To be emotional at the thought of not having another baby.

[m4mmy97]

Am I being unreasonable to get very emotional at the thought of not having another baby? My partner doesn't want another but I do. We only have one DS. I'm starting to think we shouldn't be together if we want different things? I don't know maybe I'm overemotional..

sorry for the late update. DP and I are not married, nor will we be getting married. we both decided it was a lot of effort for what it is. we're in engaged, have been for years which is just like his parents and is absolutely fine by me.
I've spent the last week trying to convince myself everything is fine and will fall into place. DP sister is currently in labour and I cannot stop crying just thinking about her having a brand new tiny baby.
Everything is not fine, he doesn't want another baby with me. why? am I not good enough? have I spent the last four years as the shi**iest mother in the world and he fears I'll get worse added into the mix.
im genuinely starting to get depressed by this whole situation.

he doesn't want another baby with me. why? am I not good enough?

This isn't anything to do with you, he just doesn't want another baby full stop. It's got sod all to do with you not being 'good enough'. Now he's found out that babies aren't all happy giggles and are, in fact, fucking relentless, he has no wish to produce another.

What happened to the usual MN warcry of "the person who doesn't want a child trumps the one who does"?

sonichu, I don't know but its clear to me I have to be the one to put my feelings aside and bow down to what he wants.

"sonichu, I don't know but its clear to me I have to be the one to put my feelings aside and bow down to what he wants."

But you want him to put his feelings aside and bow down to yours?

@m4mmy97 I'm really sorry you're experiencing this and I wish I knew what to say to make it easier. I've got one DS and after ttc our much- discussed second child my DH decided that he doesn't want another child ever. That was in September last year and I wish I could say it gets easier... Let's just say I'm still waiting. My logical brain says that it's very unlikely to be anything you have or haven't done, more to do with what your partner has going through his own head. My emotional brain however completely relates to how you're feeling as I've also felt like DH's decision not to have another child is a reflection /rejection of how he's experienced me and DS. Hang in there and maybe once lockdown is over you can seek support via friends or therapy?

Meant to clarify we were only ttc for 3 months when he suddenly changed his mind... It's still screwed me up a lot that he didn't say anything until that point 🤦🏻‍♀️

That must be really tough but remember if you leave you’d have to share custody of your current DC so you would never have 2 kids all the time.

You have every right to grieve and feel sad but remember the key to happiness is wanting what you’ve got not getting what you want.