To think DD isn’t earning enough to live alone in London?

[Sunnydaysp]

DD is 27 and earns £65k a year. She currently has a long commute in to London for work each day but following her recent divorce and sale of their home, she wants to move to London for a fresh start. She has no DC, so is looking at one bed flats which appear to be around £1,500-£2,000 a month in rent, not to mention all of the bills on top too. I appreciate that DD earns a very good wage for her age, however, I’m concerned that she will be stretching herself too far by attempting to live alone and paying an extortionate amount in rent rather than house sharing, which seems to be the norm for most young professionals. She seems to think she can easily afford it, but DD has never lived alone and doesn’t really seem to appreciate the cost of living, as ex husband always managed the household outgoings etc. AIBU in thinking that DD will be stretched in attempting to live alone on her salary in London with the rental amounts described?

OP - I moved from my parents house to shared uni houses, to flat shares in London to sharing a flat with the now DH, then buying a house together and having DCs.

I do wish I'd lived alone at some point. I was only just beginning to get to the point I could afford to live alone when DH was moving to London (we'd had a long distance relationship) so we rented a flat together.

This is the perfect time for your DD to do this. And as others have said, she'll have lots of spare cash and won't be worried about the pennnies.

For those saying “mind your own business”, DD has chosen to involve me in these discussions, therefore I am within my rights to share my view with her

I don’t know. Your daughter is 27, has been married, divorced, has a job which presumably comes with a lot of responsibility, and you are online asking strangers about her finances!

From your updates, you sound really involved in something which your daughter seems perfectly capable of dealing with herself.

I can imagine you pretty much interrogating your daughter about her plans and, to get you off her back, she is involving you for the sake of an easy life. I don’t think for a minute she is involving you willingly!

As long as your daughter is sensible she can afford to buy. She needs to concentrate of saving a decent deposit for now by being mean, staying in, not buying clothes, manicures etc. The money mounts up fast. Look further out in london, get a 2 bed of her own and rent the spare room out much more financially savvy in the end.

MN really is full of bossy boots, residents association leading, Brown Owl types isn’t it.

The daughter wants to live somewhere central and is happy to rent. Living out in the arse end of nowhere with a lodger and living off soup sounds the worst thing in the world if you’re 27 and divorced and actually want to live somewhere more central.

If her take home pay on £65k is £4k that would suggest she isn't paying into a workplace pension. Maybe she's paying into one from her take home pay but worth checking she's got that covered - people often think it's too early in their 20s to worry about!

Depends where she wants to live and what she wants to do. It sounds a lot to people not used to London, but it’s not going to go far if she decides she wants to pitch up in Notting Hill, for example.

At 27, I expect she’s enough of an adult to do her research and work out what she wants and where. I’d support her doing that, not look for problems 🤷🏽‍♀️

oh yes OP - your job in all this is to say "lovely". She can easily afford to rent a flat at £1.5-2k a month. She will have enough to live off and save from the remainder of her income.

stop talking about if she can afford it - that's obvious she can .

What she might not be able to do, is afford it and have the lifestyle/savings levels you would chose to have if you were earning that much as a single young woman. So perhaps you need to remember its her choice about the rest of her lifestyle if she prioritises a lovely flat.

I work in London. Plenty of people I know live in studios in nice areas in nice blocks for far less than that.

Look properly and yes she can afford it.

I think she should consider her future earnings before making a decision. If she's likely to be on 100 k or more by 30 then spending 2k a month on rent isn't an issue in the short term. If her salary is likely to increase slowly then saving may be more of a priority unless she already has savings and investments and a considerable chunk of equity in a property.

What does she do please with no degree at the age of 27 to earn that much?????

I escapedsplit up from my Significant Twenties Relationship and initially moved into a shared house initially. I found it incredibly difficult and really depressing even though it was technically lovely and the people were really nice.(still friends 20 years on). I don't blame your daughter for feeling that she needs and wants her own space. I'm also assuming a job paying £65k is quite demanding, which is not necessarily compatible with making and maintaining relationships with housemates. And she's not young and she is very well paid.

Where in east london is she looking to rent a 1 bed for 1500-2000?The bottom end of that is believable for zone 1 & 2, but 2k is a lot for a 1 bed even looking really centrally. Just looking at rightmove, there are lots of nice 1 beds at the 1500-1600 mark! e.g. www.rightmove.co.uk/property-to-rent/property-69249480.html (this is zone 1 right next to the city, though probably a bit noisy as it's on a main road in Shoreditch)
www.rightmove.co.uk/property-to-rent/property-78755473.html (lovely flat right next to Victoria park on the border of bethnal green/hackney, about 5 minute walk from bethnal green tube)

If she wants cheaper, there will be lots of slightly less nice flats in zone 2, and still very nice flats in zone 3. Or she could look outside of east london.

65k is more than enough to live alone in London in a nice place, but she'll just have to accept that a larger than normal % of her salary goes on rent. Spending 1500 a month on rent will still give her 2500 for everything else! That is enough to pay bills, have fun and still save.

*And you think £65k is a “very large salary”

For living and working in London?

What part of London?*

We live nicely on that in a "naice" part of SE London. Granted it won't get you Islington or Chelsea, but the area we live in is very nice.

My mum raised 4 kids in Hackney (and recently too as my brother is only 18) on significantly less than that!

For those saying “mind your own business”, DD has chosen to involve me in these discussions, therefore I am within my rights to share my view with her

There’s a difference between being supportive in discussions and going off to post threads and research stuff yourself

Be careful that her husband taking charge of everything hasn’t dented her confidence to the point that she thinks she needs other people to help her make decisions

Where does it say she has no degree? All the OP has said is that she doesn't have any student debt.

OP for what it's worth I think you've raised a smart cookie. You should both be really excited about the move, she's going to have a great time in her little London pad, living it up a little after her divorce. This city is great place to be a successful, bright young woman.

As long as your daughter is sensible she can afford to buy. She needs to concentrate of saving a decent deposit for now by being mean, staying in, not buying clothes, manicures etc. The money mounts up fast. Look further out in london, get a 2 bed of her own and rent the spare room out much more financially savvy in the end.

Sounds absolutely miserable. This obsession with living on the bones of your ass in order to say you own a house is ridiculous. Let her live a little.

Of course she can afford it! I live on a bit less than that in Zone 2, East London, and I’m supporting a child without any financial contribution from my ex-husband. We have a perfectly comfortable life.

She can easily afford it. And sounds like she’s gone through a bit. If I was young, single, and rich enough I’d love to live like that!

£1500-£2000 is perfectly normal for a one-bed in central London. It might be shocking to you if you live in another area of the UK, but it's the reality. I lived on my own in a £1400 flat earning £35k for years, perfectly comfortably, so I'm sure your DD will be fine. I'm not surprised after her divorce she wants this bit of freedom and independence. Good for her. After a couple of years she'll probably start thinking about getting a mortgage, but for now just let her organise her own life.

FWiW all the high earners I know (50k plus) don't have degrees. I think because they're now paid for, they're just as much a 'must have accessory' than actually a gateway to a successful career.

But that's just showing my age, that I can remember when education was free. And it still should be.

Plenty of careers will get you 65k with 10 years experience if you have the talent and determination. Assuming Ops DD started work at 18ish. Such as information security, finance, digital marketing, sales. Sure other posters can think of others

For those saying “mind your own business”, DD has chosen to involve me in these discussions, therefore I am within my rights to share my view with her

It sounds like she's told you what she's planning not necessarily asked you for advice. Even if she had asked you for advice the best thing you could do for her is say "look DD you're an intelligent, independent woman I'm sure you'll make the right decision". What she doesn't need to hear (either explicitly or implicitly) is "well your ex husband handled the money so you probably don't know what you're doing, let me handle this big decision for you".

Renting isn't dead money. Renting for 10 years in a stunning, central London flat I could not have afforded to buy with a shared roof terrace with people from other flats our own age meant my late twenties and thirties were the bloody time of my life. I don't regret a thing. Better than sitting in a terraced house in Croydon with a soul destroying commute but knowing I've made a sensible investment decision...
Enjoying life at that age is significantly more important than throwing all your money into an asset. So you've paid it off when you're 55? Great! Now what? Sit and watch tv?
She's making totally the right decision. Probably saving time on expensive long commutes too.

London would be empty if everyone thought that
65 k is a huge salary and I know of couples in London who earn less than that between them with similar rent and still do ok
Plus someone living somewhere else on 30 k ( still above average ) living in a cheaper part of UK paying say £700 a month would have less disposable income
2 k for bills and going out is what plenty of families live on before rent and bills

that made me chuckle 🤭

@naked

@GlamGiraffe she's 27 not 47. She doesn't want to live at the end of the Northern Line