Irritated, irritable and irritating. AIBU to be tolerant in RL and tell them to get fucked on this thread.

[fuckinghellthisshit]

IABU. Unreasonable and I know it.

I am just so fucking irritated at the moment. Everything is grinding my gears. DD's constant fucking exercising, DS leaving his shit everywhere, DH's following me around and just fucking breathing everywhere.
I am being a model of kindness and tolerance but I do wish every bastard one of them would fuck off.

And face timing my DGM97 every day at exactly 6pm to watch her slowly lose her shit (she's been in lockdown for 6 weeks already) and become unkempt is horrendous. Arguing with her for hours about politics (she lives for these debates and asks for robust challenging - good for her mh she says) is exhausting. I just want to lie down, I don't care what Mark fucking Steel is saying today - he can get fucked too.

My mean GD97 who has been living in isolation for 40 years and never wanted a visit or call but suddenly needs the warmth and kindness of his family - well the women in his family, and I am especially sought after as the busiest person. Fuck you mean old man, you are alone for a reason! you made your miserable lonely bed now lie in it!

My normally sane DM is in full lunatic mode, needing constant love and reassurance, leave me alone! I am your child! What about me! Why not rind one of my many bastarding twat brothers. And stop cooking for 12-18 people - there are only 2 of you there - that's why you're getting so fat - not stress hormones.

My tribe of idiot brothers who all refused to accept there was any problem and spouted full Trump rhetoric until my DGM's neighbour died and then had massive mantrums demanding I send them all food. Get fucked!
.
I love these people so very much. I also loved my small business and working, and being on my own a bit. I care so much, but I want a break and a vent. So here, in the safety of MN, I will tell them all to get fucked.

Thank you, I feel so much better now.

Everyone else has gone to bed. I'm so tired, I should go too. But I'm ALONE downstairs with only the hum (and occasional odd mooing sound) of the fridge for company.

I have added Kahlua to next week’s supermarket order.

Yanbu. I would say more but I have also had my battery drained today I'VE NOTHING LEFT

Well, I just wanted to send a huge thank you to you all for this thread.

My absolute fucktard of a DH has left me seething as he really can't understand the distancing and thinks its perfectly acceptable to sneak out and sit with the neighbour (in their garden) sharing wine while I slave away cooking - even tho DH is a frontline healthcare worker (clearly trying to infect everyone).

I have had this row so many times after "catching" him more often than I care to share. He clearly has ZERO respect for my opinion (which is basically law right now).

So yeah - I went BEZERKKKKK!!! Grade A* absolute bat shit crazy mental!!

He's just a massive man child and tonight I despise him so very utterly for:

His stupid drunk voice and gurney faces because he's so smashed.
His weak arguments which roll in quicker than he's able to utter them so he just kind of blughhhhs shit out incoherently.
For the fact that I did everything in the house today and he hoovered 2 rooms (after being asked).
For the fucking takeaway I have been wanting for 2 days, but never got because I cooked as there were a few bits going out of date and then tonight he sulked upstairs and didn't eat anything anyway!!!

And I still hate him right now because:

He was sat up there like a big baby watching fucking actual MARVEL - "but its certificate 18" so not actually making you more of a man child - MUCH - you're nearly forty-fucking-two, playing fucking hours of games on your fucking phone but can't multitask, even to the level where you could answer a simple question and play an imaginary "shot" at pool simultaneously..... GAHHHH!

And to top it off I really need to get up to bed now and he is snoring so loudly, probably fully clothed and on top of the fucking duvet.

(BTW I fucking LOVE my cat - she makes it all bearable - pick your battles guys - the fluffies cannot be as bad as the rest of them!!)

OK, these are what I think might be failsafe jobs we (I) can give to other family members that I believe won't result in me having to re-do. But that I bloody hate doing myself:

1. Stripping the beds
2. Putting said bedlinen in washing machine and putting machine on

(obv not taking it out/hanging out/tumble-drying unless a lot of very creased stuff is wanted)

1. Re-making beds with previously (by me) folded linen from cupboard
2. Emptying house bins into outside bins

(obv not cleaning/re-lining said bins) 5.Putting bins out for bin men.

You don't have to thank me.
That's it though.

FreezerBird

We also have a mooing fridge!

I’m going to be working from home starting Monday since our company has been given the greenlight to start a staggered reopening. Now you’d think, in view of the fact I’ve been bored out of my tiny mind for 4 weeks and would have killed for my work station to be set up here 3 weeks and 6 days ago, I’d be ecstatic about this wouldn’t you? But they’re going to come by tomorrow to bring supplies, set up remote access and a printer so I can get on it first thing Monday and that is really pissing me off. It’s fucking Sunday! No I don’t fucking care that I’m being completely irrational in view of the fact that every one of the last 28 days has been like fucking Groundhog Day and I actually couldn’t pick any of the Sundays out of a fucking line up. It’s fucking Sunday!
And breathe.

Have to say I’m really looking forward to doing some work on Monday though.

I need to improve the contents of our drinks cupboard.
Only has 2 types of whiskey and some fortified wine.🤨

Kahula, chocolate milkshake and vodka. Tidy 👌

I was trying to insure our car and get a telephone consult for dd 2 yesterday, both time-sensitive and important and STBXH came wandering around and asked if I had thought about tea.... Meanwhile dd1 plays music in the shower so loud it can be heard streets away and has house party chats with friends until 3 am sometimes, running up and down stairs, drinking and banging doors. It floored me and still does, my Mother has just died and she has been horribly rude and selfish, made things far far worse than they already were. I have had thoughts about self harm but kept a lid on them, but the atmosphere has been terrible dd2 is fragile and ds has been working very hard, he had good news at work and very little notice was paid because of all the other SHIT. FUCK!!! On the other hand friends have been very kind and my counsellor has said I can email her as extra support. And MN has been (mostly) a support as well.

Hmm, we have a half-bottle of Screwball PB whiskey, 5 unlabeled bottles of a really delicious red wine from a local winery that DBro got from playing a gig (he thinks it's a sirah), 2 bottles of red cherry merlot wine, and a hidden bottle of Amaretto. But we also have some great bud (legal here) which is far better for relaxing and reducing the irritation factor IMO.

But my 'happy hour' is finally here not due to weed or booze, it's due to the fact that DH is going to bed. The house will become blissfully quiet and I will watch 'British detective dramas with a strong female lead' on Netflix peacefully alone!

DH, the twat, has just announced he's going to be DD's new fitness coach despite never having played netball and knowing nothing about it.

A few tips for mums who want to irritate your teenagers right back is to refer to 'me-mes' rather than memes. Gets them all stressed out. That., and putting the emphasis on the wrong bit of words, like cara-VAN, or deeJAY or wheelCHAIR. That and dancing holding kitchen utensils. Oh and letting your trousers get really low. ^^

Weeps

Me-mes

@Randomword6 - is your DD1 the DD of your STBXH? If so, perhaps she should do the rest of the lockdown at his instead, as she sounds utterly awful and if he's her father then he should take a turn dealing with her!

Sorry about your mum :(

I am of an age where my DPs have passed on, the DCs are grown and have their own families, but not of an age where I need anyone to 'check I'm alright'. So look forward to that time folks, it is bliss. I can contact any family when I feel like it for catch up. But otherwise am free to make my own decisions, do what I want!

Tea in the small espresso cup and the huge zombie eye have had me howling 😂😂😂

IABU- DS is 2. It's not his fault (chanted multiple times a day) but..... stop screaming you want toast, I've given you toast. How the fuck am I supposed to know you meant blueberries?

You're tired, I know you're tired- you've picked lockdown to start waking at 5. We have 14 hours to fill of being in this house with no chance of activities.

So, if I can go to the toilet ON MY OWN without you asking what I'm doing and requiring a running commentary, I'd appreciate that.

You want to watch In The Night Garden 400 times in a row- that's fine I dont care anymore- we're not worrying about development any more, this is survival, my brain has gone numb and I envy Makka Pakka. He lives on his own in a cave. What I'd give to be on my own in a cave.

DH- FUCK OFF. Go back to work, it isn't nice having lunch together EVERY FUCKING DAY. It isn't nice that when you finish work, you're here. Already.

Also, fuck off with your breathing. Its unnecessary. You just breathe all over the house. Fuck off and breathe somewhere else.

By the way the dirty plate/mug etc that you produce after I've emptied the sink of washing up and chuckle about isnt funny. It makes me want to smash it on your stupid head.

You're un comfy having to work on our bed as DS wont leave you alone. Well guess what, I'm un comfy when DS is jumping on my head playing "jumping". I'm also trying to WFH by the way. Let DS jump on your stupid head.

Just everyone leave me the fuck alone for 5 minutes.

Thank you, that feels better.

Oh my goodness, the noise! DH is the quietest man alive, there is no conversation instigated by him. Ever. But by God, his nose! It snurfles, it snorts, it whistles and it wheezes all day long. Then, to add to the joy it then snores ALL BLOODY NIGHT LONG. But it’s not his fault, oh no. He went to the doctor 15 sodding years ago and they said he’d just have to put up with it There may be digging soon.

EdwinaMay, what age are you then? I'm 51,am I close?

You want to watch In The Night Garden 400 times in a row- that's fine I dont care anymore- we're not worrying about development any more, this is survival, my brain has gone numb and I envy Makka Pakka. He lives on his own in a cave. What I'd give to be on my own in a cave.

😂 this made me laugh. Love this thread, makes me feel sane (ish)

Remember a while back they were advertising for a hermit to go live in a cave somewhere? I thought at the time that it’d be a horrible way to live. Right now though, it’d be absolute fucking bliss. I’ve been pushed over the edge this morning by crumbs. Clearly I live with Hansel and Gretel since theres a permanent trail of bastard crumbs all over the house and now they’re all stuck to the bottom of my feet. I hoovered last night, yet there they are.

If the DC don't pack in the constant fighting and wrestling I might as well sign them up for the UFC and at least make some money out of the buggers. I can’t get a second to myself. Even when I go to the toilet someone’s there asking what I’m doing. I’m building a new hadron collider in the u-bend, wtf do you think I’m doing in the bathroom? Add that to DH and his new found inability to decide on anything and the hermit thing just gets more appealing.

None of you have faked a headache/not feeling well, to get some alone time.
I have

No children here but ‘D’P has chosen this time to wheel out every hobby known to man and all the associated paraphernalia that I usually hide in the loft or the garage. My - previously tidy - living room currently contains a guitar, a set of weights, a frigging keyboard on a stand, some kind of tiny model making thing that is taking up the entirety of the coffee table, and a cycling helmet on the floor. Thankfully the bike is outside. I am about ready to do some damage with one of the weights if I fall over one of them one more time!

I am currently doing my physiotherapy. Well, I am sitting in bed drinking tea and reading MN but no one needs to know that do they?

Fuck knows how many people DP thinks live in this house. I have just opened the fridge and a large Pyrex roaster fell onto my foot.

It contains the mortal remains of the Signature Lasagne. Which are fucking huge.

Close questioning has revealed that he used a kilogram of twatting mince. For a lasagne. For 2 people. It would have fed 9 normal people easily, or 6 greedy bastards. We are 2 people, one of whom used to be normal but is now verging on the psychotic, and a small, elderly dog.

Wtf am I going to do with it? I can't even microwave it, because the microwave was sent to the tip months ago (DP preferred this to cleaning it, which I refused to do, because I never used it).

If anyone is in or near East Sussex and fancies some lasagne, a handover could be arranged....

Tea and bed is the best sort of physio.

Rum and an axe can have bad side effects.