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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be irrationally annoyed with the furloughed?

550 replies

awaywiththecircus · 23/04/2020 17:28

I know I am but I'm jealous that they have all day to lie in the sun, home educate their dc, bake, sew, watch TV whilst I'm busier than ever trying to do it all whilst working from home.
I heard on the radio it's going to cost £50 billion over 3 months and I feel annoyed that the economy is totally f**d because we're paying everyone's salaries, and they're at home doing nothing.
I also know none of this is anyone's fault and IABU.

OP posts:
cherish123 · 25/04/2020 01:05

No - don't be jealous. They could be made redundant several months down the line.

C0mm0nsense · 25/04/2020 01:07

Yanbu- I’m in same situation. Whilst I realise it’s nobody’s fault, I am working harder than ever before. I just cannot stay on top of all the work that’s being thrown at me. I get paid by the hour but I’m working many extra hours a week right now for no extra pay and am beyond stressed and my husband is the same. We’re juggling 3 kids 2-8 years which means a normal day now sees me working from about 7:30am-3pm whilst hubby home schools the kids, then we swap. He then works most afternoons/evenings till midnight.
Then I see people posting pics of themselves sunbathing in their gardens or going for long beautiful bike rides and I’m thinking at some point the 80% pay all these people are receiving will need to be paid back and despite working my backside off and not receiving any of it, when the taxes go up to recoup all this money paid out, I’ll be paying for that too. That doesn’t seem fair. Confused

ArriettyJones · 25/04/2020 01:09

I also know none of this is anyone's fault and IABU.

So pointless thread then? Grin

blubellsarebells · 25/04/2020 01:40

Many people in hospitality will not be getting 80% because tips and bonuses are not included.

aivilodraw · 25/04/2020 07:58

Hahaha you are totally being unreasonable but I couldn’t agree with you more about being jealous. My circle of friends are also currently without kids so are literally laying around in the sun all day drinking and relaxing. I on the other hand am working full time with a 2 year old, my husband has a small hardware store and is working 7 days a week 6am to 6pm to meet demand of customers so I’m pretty much alone apart from the evenings. Being envious is fine, like you said it’s not their fault but I feel ya girl! Monday to Friday I’m pulling my hair out!

Augustlou30 · 25/04/2020 08:14

I'd hate to be furloughed, I think I'd go insane.

oblada · 25/04/2020 08:20

To the pp saying the government will recoup funds if staff are made redundant - don't count on it , it was clear from the start that the furlough scheme could also delay redundancies rather than avoid them. I see no issues with redundancies being made atm and follow furlough.

Re furlough and redundancies - whilst the same criteria don't scrictly apply they shouldn't be widely different and id be surprised many companies would make non furloughed staff redundant and retain furloughed ones. There may be very special circumstances justifying it in some cases (ie company may have decided - it's at their discretion here let's be clear - to give furlough to someone shielding or a single parent with childcare who would actually score higher in the role than others, and of course in some cases nature of the job means WFH isn't possible and neither is social distancing at work) but in many cases I'd expect of 3 ppl are furloughed in a team of 5 they are more likely at risk than the other 2 working.

nanbread · 25/04/2020 08:23

YABU - but YANBU a bit too.

I've just been furloughed and it's a huge relief that we no longer have to juggle DC, homeschooling and work.

On the other hand, I'd rather be working - I'm worried they're won't be a job for me at the end of this, and if there's not I doubt I'll be able to get one anywhere else. My job was also good for human contact and my mental health and self worth.

My salary wasn't over the threshold and we can afford the 20% drop, DH is still working.

I feel very sorry for those furloughed for whom that 20% drop means they are struggling to afford the basics ie minimum wage.

I also feel sorry (less so, obviously) for higher earners who are not being topped up. Someone I know was on £65k with a big new mortgage to match and sole breadwinner, is now taking home the equivalent of £30k on furlough. They'd not been in the higher paid job for long and all their previous savings went into the new house. They're worried about losing the house.

murakamilove · 25/04/2020 08:44

It’s ok to be jealous though! I’ve got so much work to do and most of my company are doing nothing and getting paid. I know it’s wrong to be jealous but I’m feeling pretty bitter about too op.

HarriR · 25/04/2020 08:49

Nope, it's ok to be annoyed. I had no choice to wait 12 years for my boy. To have a year out with him. Then to find that the very month I go onto my reduced pay, everyone at work gets furloughed! So we have no baby classes no one to visit. However I wouldn't change him for the world, just sometimes feel this time is stolen from him. I also worry about how this will affect him socially.

julieandertoninthewarehouse · 25/04/2020 09:06

I don't think YABU OP. Obviously everyone's circumstances are different and some people are desperately worried about their jobs - but a friend of mine is furloughed until end of June on full pay, has just had a large bonus payout & isn't at all concerned about losing her job. She's loving being paid to potter around in her garden all day. Do I feel jealous of her when I"m working 60+ hours a week from home? Yes. Yes I do. It's perfrctly normal.

SinisterBumFacedCat · 25/04/2020 09:11

Then I see people posting pics of themselves sunbathing in their gardens or going for long beautiful bike rides and I’m thinking at some point the 80% pay all these people are receiving will need to be paid back and despite working my backside off and not receiving any of it, when the taxes go up to recoup all this money paid out, I’ll be paying for that too. That doesn’t seem fair.

People on furlough have paid taxes all their working lives and will continue to pay taxes when they go back to work. It is not only people working now who pay taxes. How many times does this have to be pointed out?

sandragreen · 25/04/2020 09:40

I think OP probably accepts that from the macro point of view, she is BU. We need to have furloughed workers in order to give business the best chance of picking up where they left off when this is all over.

However, I do agree that from a micro point of view it is a bit shit when you are working and your boss has put all their favourites and their family members (I kid you not!) on furlough and you are soldiering on, doing their work as well as yours. That is the position I find myself in and I am totally pissed off. They are all getting the additional 20% top up too.

I am angry with my manager though, for being so blatant with the favouritism. I don't think any of us will face redundancy, but if we did, it certainly won't be the people he has put on furlough. It's not their fault though.

Stepping away from Social Media is probably a good first step OP. Flowers

pembs · 25/04/2020 10:00

I think you've answered your question in your question. You admit your thoughts are irrational so there's your answer. Having said that i understand what u mean, the weather has been so lovely, I'd love to sit in the garden like my husband can but, no i have to work so it is frustrating. He has to be furloughed though, so we can eat

Gwenhwyfar · 25/04/2020 10:03

"Hmm..... but at least you can wfh!"

I would much rather NOT wfh. I completely hate it.

Gwenhwyfar · 25/04/2020 10:05

I was told the other day that I shouldn't get expenses for wfh because I'm still being paid. The reason why I'm still being paid is that I'm still working. There are plenty of people still being paid and not having to work.

I am totally in favour of furlough of course, just that to make out those of us working from home are incredibly lucky when I see my friends having a nice time doing nothing...

MaggieMagpie357 · 25/04/2020 10:05

I feel sorry for my husband, who agreed to a 20% pay cut before the furlough scheme was announced, subsequently most of his team were then furloughed, but he continues to work harder than ever for 20% less salary! Grossly unfair.

BlindAssassin1 · 25/04/2020 10:21

Yeah, I feel a petty jealousy too. I want to stay home and not try and cram in work and schooling and blah blah blah.

And I'm sick of this 'we're all in it together' business, which I'm even seeing on bloody t-shirts now! We're not. Some of us of fucked and for the long term, working or furlonged.

Its the significant minority that piss people off. The sunbathers and the DIYers who are supremely confident they're going to be just fine and dandy come hell or high water. Yes, they in fact, can fuck off.

nanbread · 25/04/2020 10:23

@HarriR don't worry about socialising at this age, all they need is their primary caregivers. Must be hard for you though.

HarriR · 25/04/2020 10:47

@nanbread. Thank you. It's just a niggle at the back of my mind 😪

StudentMummy20 · 25/04/2020 10:48

I'm a bit worried that I won't have job to go back to but my daughter is very young and as a lone parent I'm already receiving a top up of UC, which has risen in light of my reduction in payand I'm not having to pay the nursery fees either, top that off with just having to moved back in with my mum to save some money (timed well right before lockdown). I am also due to start uni in September so of I lose my part time minimum wage job in a pub then so be it, it's not the end of the world, I'd rather it be me than one of my colleagues to lose their jobs when they need it to make ends meet.

I'm actually loving the fact I get paid more on furlough than I do most weeks when I'm actually at work. I've only been at my job since November and as average salary is used, Christmas time boosted my average in quite a big way! So yeah, I'm quite happy to be at home on my 80% wage and actually spending time with my little devil!

Gwenhwyfar · 25/04/2020 10:51

"I feel sorry for my husband, who agreed to a 20% pay cut before the furlough scheme was announced, subsequently most of his team were then furloughed, but he continues to work harder than ever for 20% less salary! Grossly unfair."

Yes, that's very unlucky. A friend of mind had his hours cut to 50% before the furlough scheme was announced. They were all then furloughed - much better.

DonnaDarko · 25/04/2020 10:54

YABU

DP and I have both been furloughed. Neither of us are sure we will have jobs when the scheme ends - I'm in fundraising and DP is in IT but for a travel insurance company. We have a child to support. The insecurity is really getting us down.

Curvy01 · 25/04/2020 10:59

I employ 10 staff who are all furloughed ATM. Most of my people are single parents who find living from month to month incredibly tough. Our business reboot plans should see us back up and running to capacity quickly but you never know? I’m grateful there’s government help to look after my very loyal team. ❤️

MaryShelley1818 · 25/04/2020 10:59

OP YABU (but you've already acknowledged that) but it's totally understandable to feel the way you do. It can feel like a raw deal to those of us still working. DH is wfh and I am still working too (front line essential) as well as being at Uni studying. DH gets up at 5am to get a few hrs in while it's quiet, and I'm working from about 8am to 10pm some nights to be able to catch up on stuff because we also have 2yr old DS at home who is being borderline neglected. We haven't so much as managed a family walk in over a month.
I support the furlough scheme 100%, I feel total sympathy for those who are now struggling more financially and worrying about their jobs (we are worried about DHs) but I'm also really envious of the people who are spending all this time doing wonderful things with their children, baking, arts, outdoor fun etc I'm friends with lots of people who are having a wonderful time and while I don't begrudge them I wish I could be too, I feel so guilty about DS.

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