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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Neighbour has painted our and I mean our fence

303 replies

Endoftether2000 · 31/05/2020 19:04

Would I be unreasonable to go out and paint my fence. Scenario approx a year ago husband decided to replace all fences on both sides the original posts were wooden and had broken causing our garden to have props holding the right fence up. He went round to the neighbour who was relatively new and advised that he was replacing the fence with concrete gravel boards and posts. She advised that her side of the fence was OK to which my husband responded that if he removed the props that were straddling our garden the fence would fall down and was surprised she didn't know as the old neighbour was aware and advised my husband he would make the new buyer aware (as if he was going to stay he would have gone half's with us) so he agreed times and dates when the fence would be removed to no inconvenience to her or her garden. Fence was removed she then asked if she could have the fence for her wood burner so husband and people that were helping took the old fence round. She then knocked at our door and said that she had too much wood now and could he dispose of the excess which he did. She then paints said fence (we stained our side grey) she painted hers with dark brown stain which has ingressed but not too badly but painted the top of the fence brown when I had stained it grey which can only be seen from the bedroom so I could live with that. Then she hammers things to it only one screw yes screw not nail can be seen so can live with that. We are on the front garden today and notice behind the overgrown bushes which is our next project to tackle she has dark brown stained the section of wood that is the size of a tall gate that connects from our house to her garage and the small fence that is our border in dark brown stain on both sides the small fence being on our land. The section of wood and the fence are on our land so is this trespassing? I am tempted to go out and paint over it even if due to the colour I would have to use garden paint? Opinions appreciated. By the way I hate dark brown stain! Smile

OP posts:
Viviennemary · 31/05/2020 20:28

Then it's a cheek. She had no right. But it's still hard to picture. Who sees this fence that she painted. You or your neighbour.

Endoftether2000 · 31/05/2020 20:29

Thank you RHRA you have it exactly correct I just didn't get my story over very well 👍😆

OP posts:
Herja · 31/05/2020 20:29

Excellent! I actually worked it out straight away, but then thought I might have been confused as every one was having problems.

Your neighbour sounds wierd OP. I would definitely repaint any fencing you want to and probably enquire why on earth she painted it in the first place.

SoPram · 31/05/2020 20:30

Poor form from neighbours

OmgThereAreNoPlanesAboveMeNow · 31/05/2020 20:33

@OtterBe4 hopefully it would be applied evenly😂

Woods52 · 31/05/2020 20:34

I think this is more about lockdown stress than fence painting. Our neighbours painted their side in a weird shade of lavender without asking (deliberately sloppily after we had a recent barney, I reckon) so a lot of it leaked/splashed on our side. I was livid/bordering on murderous for days (like waking up in the night, looking out the window and RAGING) til I REALLY thought about it and realised: I’m completely over reacting in a way I wouldn’t if I hadn’t been stuck at home for 10 weeks going fucking crazy with stress.
Look, it’s just fence.
It’s just paint.
Be happy you have a neighbour who cares about their space as much as you do. (And might be just trying to cope like the rest of us by brightening up her garden).
Just grow some plants on the bits you can see/don’t like.
It’s not worth the stress or upset to make it a bigger issue. You’ll end up hating where you live.
Do yourself a favour, look the other way and forget about it.
I did.

Endoftether2000 · 31/05/2020 20:35

VivienneMary the four metre fence she will see and she is the first house on the estate I am not so concerned about her side she can do what she likes it is the fact that she has painted my side and my 10ft panel in dark brown stain which I neither asked for or want as looking at our house from the front it will look odd as the whole of the right side new fence we painted it grey stain and left the neighbour to paint his side what ever colour he wanted. My husband thought he was doing both sides a favour by replacing the fences at our costs as they are relatively new houses on a nice small estate but as all the posts were wooden they had rotten and snapped

OP posts:
NameChange657 · 31/05/2020 20:37

My head hurts after trying to understand this thread.

Woods52 · 31/05/2020 20:40

Ps: I just quietly cleaned up/stained over the mess they left on our side when they were out.
And felt proud I hadn’t hose-piped their washing/thrown cat shit over like I originally wanted to (thanks to corona-rage plus PMT)

Yoyoallovertheshow · 31/05/2020 20:40

Jeez @Windyatthebeach i'm so sorry you're so petty, it must be exhausting!

Endoftether2000 · 31/05/2020 20:41

I would agree with you Woods 52 but she does not work retired but late 50's early 60's and we have worked all through lockdown I may just leave my overgrown bushes to hide it but neaten them up

OP posts:
SingaporeSlinky · 31/05/2020 20:42

How long ago did this happen? Can’t you just knock on her door and ask if she painted your panel, and ask why? Tell her you were going to paint it grey to match the rest of your garden, and just see what she says. Could she be under the impression it’s hers as it’s next to her garage?

TheFencePainter · 31/05/2020 20:42

There is just so much in that can! Can't get it go to waste!Blush

Must. Pain. Everything.

FOJN · 31/05/2020 20:45

I'm following OP and your neighbour is a CF. I think I would act innocent and ask her if she realised the bit of fence she painted on both sides was on your land. Of course she knew but giving her an out will avoid a war. Then tell her you will be painting over it when you get round to sorting that part of the garden.
The part about the wood sounds like your kindness resulted in an inconvenience to you, I wouldn't volunteer to do a favour for her again. She sounds like a piss taking PITA.

mumsiedarlingrevolta · 31/05/2020 20:45

Honestly the only diagram ever that made a very hard to understand post even harder.

Endoftether2000 · 31/05/2020 20:47

Herja thank you for this I started to think I was unreasonable my husband and I haven't been on lockdown so not lock down crazy just disappointed that someone would do this and someone we don't even know that well 👍😆

OP posts:
LadyFeliciaMontague · 31/05/2020 20:47

She legally had to allow us onto her property to maintain the fence. I went round and painted it grey.

Jesus wept.

Doggodogington · 31/05/2020 20:50

Op yanbu, no way should she have painted your side of the fence.
windy I have no words for that level of twattishness.

Soontobe60 · 31/05/2020 20:55

@Windyatthebeach

We were in the same position op. Our fence. We painted our side grey. Ndn painted her side brown. We had a solicitor instruct her not to touch our property.. She legally had to allow us onto her property to maintain the fence. I went round and painted it grey.
That sounds really mean! Why did you paint their side grey? Was it because you could, just to get your own back for them painting it brown in the first place?
Neverendingweeds · 31/05/2020 20:56

Just paint over your side in grey and don't say anything to her. I can't really work out why she painted your side other than she thinks it's hers (but then why would you paint both sides).

As for the person on here who forced the neighbours to have the colour fence of their choosing on both sides, what the actual fuck? I was quietly seething the other day as our neighbours painted their side of our fence a horrible yellowy brown and some has seeped through the cracks and is visible from our side - annoying yes but I will just re paint ours like a normal person Wink

glitterbiscuits · 31/05/2020 21:07

No one wants to look at a grey fence. Vile.
She's done you a favour

Beautiful3 · 31/05/2020 21:08

I would just knock on the door and ask nicely if she had painted it. When she says," yes" ask, "why? Because it belongs to me, and I wanted to paint it grey." Then tell her to please not paint your side again. That should resolve it.

BrutusMcDogface · 31/05/2020 21:08

Windy- I know everyone has already said it, but wow you’re mean! And petty!

The fence we own was replaced by our neighbour as they wanted a posh fence; we gave them the equivalent of what it would have cost to replace the cheap panels. Therefore I’m not really sure whose it is, now!

The other fences that belong to two other neighbours are in various states of repair; two are new and the neighbours have painted them. One panel has loads of dark grey streaks down it where the paint has run. One panel is broken on our side but not ours to replace. In short, our fence is a mess, and dp won’t entertain the idea of painting it on our side.

Though, is it actually illegal to paint someone’s fence on your own side? 🤔

CrystalTipped · 31/05/2020 21:09

I'm not overly fussy, but if my neighbour painted my fence grey I'd be furious. Grey wood... When will this dull prison grey trend finally die?

Come back magnolia, all is forgiven! Grin

Gallacia · 31/05/2020 21:10

This is abit OTT

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