I’m really disgusted with myself

[Anon20201]

I tried to start a diet today but been stuffing my face. I just feel like such a loser. I can’t even stick to a diet for one day what is wrong with me? I really hate myself

I don’t want to deny my kids treats so I go have cupcake mix n other stuff at home but I end up eating it with them

Firstly slim fast is shit. Don’t bother.
Diets are shit. Don’t bother.
Eat normally, don’t deny yourself anything BUT eat smaller portions so you eat within a calorie target. If you want to eat a cupcake that’s fine, just eat the rest of the day within your calorie target.
2000 cals is too much for the average woman Btw. Take 20% off your tdee to find your weight loss calorie target.

tdeecalculator.net

It’s fine to eat a, normal sized, home made curry and rice. If you add in a 385 calorie naan bread then you will be eating too much. Add a beer or dessert and you are putting on a lot of weight.
It is possible to eat normally and lose weight.
Start adding everything you eat onto My Fitness Pal.

That sandwich you ‘thought’ was healthy could actually have more calories in than a roast dinner.
A magnum ice lolly has more calories than a low calorie lunch.
Apple crumble and custard can have more calories than breakfast and lunch combined.

Weight loss is calories in V calories out. You don’t have to exercise to burn calories but if you blindly eat with no thoughts to how the calories add up each day then you will put on weight.
It’s been an eye opener to me to realise that, when logging my food, a ‘healthy’ smoothie had more calories in than a small Cadbury’s bar of chocolate!
Don’t diet, change portion sizes and make better choices. You can do it!

My weight is up and down atm but what worked for me, and got me from the overweight category to healthy was changing habits.

Little things like:

Making salad for work lunch, and taking a banana and no money so I’m not tempted to buy anything else.

In the evening I was in the habit of snacking, so I tried sitting on a different sofa cushion (sounds crazy but it helped!). Sometimes I would brush my teeth earlier in the evening so I wouldn’t snack after.

Plan evening meals ahead of time so that you dont have the panic of what to cook and end up sticking in something quick and unhealthy.

Cutting down rather than cutting out.

That’s normal. Try to be kind to yourself. Your brain is designed to find food rewarding. Tomorrow is another day. Try to avoid all or nothing and catastrophic thinking (I’ve blown it now so...) and set yourself SMART goals. Small, measureable, achievable, realist and timed. For example rather than telling yourself the diet starts again tomorrow, decide to swap one treat for something healthy, or one meal for something less calorific. Just one small change and allow yourself to feel good about it.
Focus on why you want to eat more healthy/balanced food rather than why you should avoid this or that. How will it change how you feel. Focus on health and vitality rather than weight and size.

Just some ideas to take or leave. But definitely follow the ‘be kind to you self’ advice!

100 calories of broccoli has a very different effect on the body compared to 100g of chocolate, wine or pizza

In terms of weight loss - NO
In terms of nutritional benefit - yes

And yes in terms of fullness and satiety, but sometimes only a pizza will do.

100 calories is 100 calories, regardless of if that 100 calories is made up of carrots or cream cakes. If you stick to calories you will lose weight. You will feel crap if those calories are junk though.

The first day is always the worst day of your diet. Started our diet (again!) monday. I had a 1000kcal pudding! Just do better tomorrow. I'm dieting and have lots of experience dieting because I'm a yoyoer so if ever need support or someone to tell you to put the doughnut down then feel free to send a message
Just eat loads and loads of veg, filling up on veg is the key to diets for me. And sugar fee icelollies!

@LadyFeliciaMontague not true, sugar content is massively important, a quick release of sugar will encourage your body to store fat. A slow release of mixed calories will not.

The content of the calories are definitely important. 100 kcal of refined carbohydrates affects your body differently to 100 kcal of high quality fat or protein.

I watched a documentary recently about a man who was normally a low carber, but for a month he ate and drank supposedly healthy foods with 'hidden sugars', so smoothies, low fat yoghurt, cereal bars, granola etc.

At the end experts compared the before and after diets in great detail, daily calories, food logs, muscle and body fat percentages etc. And even through his calorie intake was lower on the hidden sugar diet than his normal low carb diet, he gained about 10kg.

It was a real eye opener for me, and made me realise that 'calories in vs calories out' wasn't necessarily true.

I'll see if I can find it to link to.

Try to get rid of all the snacks and unhealthy food in your house. If it's not there you won't pick at it. I would not try to diet if you find it difficult but instead sensibly reduce your calorie intake by perhaps cutting down on say sugar in your beverages, not drinking fizzy drinks, avoiding choc/sweets.
Try and come up with a healthier meal plan that is manageable and incorporate it with additional exercise, walking, cycling- whatever is most enjoyable.
The pounds won't fly off but with minor and achievable changes to your diet and exercise level you'll slowly but sustainably loose weight which should remain manageable to maintain.
Good luck.

Thank you everyone. New day tomorrow. I e just got “rid” (eaten myself and got husband and kids to finish off) all the bad foods in the house. We only have healthy snacks like fruit now in the house, no cake mixes n crisps etc.

Thank you all for your support. I will do better tomorrow I know I will.

Good luck for tomorrow OP, I hope you have a good day. Try and keep busy.

@seriousandloyal - thank you! Yes good point I will try to keep busy

In terms of weight loss - NO

Yes, when it comes to humans as opposed to Bunsen Burners. Also, it depends when you eat that 100g (which astounds me!).

OP if you find yourself bingeing, you may have an eating disorder. There is lots of help available for this in the form of cognitive behavioural therapy courses and self-help books. Go onto Amazon and search for a CBT self help workbook for binge eating.

I was an anorexic/bulimic/binge-eater until my late twenties. Please know that starving and restrictive diets don't work, and restricting calories severely will harm your metabolism so you gain weight again.

Here is what I'd recommend.

1. buy a CBT self-help book so you understand emotional eating.
2. ALWAYS eat breakfast. Even if you trip up and have a late night binge. You will be less likely to binge at night if you know that it's against the rules to skip breakfast.
3. Eat what you want during the day, when you want. Listen to your body and see what it wants. You'll be surprised to discover that it does in fact often crave healthy foods. It's your emotions and guilt that make you want stuff your face with junk. It's not actually what your body wants or needs.
4. Eat a large evening meal at 5pm and then no carbs whatsoever beyond that. You can snack on things like olives or smoked salmon, which are rich and satisfying but don't get your insulin going.
5. try and get something fermented like kimchi into your diet. Binge eating and junk can be pretty bad for your stomach bacteria, which in turn can increase your predisposition to obesity.

Don't do extreme diets. Don't fast early in the day. Don't omit entire food groups or believe that one bar of chocolate is a sin. You are not disgusting, or a freak or a weirdo for binge-eating junk food, it is extremely common behaviour and relatively straightforward to fix.

Good luck x

Good luck today OP, be kind to yourself. I'm on a weight loss mission too, I started yesterday and I'm really hoping and pushing myself to stick to it. I loathe the way I look at the moment, Zoom calls are mortifying and instead of enjoying the calls with my family I'm cringing throughout about the way I look.
I'm also getting lots of aches and pains and I'm sure this is down to being 5' 2" and weighing 14st 4lbs.
I've meal planned for the week and bought snacks for the kids that I don't like so they're not deprived but I'm not tempted.
I'm not following a set diet just cutting out the crap, upping fruit and veg and smaller portions of everything else.
Let us know how you get on today.

@msflibble yes I agree I think it is emotional eating. I have in the past had counselling but not for this. Thank you for the suggestions.

@catchingzzzeds thank you for your words of encouragement. Goodluck to you too and hope you well with your healthy eating

@BumpBundle

I completely agree with you re point 2 of your post.

If I have breakfast, that’s it I’m done for. My stomach growls all day wanting food and I’m in the biscuit tub again by 9am.

If I avoid breakfast I can make it through to lunch/12pm before I’m really hungry I just keep drinking and drinking.

I think it's a lot about what you have for that breakfast.
If I have portion of cornflakes with milk, I will be hungry well before lunch.
But 3eggs, red pepper, cheese omelette, for example, or tost and 2 eggs will easily take me through till lunch without feeling like I want to eat the world. Both are between 230 and 250 cal and satisfying

I think ultimately, when you’ve struggled with weight issues or yo-yo dieted, each time you start, it becomes a “this is never going to work so I may as well just...” scenario.

I’m 58. I have lost and gained the same stone in weight ALL MY LIFE. It’s should destroying. Of course now, with menopause it’s even harder.
I’ve recently joined Slimming World (3 weeks ago) and frankly, I’d kill for something full of flavour. It’s healthy eating but already, I’m sick of the sign of pasta and bland sauces. Will I stick to it? Well for now, yes as I’ve lost 10 lbs. However, will I eat like this FOREVER? No. And that’s where diets fail for many many people.

OP, I feel your distress. You need to try hard to work out why you overeat. Is it a “I’m about to go into a self induced (dietary) famine/diet so I’ll eat as much as I can”? Is it pure comfort/reward eating? Only you know.

What about MyFitnessPlan? Easy to use and you can alter your calorie input to suit you. By that, I mean if it says eat 1200 cals but you might usually consume 3000 cals, then a setting of 1800 would mean weight loss for you.

Walking (any exercise is good) is my saviour. I put my headphones on and have brisk walking music (my choice...all uplifting stuff) and off I go. Thirty mins a day (15 there/15back) might help. Of course, it depends what your exercise levels are already.

Please stop beating yourself up. I have a friend who, all our lives, I thought was naturally slim. She I stayed with her for a week, I realised she is ravenous all the time but just denies herself the basics. “Oh, I’d love some warm crusty bread with jam and butter” she said one morning, as I had breakfast. She had black coffee and an apple. Now, whilst I’d love to look like her, I know I couldn’t stick to what she eats. She had a salad at John Lewis whilst I had a stir fry and even the , no mayo or dressing just a basic salad and pushed most of it around her plate.

Choices choices...

I hate autocorrect... 😡. Sorry... hope you get the gist.

Breakfast makes me want to eat all day too.

Slimming World are good, I should add. It works for many many people. I started at 12st 3lbs and weighed in today at 11st 6 so, yes it works. Maybe for you, OP, a group setting would help. Don’t mean to diss SW 😊

I think people should just stop using the word "dieting". It is a word which is now very much connected with negatives. Plus anyways, you don't want to diet. You want to change your eating habits for good so you don't end up yoyoing. Diets are temporary. There is always that niggle about what will happen after.

So don't say "I am dieting"
Say "I am changing for a better lifestyle".

Don't go into it with "I am going to eat lettuce till I am x weight". Or in your case drink that god forsaken milkshakes. Learn about food. It's actually quite cool to learn differences between foods, what's what, what has what, try new things, new flavours, create new recipes. It's actually lots of fun! I LOVE food now. I have a bunch of new spices, I am experimenting. It's been great! And because I enjoy it, I have a good chance of sticking to it. It's normal/ish food. My DH eats it too, but it's higher in protein and I just have bit smaller portion (unless I am starving, then I throw in courgette to bulk it up). Plus I found short workouts which give me no excuse. I do have 15 min... Weight in today and 1 stone 4 pounds down in last 6 weeks! Starting week 7 now (I had confusion about dates with it at one point) I am not 23+ stone anymore! I am sure you would enjoy it too. Only a masochist can stick to slimfast imo.

Ditch the diets. Change lifestyle. Love good, as in good for your body and mind, food but in smaller amounts.

And massive congrats to everyone losing and changing and to everyone deciding to start.

I know this is potentially massively offensive but people who have been in extreme deprivation situations where there is no food......get thinner.

Historic situation( too horrible to discuss) or things like The Island and so on. Their bodies don't go into starvation mode and hang onto fat do they??
We are surrounded by high calorie and high fat foods and many people have a complex relationship with food. I sure as hell know,and I should after 50 year of dieting, that diets never ,ever work.