To be surprised a wedding is going ahead on 1st Aug?

[KotoMoto]

We have been invited to a wedding on 1st August and need to RSVP. Today the bride has reminded everyone the RSVP deadline is next week. I was very surprised that it is definitely still going ahead and that there's been no mention of Coronavirus / social distancing or acknowledgement that things may or may not be possible by then. It's in a church followed by a hotel with a large number of guests. The venue is a good 200 miles from the bride's side of the family so people will need to travel, book hotels etc.

We're "vulnerable" so keeping an eye on things means it's tricky to confirm at this stage, but aside from that DH thinks not everyone is as negative as me about the outlook and it's not surprising it's going ahead. AIBU to be surprised that a wedding is going ahead on 1st August?

I’d be surprised. Our daughter has had to move hers from 25 July to next year, sadly

OP here. I'm aware I can just say no, and that's most likely what we'll have to do. I was more interested in the general consensus about whether it's surprising in general that the wedding is going ahead without mention of Coronavirus etc.

We’re in a similar position - family wedding is planned for end July and they’re assuming it will go ahead. I’m pregnant and vulnerable and won’t be going, but I’m leaving it as long as possible to tell them in the hope it won’t be going ahead anyway as it won’t go down well.

@bigchris. She’s in England. The registrar was only cancelling until the end of May 3 weeks ago.

I'm not doom and gloom at all but yes I'd be surprised. I think they may be able to get married - registrar, bride and groom plus 2 witnesses but I don't think they'll be able to have a wedding party.

HarrietM87

Sorry to read that, Harriet. I just don’t understand at all why people who love you would expect you to prioritise going to, effectively, a party, over your/your baby’s health.
I wouldn’t dream of putting you in that position.

My close friend is getting married in July and is carrying on as if it will still go ahead.

I am sure legal weddings will be happening by August and that churches will be re-opened but they like funerals may have limits on numbers depending on venue size maybe half usual density of people often at weddings people are in households; so all the smiths at one tables the jones together etc if you have 30 guests at a wedding it would not be 30 different households all 2metres apart, but probably only 8-10 households at most
I think 200 guests in August is unlikely but 30 quite feasible

I’d be very surprised if it went ahead.
I think it’s been made pretty clear by Chris Whitty this week that social distancing will have to go on until the end of the year at least.

I’m getting married in August (hopefully) and it’s awful as you have to plan as if it’s happening even though it may not. Iv got bags and boxes of wedding things for a wedding that may be cancelled.

I’m certain it will be cancelled. My work is in the wedding industry and all ours have been cancelled until September, and we expect them to start cancelling Those too eventually. People are postponing to next year. Large group events will be the last things ‘allowed’ and the last things people will willingly go to. I would just decline and explain you’re in an at risk group and things look like they will still be uncertain for you then.

I wouldn't be surprised if very small weddings were allowed by August (it is 3 months away), but I doubt that a gathering of 80 people would be allowed.

I am in the industry and our bookings have cancelled up to end of June- I still have weddings for 4th July onwards but expect it is possible they may not go ahead.

Sadly most wedding venues are forcing this. My cousins wedding was delayed in March and the venue has rearranged it for August. She requested it be moved to next year but they won’t allow it unless the government continues lockdown.

Venues are legally obliged to return all money if the wedding is not able to go ahead (frustration of contract)

It won’t be going ahead. I think people are right when they say insurance doesn’t cover it if the couple cancel.

My end of July wedding was cancelled. The venue has closed and the registry office has cancelled.

@Chillipeanuts thanks, that’s kind!

It’s my in laws and the real issue will be that I wouldn’t want my DH or toddler DS going either in case they pick it up and pass it to me, and that would be the major issue. I’m not sure if I’m being unreasonable actually on that point. There are 150 guests and it’s about 100 miles away so involves a train journey and 2 night hotel stay.

if it does go ahead i reckon there'll be restrictions anyway-i woudlnt go if i were in your postion

FFS just say you cant go and leave it at that. Shes probably going through hell. Venue wont let people postpone/cancel unless the government has officially said they can cancel then. I expect they have paid a significant amount of money into the thousands and the venue are demanding final numbers and payments. If they cancel on the venue they will loose the money they have already paid. If they dont pay the final balances they wont be fulfilling their contract and they will loose the money they've already paid. Just do what they want and leave it. I expect they will be able to get married in some capacity by then (the government cant just put a blanket ban on marriage for the next year!) But have a party at another time

Our wedding is September and I’m 99.9% sure wel be postponing. Luckily our venue have given us a back up date already which from reading online is unusual as I’ve seen a lot of venues be really awkward. I think the early summer weddings like June/July are certain to be re arranged but august/September is still possible which is making the decision hard. It would be good to get something like Ireland did which Is clear cut. I’m waiting for next weeks announcement and then will probably go ahead and postpone to next year

It is surprising op. At the very least I would have expected them to acknowledge the weird situation and say 'lockdown depending'

My wedding was rearranged from April to early September and I see no reason why it wont go ahead. However it's very a tiny wedding (11 people at a registry office), I doubt there will be any large gatherings allowed for at least the rest of this year. She probably want to have hope and keep planning, so I would be honest with her and tell her your reasons for not going. You probably wont be the only one.

Someone I know is due to get married in September. The venue has not cancelled yet (only up to the end of June, so far) although they are not booking any new weddings. So they have to work with the assumption that it's happening for now, although. they fully expect a cancelation nearer the time. They are holding out for that, as otherwise they will lose a lot of money in deposits etc.

Well tbh we don't know what's going to happen in August I have a UK holiday booked but I'm assuming it's cancelled I would just assu!e the bride is being optimistic ?