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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My child has been selected for a Covid test!

408 replies

Livingmybestliferight · 13/05/2020 13:26

He's 10. Does not want to do it. Am wondering why they are doing this and whether it has anything to do with schools opening or not?! Would I be unreasonable to refuse this opportunity?

OP posts:
sergeilavrov · 13/05/2020 13:58

Random testing of the population is really important, as it will help inform what happens with the lockdown situation. One major obstacle of these tests, something which decreases the accuracy of their findings, is people declining. This is because certain demographics are less likely to consent to participation, and that reduced the “random” nature of the sample. This may mean that less than optimal policies are selected, causing either lockdown to go on for longer than necessary or more likely, restrictions to be lifted in a way that causes a surge of infections. I have a PhD in a field that emphasises experimentation in this form, so if you have questions I’m happy to answer what I can. Germany started doing this in early March, while countries like the UAE just test their entire population repeatedly.

If he is able to do so, I would encourage it, as it is a form of public service in itself. If you explain why this is important, maybe he will feel quite important himself, as he’s helping save lives.

StandWithYou · 13/05/2020 13:59

My DS, 13, has one and he has agreed to sign up for it. The letter with it says it is to help develop the approach to testing and is voluntary.

KylieKoKo · 13/05/2020 13:59

I think that consent is an important message to send children. If he doesn't want I don't think you should force him. Just have a chat with him so he understands why it is being done. If he still says no accept it. It's his body after all.

Passmethefrazzles · 13/05/2020 13:59

They’re going to test him not infect him for heaven’s sake. It’s your job to reassure him, he has no reason to be scared! It all helps to build a picture of where the infection is or has been in this country. Don’t test yourself, that’s ridiculous.

ChandlerIsTheBestFriend · 13/05/2020 14:01

What is he scared of? You need to help him understand there is nothing to be afraid of from a test.

FreckledLeopard · 13/05/2020 14:01

DD (in another country, not UK) had one last week - it was absolutely fine, she got the results yesterday and is Covid-free (she had a throat infection). I don't understand why you wouldn't get the test done?

Lostnameperson · 13/05/2020 14:02

I’m really struggling to understand why someone would refuse to do it ConfusedConfused

EffOrf · 13/05/2020 14:02

Maybe he is worried because he thinks he has got it if he has seen bits on the news about testing, so probably needs it explaining that it doesn’t mean he is infected

GrimmsFairytales · 13/05/2020 14:04

He has only left the house twice since march 22nd?? Is he not going crazy or needing fresh air and exercise?

This //\

I think being cooped up for so long has potentially increased his fear.

TheVanguardSix · 13/05/2020 14:05

I’m really struggling to understand why someone would refuse to do it

I think because we've been convinced it's a traumatic test. I have to agree that for a very young child, it might be awful. But for those of us who have given birth, there's no excuse for fear of a swab. Grin

Brefugee · 13/05/2020 14:05

Yes you would be unreasonable to refuse. It's to help society. If you don't want to help society (and it's an uncomfortable test for sure but it's 15 seconds) then don't expect society to help you.

Kaykay066 · 13/05/2020 14:05

I’ve swabbed many many children from tiny to teens and yes it’s not very nice but it is possible and they are easily distracted.

I think if your son isn’t keen to then he shouldn’t be forced as it’s not immediately required for His health reasons so ask him why he’s scared and what of and Discuss why they’ve asked him to do the swabs @ to have a think then move on he might change his mind once he has all the information he may not. No sense in upsetting him others will do it.

Hagisonthehill · 13/05/2020 14:05

As you say it's an opportunity.
You need to be positive about it,tell him how important this t us for 10yr old to take part and that people of all ages are helping,some younger than him.
It is a swab, nothing more.
If he's scared with you let him not have a test testing f he has symptoms at any time?

LordOftheRingz · 13/05/2020 14:06

Respect his right to consenting to the test, he has his rights to refuse.

ScarfLadysBag · 13/05/2020 14:06

What's he scared of? How did you frame the letter/news? I would have thought an excited 'Ooh wow you're going to get to help find a vaccine for Coronavirus!' would get most kids interested. They take their cues from us, after all.

yikesanotherbooboo · 13/05/2020 14:06

What would he be scared of?
I isn't compulsory but all of us are feeling disenfranchised right now , including children, and this is a positive thing that he can contribute.

Porcupineinwaiting · 13/05/2020 14:06

I'm really struggling to understand why someone would refuse to do it

If it involves the nasal sinus swab (aka brain scraping) then I don't. Bloody painful.

BMW6 · 13/05/2020 14:07

I'm struggling to understand why he's scared of taking the test. Is he confusing it with the Covid 19 inoculation? Does he think it will hurt?

Quartz2208 · 13/05/2020 14:07

Yes you would. It is a simple nose and throat swab and will be invaluable going forward with beating this.

BuffaloCauliflower · 13/05/2020 14:07

What have you said to your child to make them scared of a swab? Why haven’t he left the house since March? Have you been filling him with hysteria and now this is the result?

Windyatthebeach · 13/05/2020 14:08

As his dm this is one of those times he does as he is told imo..
My dd is having blood tests done on Friday.
As her dm I made that call.

Oldraver · 13/05/2020 14:08

I'm doing the Imperial College/IPSOS one tomorrow. Obviously it's up to the individual if they want to, but I cant understand why you wouldn't.

My Covid FB group went off on one about this as they all think it a scam

MissConductUS · 13/05/2020 14:09

In New York we've done thousands of covid-19 antibody tests just to find out how prevalent exposure has been, given the large number of asymptomatic cases there are. In NYC about 20% were positive.

I had the PCR test that involved the swabs up the nose. It really wasn't that bad.

Tootletum · 13/05/2020 14:09

Not at all unreasonable if he still doesn't want to do it after knowing what the benefits are. I agree with the importance by that age of understanding consent and not having anything physically forced on them. I would try to persuade him though.

Keepitup · 13/05/2020 14:10

Those asking "why wouldn't you/he do it?" He's only 10 and might be a bit scared. He might think that the swab is like the one shown on the news that goes up your nose and down to the back of your throat, which wouldn't be particularly nice for an adult (who can understand the importance of testing) never mind a child.
Is it just a gentle swab like a DNA test? Maybe there's a video of someone having it done that can reassure him.