Best CF Stories

[CupcakesAndCastles]

Lockdown sucks, what’s the best CF stories you’ve read?

FootInTheRave

Truthisalie, did you pay the younger child in? or, expect the party parents to suck up the cost

Oh piss off. Read my answers.

They didn't pay for my DS as the place didn't require bracelets or tickets. Nevertheless it wasn't in my plans for DS to stay and I had explained myself above.

There is a mom at our school who everybody avoids. This lady ignores everyone on a daily basis with no eye contact. Which is fine, nobody is forced to get involved, but point being she knows none of us and is not even on "hello" terms with us.

I had a party at an activity (so £15 a head for activity and kids meal kind of thing). She shows up with her 5 year old invited DD and sits down with her older DD who is about 10. This older DD is a pain in the arse "know it all" and constantly kicking off that things arent fair when she doesnt get her own way. She has come to me at numerous parties to lecture me on wastage of party food that other children leave and how balloons kill wildlife so i shouldn't be using them . So the family trio sits down and when the children are collected for the event the older DD comes over to me and says "can I join in the party?" No, because its set numbers and I've paid £15 a head and you werent invited. However obviously the more "Im sorry sweetheart, its limited numbers and the places were booked" comes out. The invitation clearly said what kind of activity party it was and, with it being £15 a head, my DC were told to choose their top 12 best friends etc. If i was going to pay £15 for a child to join in it would be a friends child or someone my DC wanted on their list. The entire time her mother sits inanely grinning at me from across the room (first time she had acknowledged me). The food comes and, once again, older DD bounds over "can I have nuggets like my sister?" "im sorry, it comes with the party package. If your mom wants to pop to the cafe they do meals that you can pay for". She asks if her mom can put it on the party bill . No, we dont have a party bill, its all prepaid. However she can go and buy her own nuggets if she wants them. Except her mom obviously doesn't do that and instead lets DD complain and kick off while the other children eat. She then kicks off at her own sister and demands half her food. Mom does nothing, just watches. She then lines up for a party bag and cake with the party children (which I have more than enough of so hand over just to get rid of her).

Over the years I then watched her pull this at every single party we went to. To the point I realized other people had seen the CFery and were watching it unfold at my party. It was so sad for her DC5 though because, due to her behaviour, people stopped inviting her to things. However now they are teenagers and she is just as obnoxious as her older sister and mom.

She has never had a party for her child (despite not being short of money). She had a husband at home at the time who could have minded the older child (he later had an affair with a very young waitress at the restaurant they owned and had 2 DC with waitress). And in the 7 years that I saw her at school daily she never once spoke to me or smiled at me.

@truthisalie what did your younger DC do at food time (if food was included)? Or party bag time?

If they didnt join in those then I dont see how the other parents would know you didnt pay and why its CFery to go to a play centre at the same time as a party? Surely they would just assume you had paid for younger DC?

@Sethy38....yes certainly brought most of this up but things like my sisters husband wanting to lend my husbands van etc they got the same reply that they gave me.
I am LC with this sister but she is by far the nicer one of the two.The other sister I am NC with as she is just toxic.

@truthisalie what did your younger DC do at food time (if food was included)? Or party bag time?

There was no food. Only party bags with a cake. Older DS got it. The place wasn't reserved for this party only. It was full of other people.

If they didnt join in those then I dont see how the other parents would know you didnt pay and why its CFery to go to a play centre at the same time as a party? Surely they would just assume you had paid for younger DC?

They probably could have indeed assumed it but they probably saw my DH not paying.

There could be another reason, now I think. The mums weren't my friends. One mum in their group once told me that she felt annoyed her friend's DC couldn't get a place in the same school (they lived in the catchment area but at the edge; school was oversubscribed) but we got it (we wanted this school and specifically found a place to rent). So maybe they had something against us already and the birthday party was the last straw. Double CFs. Nevertheless, we moved out of the area, DS went to school which wasn't outstanding but most parents were very down to earth and welcoming. It really felt different.

I have spent two days reading these threads. My God, I cannot believe how ignorant, rude, selfish and nasty some people are. The only thing I can add is that you sure learn about people!

I've also had my fair share of CF's...
An ex-bf wanted to treat me to a night away because I had been off work for 3 weeks with a slipped disc. Being s/e and paying a lot in rent and supporting my son at college, I was completely broke, so I did stress that I could not contribute if we did go away. "Don't worry about any money" he said...I paid for our first meal as repayment for his gesture and petrol money and from then on, paid for absolutely everything bar one round of drinks, because he would always be in the loo or somewhere when the bill arrived. When it came to paying for the hotel room, he hid behind a large pot plant and only came forward when I started to panic. I had literally no money in my account and was paying for everything on my credit card. By the time we returned I had spent nearly £150.. when I challenged him, he said that it had cost him fuel to come and visit me so therefore I should be paying for him! I know I probably sound like I'm spoilt, but I would not have gone away had he not offered to 'treat' me and he had a very well paid job. Fwiw, I always paid half for everything, but just couldn't at this time. He could not understand why I dumped him!

I am a long term MN but regular NC.

There is a CF in our village. DD and her DC have a similar birthdays, and as they had been friends from toddlers, we were well aware of that.
One year, I checked when her birthday party was planned, as I didn't want them to clash. She had none, so I planned ours and let her know. Her DS wasn't invited as it was girls only but I felt it was polite. Our party was in village hall, with 20 guests. My parents and I worked really hard, lots of arts and crafts for the kids, games and home made party food.

CF went on to arrange her party for the same day, for 6 guests, using a party service, but to finish 30 mins before ours started, 30 mins drive away.

We had guests in common who had already accepted our invitation. She sent her invites out 2 days after I confirmed my plans with her.

I was a bit but the parents involved said they would leave Party 1 15 mins early, to get to our party. And whatever..: it was just a couple of guests.

36 hours before the party, she asks me to move my party back by 30 mins as she was sad that some guests would leave before they could do cake, to come to mine.

I said I couldn't move the party but I would delay the big games by those 30 mins, for when these guests (DD's BF) arrived.

She then messaged back saying that wasn't helpful, but an hour would be, as her party had cost a lot of money, thank you for our cooperation.

I said no. We had also spent a lot of money, but in a lot of effort and I had given her details before she booked. With a day to go, I was not going to expect 20 families to alter their plans. (We also had to clean up afterwards etc etc).

She hasn't spoken to me since. This was 3 years ago I think?

Another time (same CF), some Indian friends were having a food stall in village fete to raise proceeds to some charities very close to their hearts in India. They asked us, their friends, to contribute desserts. Of course, we were happy to. We all went along to the fête, bought our meals and enjoyed. CF came along and demanded (!!!) her free meal as she had donated a cake. We were all . They had to explain several times that it was a charity event but she dug her heels in. In the end DH paid for her meal.

There are many more examples. She is self obsessed and surprisingly, after 8 years, she doesn't have that many friends left in the village as people wise up to her.

My dads family are all cf. My aunty used to come down and stay sometimes when I was younger and I remember her leaving our house with her car boot full of shopping. She would tag along when my mum and dad went shopping and squeeze in her own shopping on our belt. My dads the eldest and felt the need to be the dad of his family and would never say anything to them. I remember we had this multi pack of Coke bottles where she would help herself and carry it to her car boot. She used to help herself with my mums make up and L'Oréal creams and just take it. Items would go missing every time her and my uncle came to stay at ours. They are just tramps. My dads totally the opposite, he is very generous and I guess that's why our house has always been a target for looting. As I got older, I remember hiding my make up and jewellery and any valuables that I want to see again after their visit.

One time (I don't know what possessed my dad) we went on holiday with them. It was for 10 days and it was hell. My dad literally paid for everything. Her daughter would want something and she would make my dad pay for it and this obviously pissed me off as I wasn't allowed to ask for anything due to the cost of our holiday rapidly increasing. They are no longer speaking to each other because of inheritance, again my dad pulling his weight for my grandmas care etc (revamping the house) the cf's disappearing when they are meant to chip in or meant to pull their weight for care. They are financially in a good position I guess they would be as they never pay for anything.

@nervalslobster I am ashamed to say I gave her the money. She always had a cock and bull story about why she needed it.
Same CF was in the local paper a few years after I'd gone NC. This time, she had a sob story about why she needed to crowdfund her wedding. I have no idea if she managed it or not.

Interestingly, she contacted my business out of the blue last week asking if I could give her something for free, claiming I would be very glad to get a review from her because "we all have to start somewhere" (I've been running this biz for half a decade with hundreds of reviews, but ok). She didn't seem to know it was me -- it was my FB business page and I'm not in England anymore. I said no.

We had a friend that we were quite good friend with when we lived in the UK. We lived in New York & he visited about 2 years ago. He cane to stay with us. We organized to go to several attractions eg Statue of Liberty, concerts, Yankees game. He never offered to pay for anything including meals out. The only thing he bought was himself a Diet Coke for the whole trip.

Very mild compared to some of these shockers but I did once encounter a very entitled CF on BorrowMyDoggy. I had a few hours a week free and offered to walk a local woman's dog occasionally. She replied: 'We want to assemble a team of people to look after Roscoe so you must be able to commit to at least two days per week every week.' Um. No She was just too cheap to pay for daycare for her damn dog.

sallyanne I've often thought that about BorrowMyDoggy. I looked into walking through that website but soon discovered that half of them had dogs but no time to walk them and wanted walkers through the week, at weekends and boarding for when they went on holiday. What's the point in having a dog if you never walk it yourself?

Does anyone remember Liftzilla?! Sadly in the end I think it turned out to be a less than genuine story but my god it was entertaining while it lasted.

Place marking

This ski chalet-trashing CF and her CF friends from 2013 just came up in my "trending now" and I think it's up there with the Mexican House Thief when you read all the updates. www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/1663760-To-tell-them-to-find-their-own-way-to-the-airport-in-a-foreign-country

@louisejxxx do you have a link to that one?

@AnathemaPulsifer

Mexican house thief was a post on a thread, not a whole thread in itself.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/1735637-Have-you-ever-encountered-anyone-this-cheeky

20/04/2013 14:52 WeAreEternal

I just read that thread , wow.

No proper ending though and I want to know how it ended lol!

[quote BiggerThanCheeses]This ski chalet-trashing CF and her CF friends from 2013 just came up in my "trending now" and I think it's up there with the Mexican House Thief when you read all the updates. www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/1663760-To-tell-them-to-find-their-own-way-to-the-airport-in-a-foreign-country[/quote]
Sorry I mean this thread

I have a niece who is a CF just like her mother (my sister). Niece is close-ish to me in age.

One small example to set the scene:
I had had a dress made for a very special occasion. Niece wanted to borrow it for an exchange trip where there was a prom. I said no, as niece is awful with things like this. My sister took it - niece 'forgot' to bring it back from host country. Then said host family would not post it due to them falling out.

Then the big one:
years later, DH and I had sold our house, and were in throws of emigrating. Same niece who used to call maybe monthly, started calling me every hour for 'advice'. She was in tears, as she could not get a mortgage due to bad timing and all she ever wanted was a house and baby. There were tears, tears, tears, and the calls were relentless. If I did not answer, I would find 15 missed calls and countless texts begging for help and advice.(ha)

Eventually - as i did not take the hint- she and my sister asked if niece and husband could borrow our house money for 3 months until a mortgage was arranged. Against my better judgement I agreed but for 3 months only.

3 months on- her husband had changed his job to self employed, so was still ineligible for a mortgage.
I started chasing for repayment, but there was always an excuse. And then I was being a bitch. This went on for almost 2 years, delaying our plans.
DH and I needed our money to buy our own house in our new place. Eventually I engaged a solicitor to send them a letter.

The explosion was huge, but my sister took out a loan against her house to pay us back. Niece was nasty, vitriolic and made a huge fuss about how we were trying to kick them out of their home.

We no longer talk to either my niece or my sister.
Looking back I see the countless awful things my sister has done and realise where her daughter learnt to behave as she does. When you grow up in this dynamic, sometimes it is hard to see the wood for the trees. My sister is a fair bit older than me and was always considered to know best, but as an adult, I realise she is as shallow as a puddle

@BananainPyjama

I have a niece who is a CF just like her mother (my sister). Niece is close-ish to me in age.

One small example to set the scene:
I had had a dress made for a very special occasion. Niece wanted to borrow it for an exchange trip where there was a prom. I said no, as niece is awful with things like this. My sister took it - niece 'forgot' to bring it back from host country. Then said host family would not post it due to them falling out.

Then the big one:
years later, DH and I had sold our house, and were in throws of emigrating. Same niece who used to call maybe monthly, started calling me every hour for 'advice'. She was in tears, as she could not get a mortgage due to bad timing and all she ever wanted was a house and baby. There were tears, tears, tears, and the calls were relentless. If I did not answer, I would find 15 missed calls and countless texts begging for help and advice.(ha)

Eventually - as i did not take the hint- she and my sister asked if niece and husband could borrow our house money for 3 months until a mortgage was arranged. Against my better judgement I agreed but for 3 months only.

3 months on- her husband had changed his job to self employed, so was still ineligible for a mortgage.
I started chasing for repayment, but there was always an excuse. And then I was being a bitch. This went on for almost 2 years, delaying our plans.
DH and I needed our money to buy our own house in our new place. Eventually I engaged a solicitor to send them a letter.

The explosion was huge, but my sister took out a loan against her house to pay us back. Niece was nasty, vitriolic and made a huge fuss about how we were trying to kick them out of their home.

We no longer talk to either my niece or my sister.
Looking back I see the countless awful things my sister has done and realise where her daughter learnt to behave as she does. When you grow up in this dynamic, sometimes it is hard to see the wood for the trees. My sister is a fair bit older than me and was always considered to know best, but as an adult, I realise she is as shallow as a puddle

Oh my God 😱

@WestendVBroadway

Years ago when my DD was 9/10 her friend's mum invited her to accompany them to a local theme park. I had her DD around for tea every Tuesday when the two girls went to Brownies , as her mum said it as too much of a rush to get her home after school, then get her to a Brownies in time. The CF mother then said "ohh just pay for her entry, I won't charge you for petrol"....How kind. I asked if I should make a pack lunch or send her with money for food. She said bring a pack lunch, but send her with money for ice-cream or souvenir. I sent her with an extra £10 for any extras. My DD took some crisps with her pack lunch, but the mother would not let her have them as her kids were not having crisps. My daughter came home with no change and no souvenir etc, I asked what she had bought and the CF mother had told her she had to buy them all chips as as they had been kind enough to bring her. A few days later I saw another school Mum who told me that she had taken CF daughter to the theme park that Monday, they had an offer for free returns for the week. As the other mum could not get there again that week she had given the free entry wristbands to CF mother to make use of and bring a friend . Never liked that bloody woman much in the first place!

OMG! So she asked you to pay for entry, when she had FREE tickets, wouldn't let your little girl eat her crips and then took her money to get them all chips!? I'm so angry reading this, I would have gone crazy at her! Please tell me you said something! That is absolutely outrageous.

I was working for social services and hadn't been there long and was pretty young and green.

I had a meeting at an office with a client and his mum. The kid was on a court order and was obliged to attend or risk going back to court.

At the end of the meeting the mum of the kid claimed she didn't have money for bus fare to get back.get. I was the last person in the office so couldn't access petty cash.

So reluctantly I agreed to give them a lift back to their house. I was single at the time and didn't have much money, so the car was getting on and had been in the wars a bit. The mum sniffed and observed. 'i thought you'd have a better car with a job like yours.' (the pay for social work assistants is notoriously lavish)

I'd been driving for 15 minutes when the mum said 'stop here.'

I did so thinking it was their house. The mum got out leaving me in the car with the kid and crossed the road. I tried shouting after her but to no avail. 10 minutes later, she came back, but with six bottles of lager.
The next bit was impressive. The mum was sitting in the back and managed to open the bottle cap with her teeth and then gob the bottle top out of the driver's window which I had open a few centimetres down. I almost forgave her the cheeky fuckery due to this piece of undoubted skill.

I dropped them home and then asked ' will it be you who picks me.up next time?'

@IrmaFayLear

Not sure if this was a cf or a rude f, but:

We were invited to evening wedding reception of old school friend of dh. We drove for 2.5 hours to this castle, and when we arrived (after the start time, I hasten to add) all the day guests were still in situ at their tables. So dh and I hovered in the foyer for ages, by ourselves, until we saw a member of staff, who informed us there was no extra evening reception, no buffet etc but there was a disco later. It dawned on us that we were the only evening guests What idiots we felt. Dh managed to attract the attention of the groom, we wished him well, and then left with our present . Dh never spoke to him again.

I am not, like some on MN, against evening receptions, but you can’t invite just two people!

Exactly the same thing happened to us.

Midweek wedding a three hour drive away so we had to take two days off work, accommodation at the venue which wasn’t cheap. I would happily have not gone but Mil is obsessive about attending ‘family events’. Got there to find we were the only evening guests and there was no food being served at the venue. The kitchen staff took pity on us and made us some sandwiches but I was so pissed off. It’s unbelievably rude and inconsiderate.