To ask you to tell me the bad things about living in America?

[Witchofzog]

Ever since I was a child I thought I would live in America. Any visits I have made there reinforced how much I love it there (I am aware a holiday is not real life) but for various reasons it never happenned. I am now early forties with a mild heart condition and I am aware it is probably too late for me now.

I went to uni with a lovely woman who has literally got the life I wanted. She now lives in a sunny state with her husband who is handsome AND kind and has made lots of friends out there. And I am both happy for her and envious as hell. I know comparison is the thief of joy but today I have been unhealthily fixated on how her life compares to mine and I find mine sadly lacking. I will pick myself up tomorrow, re-evaluate and am already thinking of what I can do to make my own life better but still I feel sad that I never achieved my dream.

Please be kind. My uni friend is beautiful inside and out and she deserves everything she has - and she worked hard for it. But I really need to snap out of this somehow hence asking for the bad things about living stateside. I am aware my spectacles may be rose tinted so some perspective would be really helpful

Phone contracts are crazy too, £40 here is $100 min there.

I have USA pay as you go SIMS- $50 a month unlimited calls, texts and data.

Personally I wouldn’t live in the US for all the reasons mentioned but I far prefer living in Canada (west) to the UK.

Everything is more expensive here but it’s very pretty and I like the pace of life. Depends what you’re looking for as PPs have said.

I love love love the US as a place to visit but my friend is a Canadian living in America with her American husband and at the age of 38 she still hasn't had her first child despite really wanting to TTC because her and her dh can't work out a way to afford the time off afterwards. The US has I think some of the worst maternity leave in the world.

It's also annoying that the price on a label isn't the price you pay at the till.

I often think that because we share a language and a lot of cultural references (movies, tv shows, music) people assume that the US and U.K. are culturally similar. In fact there's huge cultural differences from state to state in America and the difference between cultural opinions and norms between our two countries is massive. I sometime wonder if it's due to the European settlers coming to America after its 'discovery' historically they must have had a higher proportion of risk takers making up the general population!

Absolutely nothing. As James Brown reminded us

"It Feels Good!!"

DM lived in Texas and is now in Florida, I have spent over 5 years on and off in the states. No problems with guns or crime or anything like that at all, but the working culture is insane. Companies often give 10 days leave and then expect you to spend 3/4 of them at Company events! It's horrendous. Healthcare is the biggest reason not to move there, especially with a heart condition. DM married a rich US citizen or she'd never have afford it. The financial burden is huge, that, not guns, is the problem you are likely to face.

Trump and gun laws

You can't get decent tea in America, for that reason alone I wouldn't be able to live there 😆

I had to make my tea with two tea bags when I was last there. Been three times, doubt I'll go again but if I do it will be California as I really want to go to Alcatraz

The city streets are absolutely rammed with people meth'd off of their faces, public parks are crammed full of the homeless, there are people with mental health problems wandering the streets all the time shouting crazy things. That's what happens when you sell the American Dream to people though; it absolves the government from giving those in need a safety net or a leg up.

Honestly I find almost nothing to admire about American society.

Extreme weather, crazy inequality, consumerism, health care, crime levels, water quality in some areas along with food quality.

There's just a few off the top of my head. I always loved the idea of living in America for a period but that time has been and gone. We have American friends who have bought a homestead and moved out into the middle of no where. Their life looks perfect but they are scared for what the future will bring and how it will affect their children. They have said that the US is like a house of cards with dodgy foundations. The majority of their friends and family are massively in debt, everything is leased or bought from loaned money. It is a scary time to be living in America.

I’ve lived in America since 2003—for eleven years in NYC and now the burbs—and love it here.

I live in a beach town and people are very outdoorsy and into fitness. The local restaurants are excellent—NY quality, one hundred percent—and we have a thriving theater, art galleries, umpteen fitness centers, the beach, excellent local schools, a town golf course, sailing, a skate park and it’s commutable to the city.

I live in a blue town, so most people are anti-gun and I know plenty of atheists. Choose your town carefully and you’ll find your tribe. I would, however, be cautious about moving here without a well-paying job and comprehensive health insurance.

Health insurance issues
Very hit and miss state schools
The need to drive everywhere and your teenagers driving from 15/16 on highways etc to school - very high car accident rates in some areas
Guns

There are some great points to it though. If your child is good at a sport, it can be a free ride through college. Extra curriculars are encouraged. Good food, weather in some areas is great.

Google “Poor America Panorama”. It is very sad. The bit where they are lining up for hours to see the doctor and one of the women says “thank you” so desperately at the leader of the charity as they go in and he just says “you bet - thank you for coming” makes me cry every time I watch it.

I suspect it is a wonderful country to live in for those on top. But I don’t want to be on top if that is what happens to people at the bottom.

Myself I personally own 6 including a handgun and can conceal carry that handgun. I never leave home without it

See, this just blows my mind. I can't even imagine owning a gun, let alone never leaving home without it. I'm so, so glad I live in the UK.

I'd move to New York but probably nowhere else. It seems like the most 'English' of places to live there. I mean that in the sense of being more liberal, tolerant and cosmopolitan. Similar attitudes to climate change, transport, diversity, more opposition to guns etc. I would need to have about £20 million to live comfortably there though

I lived there 30 years.
Lived in a small town California, loved it.
You get used to earthquakes, only really felt the Loma Prieta one in 89. Dh was in the bay area at the time.
We had more trouble with wild fires, but you get used to the routine of that too.
School shootings, we never had one near us, but the kids did Lockdown practice like a fire drill.
Guns, we never had any, the teens learned to shoot at High school in Police Science class by the sheriffs dept, so safety first.
My only beef was probably Dh only got 10 days paid vacation per year and 5 paid sick days without a sick note.
He was in a union, was paid well, and it included healthcare, dental, eyecare and chiropractic. and a good pension.
I only got 6 weeks Mat leave with Ds 1. I took a year off unpaid with Ds 2 and never went back after Dd so was off 7 years till she was in school and then we moved back to UK.
You can buy Tetley british blend in Walmart, and only need one bag to make a good cuppa.

If you've been wanting to do it for so long, just do it, you don't have to stay forever, maybe a couple of years or maybe the rest of your life. Who knows you might really like it.

If I had a secure job, had a shit ton of money to cover medical and education and housing, then I would do it. If I didn't, I would stay put. It's too much of a gamble.

What’s your career OP? HCP I assume means heath care practitioner? What does that involve?

The weather. Aside from Southern California, it's awful. Everywhere.

Would you want to move without your husband?

Trump, guns, no workers rights, religion being such a huge political hot potato, women's reproductive rights going down the swanney...

@AudicityofHope...How weird..For a place absolutely rammed with meth heads and homeless not an issue where I live. Does some Amercan communities have that issue? Absolutely. But not everywhere and most homeless people don't bother you. They are no where as rude, pushy as your chuggers

@GarlicSoup....No. But only because I abhor Prince. Always have. I walked out of his Purple Rain movie and still wish I could get my money back for the wasted time

From my SIL and BIL who just moved back from Florida after 30 years there.
Needing to keep a loaded gun in the house.
Not being able to have pets because of the gators coming in the garden.
Having to have the house fumigated for ticks and insects several times a year.
The hurricanes.
The heat and humidity.
Driving everywhere.
No garden.
Looking at retirement in Florida and realising how empty it is compared to the UK.
Chlorinated chicken.

@RuffleCrow....The closest place you are going to get to the UK in the US would be Boston,Ma.I'm famous for taking off to Boston when I get homesick for the UK

That's my experience of the cities I've been to.

Oh actually, not Boston. Boston was lovely and I'd like to spend more time there not at boring conferences!