Some people enjoy patronising and depressing others

[Esprohuy]

Clearly everyone is having a different experience of the current situation. It seems to me from the posts here and elsewhere that MN is full of people searching for threads from people either asking genuinely when others think the restrictions may be reduced, or people expressing mental or emotional.distress due to being locked away, sometimes alone. The pattern is the OP posts, there are a couple of sympathetic/in the case of lockdown speculation dovish opinions then the Depressor swoops, usually with a formulation along the lines of:
If you think these restrictions will be lifted anytime soon you are a naïve fool. Christmas will be cancelled and things will never fully return to normal

In the threads expressing mental distress their standard formulation is a variety of:
FFS pull yourselves together. It's been (insert number) weeks, how the F do you think people coped in the war the. All you are being asked to do is stay in and watch Netflix

There seems to be a remarkably large number of people among this cohort who claim grandparental involvement in WW1/2 and have a partner/sibling serving as a front line NHS worker. These depressors seem to scour MN looking to pounce on people expressing povs like the above.

I also think that because a lot of MNetters are enjoying lockdown (the ones who have loads of money, a big garden, still on full pay etc), they’re panicking that it may be lifted soon (and they’ll have to go back to real life/work etc) so are becoming more vocal on threads about how awful everything is and how we can’t possibly go back to normal... because they don’t want to.

Willitneverend

I suspect I'm going straight to hell now

But is it an essential journey??

Also, I think we might have lowered our expectations, It’s not the forced Making Memories happiness or the Holiday if a lifetime pressure.

Things are simpler in lockdown life. Happiness is more accessible.

I think there's something almost liberating about being deprived of choices, if that makes any sense.

No wondering if you should go out to the gym or stay home; no asking if you can afford to buy this or that trivial item in the shops; no working out what to wear today. And so on. It's all these little everyday responsibilities and minor stresses taken away from you. Of course, it gets a bit depressing after a while, but the simple life does have its benefits.

Well. it is being reported that overall, people are happier since lockdown

That was the other thread I was racking my brains to remember; one where the OP said she was much happier since the lockdown because the pressure to socialise etc. was gone. I can understand where she's coming from, but to want other people's freedoms taken away so that you have an excuse to reliquish your unwanted ones seems quite sad (and I mean that sympathetically rather than critically). I guess this is because we live in a society that's geared up for extroverts, and introverts are often made to feel there's something wrong with them.

Well, some people are happier because others are just as miserable as them, but I don’t like thinking about that. Let them be.

Sorry, I meant let them be in that way that I can’t be arsed about them.

The article said it was a lot to do with time pressures and not having to rush about. Also that people who voted remain were more likely to be happy. Not sure why.

I can see how a slower, simpler life with more time spent with loved ones would make quite a few people happier. Hopefully a positive take away from this will be some people slowing down to appreciate the little things and getting off the treadmill of constant unnecessary doing stuff because it’s what others are doing.

The article is here if you want to read it. I can't paste the whole things but will do part of it-

www.thetimes.co.uk/article/how-we-grew-happier-in-lockdown-0t5kb3c00

"What is driving us all to feel happy in this miserable horror movie existence? It seems that if you have no health or money worries, staying at home with your family, having time to do those things you’ve been putting off and learning to enjoy the small things in life is good for the soul.

After the uncertainty of the early pandemic created a sense of powerlessness, the lockdown gave us something to do. And for most people it was relatively easy: stay at home.

“People find what they don’t know very frightening and once they have some idea of where it is going, not the end, but how they are going to cope, they feel much more secure,” Julia Samuel, the psychotherapist, tells me.

People are also “discovering aspects of themselves that they have never had the opportunity before”, she adds, like cooking, being creative, playing games, reading, gardening, spending time with family, not rushing. We have stopped the world and let everyone get off.

“Busyness is an anaesthetic, it stops you feeling,” Samuel explains. “Having time means that you emotionally experience much more so you are freer. On the usual weekly treadmill you spend all week rushing around getting tired, at the weekend you just about recover, and then do it all again. Now we all have time. Until the late 20th century nobody moved, and now we never stop.”

So, unable to get angry about a commute that doesn’t exist, frustrated with that annoying colleague opposite, flustered about the clashing children’s parties, stressed about missing a flight, a play or an envelope opening, we have become happier with our (smaller) lot.

One man who understands the importance of optimism and happiness is Boris Johnson. His reappearance outside Downing Street focused much more on the positives, that the lockdown is working, the NHS has not been overwhelmed, this virus can be beaten and that Britain will be even stronger as a result."

So why, if people are happier, slowed down etc are they feeling the need to be so horrible to others? is it just in their nature then?

So why, if people are happier, slowed down etc are they feeling the need to be so horrible to others? confused is it just in their nature then?

I think it is. They're absolutely relishing the opportunity to lecture others and feel superior to Helen down the road because they haven't left the house once in 7 weeks, or whatever. Competitive isolating is a thing.

This thread is absolutely amazing!

My job is hanging by a thread, I'm working the hardest I've ever done and home schooling my daughter.

BUT I'm enjoying lockdown. No 30 hour monthly commute. I'm home for bedtime, every day. I eat lunch at my own kitchen table. I do work calls in the garden (flagellate me now)

I daren't say this out loud anywhere. Thank you.

Some people just like throwing their weight about. If they can make someone else feel small or inept, it cheers them up no end. Corona has given them a whole slew of opportunities: if they had dogs, they would entertain them at home rather than go and breathe near other people in the park; they only shop once a fortnight; they haven't driven anywhere since two weeks before lockdown started. And so on.

They just enjoy it. Nothing else explains all those smug supercilious types who get into the groove at about 15 and stay in it forever. If someone can convince me otherwise I'd be happy, because I'd quite like to have a sunnier view of human nature.

Anyone seen the latest 'AIBU to be ashamed to be British

yes lol
Other countries have had huge death tolls too but no, we are by FAR the worst country in the entire world and we should all be ashamed of ourselves! So, not only should we be miserable in lockdown, now we also need to beat ourselves with sticks for being British whilst telling everyone else how we are the scum of the earth and deserve nothing good or noble or pleasant. WE ALL DESERVE A GOOD KICKING!

So why, if people are happier, slowed down etc are they feeling the need to be so horrible to others? confused is it just in their nature then

Dementors are never naturally happy though. They only derive pleasure from other people's misery. Therefore, this is the ideal opportunity for them to turn the tables. Before lockdown they would marinate in misery and rage, frothing at the mouth at the thought of others have fun and being sociable and enjoying life. Now we are all in lockdown and they finally have the chance to salivate at the thought that others might be upset or sad or not living the life they were usually jealous of. Thats why they despise anyone who isnt miserable during lockdown - it feels deeply unfair to them that their schadenfreude has failed.

I agree with PP about them practically wetting themselves with excitement at the thought the lockdown would continue whilst they the pretence that it isnt for selfish reasons, oh no! they can justify it by saying "I just dont want people to DIE".

'Also that people who voted remain were more likely to be happy. Not sure why.'

It may be that lockdown and the pandemic as a whole are worse for older people (who are on the whole at greater risk from the coronavirus and possibly also less able to compensate for social and physical restrictions by using technology); people who live in small-town and rural areas (who may have fewer resources to cope, e.g. harder to get deliveries); and those with more worries about economic and job security (one motivation in voting Leave, and also a source of threat in the lockdown). Since remain voters tend on average to be younger, more urban, and probably less worried about job security, this might be an explanation. Personally, I am a middle-aged urban technology-using remain voter, who is extremely unhappy and anxious in the present situation.

They're absolutely relishing the opportunity to lecture others and feel superior to Helen down the road. Ooh they do like to scold.

Other countries have had huge death tolls too but no, we are by FAR the worst country in the entire world and we should all be ashamed of ourselves! So, not only should we be miserable in lockdown, now we also need to beat ourselves with sticks for being British whilst telling everyone else how we are the scum of the earth and deserve nothing good or noble or pleasant. WE ALL DESERVE A GOOD KICKING!

And what do they get out of rehasing the same old arguments for the 100th time? Even if the British response had been as uniquely awful as they insist it was, it's still not a reason to be 'ashamed' of your nationality. How can you be 'ashamed' of something you had no part in?

And again the posts about how Britain is the 'laughing stock' of the world. I'm willing to bet the vast majority of folks everywhere are way too concerned about how their own countries are coping to be laughing at Britain. People really reveal their own obsessions and hang-ups in discussions like theses.

I’ve just used the ♟ elsewhere....

is it just in their nature then?

Sadly I think yes.

I think so too. Dementors are born that way.

Sorry, what's the symbol being posted here?

@IcedPurple it's a daft emoji that we're using to smbolise a dementor. Some of us might be dropping them in on threads where a poster is a bit much...

I also think that because a lot of MNetters are enjoying lockdown (the ones who have loads of money, a big garden, still on full pay etc), they’re panicking that it may be lifted soon (and they’ll have to go back to real life/work etc) so are becoming more vocal on threads about how awful everything is and how we can’t possibly go back to normal... because they don’t want to.

I agree and suspect that these are also the people that want to see furloughed workers going off doing hard labour in a cabbage field for 18 hours a day. As someone said on the fruit picking thread, it's almost as some of of those people with money cannot bear the thought that the lower paid, zero hours contract workers might just get a nice benefit for a change.

I'm the one who started the football thread and tbf, I'm not saying it should never be brought back. I just think it's going to be a few months yet before it'll be safe.