. It could happen quickly. Yet again it could take a while or you may uncover problems. Unless you’ve had other tests etc it’s a leap into the unknown.

DH and I married when I was 33 and him 32. We decided to have a fun year when we went on lots of trips and started ttc a year later with a hope that it would happen before I turned 35.

First time it took 4 months and I gave birth at 35. Second time I conceived on the second month of trying and gave birth at 37. 2.5 years between my children.

I too felt unready in many ways. Ideally there would have been a pause button we could have pressed enjoying lots of child free relaxing years before taking the plunge. But my age was what it was and we were definitely ready in lots of other ways - jobs, money, housing, having had very adventurous 20s etc. Now that I’m staring 40 in the face I’m glad I didn’t wait longer. Despite the unknown of whether conceiving would have been more difficult, I’m glad that the truly tiring times are behind us and looking forward to getting my energy, fitness and career focus back in my 40s as the kids grow older and more independent. We are certainly “done” at 2 kids. The thought of more is just too much for us and we of course feel incredibly fortunate to have our two.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do. It’s a huge decision but your gut will guide you. Not something to be entered into lightly yet on the other hand I don’t think there anyone feels absolutely ready for it either.

It took us around 19 months.

Baby 1 - 1 month
Baby 2 - 18 months

Totally different ends of the spectrum for us. We got pg on the pill (properly and consistently used) the first time, second time took 15 months of TTC.

I think like a PP has said, you really won't know until you start to try, and even then it might not be the same time frame with each pregnancy

First month I came off the pill, second 3 months, third was a surprise.

We’ve been very lucky as fallen pregnant usually the month we have said we will start trying.

Am currently pregnant with DD3 and we weren’t trying for her as such but it was a “if it happens it happens” scenario and we are very lucky she did.

Conceived on second “go” each time, despite having erratic period & really long cycles. Using opks helped second time round. First time, just got lucky. On both occasions purposefully put it out of my head that I was ttc (still enjoying wine for example) I did cut down on exercise which helped restore periods, I think

I came off the pill but it took me 3 years. I had no BFP during that time either. I gave birth at 33. Had I known it was going to take me so long I would have tried earlier, as I would have loved one at 30 and one at 34 but realistically I won't be having one at 38 as I don't feel I will have the energy to run after two by then!

Just to add I had been on the pill for 15 years and I think that had an impact on my ability to conceive.

13 months at age 28

6 years here. Unexplained infertility. Failed IVF x 2, now pregnant naturally. All being well, will be 37 when this baby arrives.

2nd month first baby, 5th month second baby

Took us 3 months after I came off the pill.

Apparently that is about average.

uk.clearblue.com/how-to-get-pregnant/how-long-does-it-take

A couple of months for 1st, same for second (mc at 6 weeks), then pregnant again 2 weeks after that.

Thanks for the replies.

We haven’t been on any hormonal contraception now for 4 years as I just can’t hack it. So it’s just been conforms for us so I’m hoping that may help a bit?

I have regular periods, however occasionally 2 in a month (though thankfully that hasn’t happened for about 7 months now) I’ve had bad abdominal pain on and off for years now and have had so many ultrasounds and scans and all they ever say is there’s nothing there and all looks perfectly healthy! Again, this has died down I’d say in the last 6 months, it feels a bit like a dull period pain and will just come on randomly throughout the month.

I have had Chlamydia before too when I was 21 and at uni. I did have symptoms though and was treated, but I don’t think it was treated for about 6 months as I kept thinking I had thrush or BV for a while so I guess that could’ve done some damage, though nothing has ever been said at any of my ultrasounds/ scans etc.

To be honest, and I know this is going to sound like a weird thing to say, but we always kind of agreed that by the end of this year we’d start trying. I was kind of at peace with starting TTC come the autumn as I thought yeh, great I can have one last fun filled summer, lots of nights out with friends, gigs, concerts, a couple of holidays etc and then hopefully by the autumn I’ll feel happy that I made the most of 2020 before TTC.

Then Corona hit. I just feel like I’ve been cooped up in this house, not seeing friends or doing anything fun now for months and the thought of extending that for now another year, and missing out on all those fist nights out, holidays etc when we’re all able makes me feel cheated I know, I know, there are people dying etc. I know how pathetic and immature the above sounds but I guess that explains, somewhat, why I still don’t feel ready.

Condoms*

Came off the pill Nov 2018, fell pregnant in March 2019, gave birth in December 2019.

@summermeadows20 could you not start trying now? We always wanted another baby but we're thinking of waiting another year or 2, now I'm pregnant in lockdown we've kind of joked it's ideal as it hasn't stopped any of our plans for the year!

Three years and an IVF cycle. We were very lucky that it worked first time.
You could consider paying privately for basic fertility tests to see if you can risk waiting a bit longer. If e.g. your partner has no sperm then clearly you need to start making decisions now

16 months. I'd given up hope and decided to focus on work. Got myself a new job shortly before discovering I was up the duff. Currently six months into my maternity leave.