To think the future for women in the work place is looking pretty bleak at the moment?

[KittyRainbow]

Just that really. While I understand why certain measures are being taken to slow the spread of C19. I am struggling with how much more it is affecting me than my husband.

We both work full time, and have 3 DC (nursery, primary and early secondary age) We have always had a pretty equal approach to childcare, taking turns with sick days, appointments etc but he does earn 3 times what I do (despite me having more education and better qualifications than him)

My eldest (12) will not be going back to school until September and we have been told that it will likely be part time in school, part time learning at home.
Likewise my middle, who starts reception in September. Again we've been told it will likely be part time. My youngest attends 2 childcare settings. She is only allowed to return to one for now and neither can take her full time.

My husband is due back at work from furlough FT from June 1st. My work have been great, I am currently working FT at home and they've been very understanding so far (helps that he's been on furlough as he has been able to take the children away for conference calls etc) and have no concerns about me being lone carer from June.

BUT they've said that they will expect people to be back in the office from Sept. Most of my colleagues are men and are fine with that.

I will not be able to do that unless schools and nurseries go back FT. Almost every woman I know is in the same boat. Even my secondary age child will need input at home. There is 0 chance she will sit and do school work if she is left at home alone. The smaller two obviously need constant supervision. Husband's work cannot be done from home. Mine can but not with the children around.

AIBU to think that all of the PT school/childcare etc is going to affect women far more than men, and to think that moving forward we will see a trend towards far less women in the workplace?

I'm a woman who has always worked full time, with 3 children and have been single for most of it. I requested a flexible working pattern for years. My ex did too. We worked it out.

If there is another parent, then, it should be agreed to share, with both working hours adjusted accordingly. If there is only one parent, after losing one, the law still applies.

This is all in the company law act. Search "flexible working pattern".

Dont be told, become informed of your rights. Don't resign to work being difficult for us women. If there's another able bodied parent, they 'should' be forfeiting just as much when it comes to caring for and providing for the children.

Of course, I'm not unaware of all the various situations and how difficult it can be to achieve such equality, but we have that as a baseline and in it's set in law.

There is research coming out pretty much every day that corroborates your point OP. It's depressing.

https://www.theguardian.com/global-development/2020/may/29/we-are-losers-in-this-crisis-research-finds-lockdowns-reinforcing-gender-inequality?CMP=ShareiOSAppp_Other

What people have @thenamesarealltaken is the right to request flexible working. And it’s not an automatic right for it to be granted. Many employers refuse it for what seem to be the most flimsy of reasons. There’s no reason to believe they’ll all of a sudden be more understanding.

To respond to queries earlier. DH has few female employees mainly due to their work. Mostly men do engineering degrees! However they have decent policies in place to support parents and offer flexible working and other parent friendly policies. However you cannot make men want lots of parental leave. They presumably work out what they want with the mum. Finances here play a large part as parents have mortgages as housing costs are high. Not everyone will want to be at home with DC. In fact I know plenty of women who have returned to work within weeks. Nanny takes over!

Mostly men do engineering degrees!

A much higher proportion of Indian, Chinese etc women do engineering degrees and degrees western people would see as more "masculine". It derives from cultural norms and attitudes - all of which are misogynist btw.

In the east, the primary failing of women is seen to be the inability to sexually control themselves (seen as failing of women) but there isn't seen to be a great academic deficit. In the west, it is the opposite - we view women as much more disinterested in sex (again, failing of women) and the primary failing of women is that they aren't as clever as men. Funnily enough, each of these failings results in women needing to be controlled by men. It's all cultural conditioning - but you can see the outcomes in the career paths that women choose from those expectations.

Does anyone remember the moral panic 15 years ago when girls were doing better than boys at school and this was seen as a problem to solve? Funnily enough, it's never seen as a problem requiring massive changes when boys outdo girls. Indeed, iirc, in the 50s and 60s girls' 11+ results were scaled down to ensure not too many girls got Grammar school places over boys.

Sadly I think the UK gov will totally fail to think about women and other less privileged groups, which will harm them all. I'm sure they won't for one moment factor in childcare as an important aspect of returning to work.

Surely it is due to the relationship between you and your husband? If you have a proper partnership you share childcare. You don't just think of your own job or career, but your wife or husband's too?

Although I appreciate it sometimes has to be the case where people are in low paid jobs, where both have well-paid jobs or careers decisions about returning to work shouldn't always be based on the highest earner returning.

If your husband is the one who puts his job/career ahead of yours purely because he is a man or possibly the higher paid earner, then you probably aren't in the right marriage.

Surely lockdown has shown us that, unless you are a family operating on the breadline, there is more to life than money.